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mariawong86 mariawong86 (New Member) New Member

Sexually harassed during clinicals by a male nurse

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Hi guys so i wanted to share with you guys this that i haven't even been able to share with my friends or family because im embarrassed to do so and i feel like maybe you guys as future nurses or nurses can hear me vent and maybe share your stories if something similar happened to you .

forgive me if my writing is not perfect ( English is my second language )

It happened a Saturday morning at 7:30 am after the teacher assign each of us to the nurses on the floor . The morning routine is to check vitals and give medications . I usually get assigned to a charge nurse or a older one because so this was the second time i worked with this male nurse ( married man in his 40 ,s ). We went to the room of an elderly patient ( 80 ) she was not mentally there and needed her medications , He started asking me if i was single , about family and stuff and told me about his family , the first thing he did was to touch my hair and say wow you have beautiful hair while i was trying to draw some medication from a syringe ( i felt uncomfortable but i was concentrated on what i was doing ) and just says thanks . After that we went to another patients rooms and he said oh i forgot to hang fluids for the lady we just saw ...after a while we went back to the room and told me to hang the bag ( he touched my hand and said you have smooth hands do you have them ? do you shave everything in you body ... but i didn't answer because i noticed that we were completely alone in the room and though to myself i can believe this is happening to me . One of the CNA walked in THANK GOD and he stopped and we went outside he started asking me medication questions until i got one wrong and he said when you get one wrong you owe me something ...at this point i excused myself to the bathroom in panic and called the teacher and the students . My teacher acted right away while my classmates for some reason found the situation funny .. a report was made and the Male nurse got fired . sorry for the long story but i just wanted to let all the girls here to speak up because i believe im not the only one .

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And guys too. Nursing units are a very common place for sexual harassment towards us because it's so female dominated. Remember, it doesn't have to be limited to stories like the OP.

Also, making you solely responsible for the heavy lifting "because you're a man" involves tons of discrimination issues that can possibly be made into a sexual harassment case. To get the job, those girls have to be able to lift the same patients as you. They can do it too, they have to, there isn't always going to be a guy around. It's not solely your job because you're a man.

On a nursing unit, we're like the women at a construction site. Stand up for yourself, or you can get walked on very easily.

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And guys too. Nursing units are a very common place for sexual harassment towards us because it's so female dominated. Remember, it doesn't have to be limited to stories like the OP.

Also, making you solely responsible for the heavy lifting "because you're a man" involves tons of discrimination issues that can possibly be made into a sexual harassment case. To get the job, those girls have to be able to lift the same patients as you. They can do it too, they have to, there isn't always going to be a guy around. It's not solely your job because you're a man.

On a nursing unit, we're like the women at a construction site. Stand up for yourself, or you can get walked on very easily.

Way to minimize the OP's issue. I understand that sexual harassment can happen to anyone, including men. But I don't believe that preaching this is what the OP needed to hear.

OP: I'm so sorry this happened to you. I am a survivor of sexual assault and I understand how traumatizing experiences like this can be. Please, message me if you need anything, I am here for you.

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Way to minimize the OP's issue. I understand that sexual harassment can happen to anyone, including men. But I don't believe that preaching this is what the OP needed to hear.

OP: I'm so sorry this happened to you. I am a survivor of sexual assault and I understand how traumatizing experiences like this can be. Please, message me if you need anything, I am here for you.

The thread is