I Desperately Want Out

good luck honey

Your feelings are completely normal! I recently was given some great advice from the Nursing Director at a Psych Facility. He stated that by 6 months to 1 year of nursing the stress level may be incredibly high, but to stick with it. He said not to make any quick decisions but instead to stick it out, stating that basically it would be like a teeter totter and in time the stress level would come down. He told this story not knowing that I had experienced that level of stress as a brand new LPN working in a Nursing Home, my stress levels were incredibly high, the nurse to patient ratio was unreal, and I found myself crying daily in the stock room. I felt like I had made the worst decision ever. I quit. I went to work for an Oral Surgeon for 3 years and LOVED every single minute of it! Fast forward from LPN to now...I am currently in my last semester of RN school, sometimes wondering if I will have those feelings of stress, sadness, feeling overwhelmed, but I stop and think...Nursing is so BROAD! You can do so much! Locally we have clinics owned by hospitals that offer M-F 7:30-4:30, no weekends, holidays off, the pay is comparable to hospital pay, benefits are amazing and a family life would be completely attainable! Keep your head up! Explore your options, see what is available near you! I truly believe you can find your niche. Good Luck! "Do what you love, Love what you do!"

Aww, I'm so sorry the transition has been bumpy for you! Others have said the first year to few years is not easy. They're completely correct!

Please don't take this the wrong way, but what you have described makes it sound like you are burnt out! What do you do on your off-work time? While you figure out "what next", focus on improving your non-work life. Do things you enjoy, go to classes you enjoy when you can (hobby, gym, etc). Grab dinner with friends. Figure out what it is that you love doing and incorporate that to your routine. Declutter if you have anything cluttery (I did this recently and am so much less stressed without clutter!).

There are LOTS of options in nursing that do not require strictly nights, weekends and holidays. I almost wrote the profession off because of a bad work experience elsewhere. I am SO GLAD I didn't. I'm that person who changed jobs twice in my first year, by the time I started with my current employer, I was on my THIRD job. I've now been with that employer > 6 years so it balances out eventually. I found something different in nursing that I thought I might enjoy. Turns out I love what I tried as a last ditch option. You may not find what you love in nursing and that is okay. But it might be possible too.

I work in the OR. Easy? No. Completely perfect schedule? No. But most days it's not so bad an I enjoy what I do. I have amazing coworkers. I finally feel like I "belong" in a job. More than anything, working in a trauma center has gifted me with the best sense of perspective I think I could have developed. I get to help people when they are the most vulnerable possible - we don't routinely allow family back, it's not like ICU where a sedated patient might have a visitor the entire time. We occasionally allow parents back for anesthesia induction, but that is about it. It's an honor and a privilege to care for patients. I've been burnt out in this job too. That was a horrible experience. But I got out of that (I was in a series of really bad cases back to back to back). It took some time, but I got to a better place.

I found 12s to be too much, I didn't get enough non work time in a day. I really liked working 10s, and I like 8s when I only work 8 hours. If I work more than 8 hours most days in a week, that gets a little old and annoying. Night shift was so much worse than days or evenings, and I'm grateful to be primarily on days. I do work nights sometimes (on call) and I do work weekends sometimes (on call). The majority of the time, no, that's not my life.

I don't mind working 1-2 holidays a year (in our department this is what the holidays end up being when we've shared among everyone). I know ahead of time which ones I will have, and can make alternate arrangements. I grew up in a household where my dad was not guaranteed to be home for holidays either, and my mom has worked retail off and on throughout my life. Both have had to work holidays - and I would 1000% rather be working in health care than in their jobs on/around holidays. None of the patients would really honestly, choose to be in the hospital over the holidays.

Start applying to insurance companies or a position involving utilization/review. Clinical and bedside aren't your only options! You could work a great 9-5 job.

I think you have to do some soul-searching to make sure that your career choice is the source of your dissatisfaction. It wouldn't be pretty to leave nursing if, for example, it were your relationship or some core personal unease that were actually the main undercurrent. I agree with some of the suggestions already given and would advocate that you don't make your final decision based on one work experience.

However, I don't fault anyone who finds that they genuinely dislike nursing and/or who feel "this" isn't they thought it would be and aren't able to be okay with what it is. You're very young, and while on the one hand that means that you should should be sure you know yourself enough to know what you want before making big decisions, it also means that you have plenty of time to refocus (and the income to help facilitate that if it's what you choose). But be sure that it's nursing you don't like before taking leaps.

Good luck to you ~

Hello "a very sad young RN."

An RN license provides a lot of flexibility if you are willing to do your homework and experiment. Some people think hospital or nursing homes are the only way to go, but then there's home health, hospice, and other choices.

I've found that hospice provides a lot of work-life balance without a lot of the pressures I felt at the hospital working with UNSAFE patient ratios on a regular basis. Consider your options, do some homework, and don't feel stuck.

I didn't like nursing already when I was a nursing student. I didn't quit nursing school because I worked so hard to get in to the program. I didn't wanna waste my hard work.

I have been a nurse for about three years (one year of med surg and two years of OR). I don't like nursing still. I cannot see myself doing this job for the next thirty years. I am actually quitting nursing half way. That is, I currently work just 0.5 FTE and take some classes at a local college to get a master's degree in non-nursing. I am really happy that I finally became a part timer for work because being a part timer made my quality of life much better.

I feel majority of nursing jobs are too stressful physically or/and mentally. I was really not happy when I was working especially in med surg. I could not see anything good about nursing. But now I can see something good about nursing. It's flexibility. I can work just part time and go to school (part time) without taking out loans.

If you wanna quit your job right away, you'd better not make the decision quickly. You may wanna be part time instead, so you have more time taking care of yourself and thinking about your future. I have seen a nurse who was stressed out made a decision to quit way too quickly and she regretted.

hey! Your situation sounds a lot like mine. I, too, started disliking nursing school while in school but finished anyway. I am considering switching to the OR, but was wondering if maybe in fact I should move towards more non-nursing. Could we maybe talk?

Not much left to say after so many excellent replies but I do want to reinforce one comment.

Someone mentioned working nights might be an issue (if you are). For me, nights were absolutely horrible!! At the time, I didn't realize it was the shift but I became terribly depressed, hated nursing and everything about it. Resented having to work weekends, holidays. Of course, at the time, I also resented breathing, food...you name it. I was gaining weight but hardly eating. Exhausted all the time. Felt like I was in a fog. As soon as I quit that job and took a day shift, my attitude changed a 1000%. I'm just one of those whose circadian cycle will never adjust. Just something to think about.

So sorry you are feeling burnt and upset,been there,please try another hospital and a different area before you give it all up.Over the years I was able to adapt mycareer with family and nights ,holidays and weekends,as your seniority increases so will your schedule choices.As you mention family ,keep in mind that most families are not intact forever,and in nursing you have the option to make enough to support yourself and family and add some extra hours if the need arose.Always prepare for future,one never knows what can happen.I know many nurses that are the sole support of their families. Think it over ,good luck to you.It is a hard profession ,but it has some rewards.

Hi Everyone,

i just need to vent and I need someone to talk to me. I'm just feeling very upset right now and I want out of nursing..

I graduated with my associates a year and a half ago and have been practicing as a RN for about a year now and I absolutely hate it.

I work on an observation floor and everyone's super helpful but I'm starting to just dread coming into work and that's never happened before.

I'm 22 years old and I'm starting to realize what I want out of life and it's becoming more and more clear that it's not this. I'm starting to realize that I want a family and nursing is far from friendly hours. I don't want to be working on holidays, weekends, or especially nights. I know some parents make it work but I don't want to be one of those people.

im starting to resent people and I've never been like that before. I have no patience anymore and I'm just burnt out.

Ultimately, I just feel like a failure. I went to school for something that I thought I would absolutely love. I thought I wanted this. I worked so hard for my RN and I'm giving it all up.

I'm sorry for ranting and I know that these paragraphs don't flow easily... I'm just blurting out all my feelings at this point..

The sad thing is, I don't think I'll be good at anything else. I'm not sure what else id do if I wasn't a nurse.

How do I tell my family and especially my boyfriend that I love so very much that it's not for me without looking like a huge failure? I also don't want my partner to leave me over it.

What should I do?

Sincerely,

a very sad young RN

It sounds as though you're very stressed right now. I agree with those who've advised you to not make any impulsive decisions.

The reason for my post, though, is that I'm wondering if other life factors aren't contributing to your distress.

I'm especially concerned about your statement, "I also don't want my partner to leave me over it."

What loving partner would leave someone over a career change? From my own life experience, I'm going to go out on a limb and say you have another problem unrelated to your job as a nurse causing you stress.

As an older woman who's been there, done that at one time, don't let fear of abandonment rule your life. Anyone who would leave you over this issue isn't worthy of being your partner. My 3 cents worth on that...

On a note of encouragement, you'll be okay whatever you decide. (Just decide carefully and on your own terms.) An associate's degree and 1.5 years of work isn't quite the same investment of time and money as say an MD or PhD in astrophysics would be. You are young, and if (not saying you should or should not) you choose another career path it's not that big a deal in the grand scheme of things. I changed careers in my early 40's, requiring new bachelor's and graduate degrees, and am now happily retired after 25 years in the new career.

Best to you and God bless...

If the schedule is what you hate....work in clinic! Forget the hospitals! I've never worked in hospitals as an RN for that reason. Weekends and evenings, no thank you. I have two babies at home. I work Mon-Thurs 8:30-5:00pm for the last 2.5 years in an OBGYN clinic and I love it!

I really would recommend clinic, its a whole new world.

Nursing hours are AWESOME for having small children!! I feel like a stay at home mom even on the weeks I work full time because I'm still home so often and get to take them to school and be present for things. And you don't work EVERY holiday. Most places rotate the big holidays, so yeah, this year you'll work Christmas but next year you won't.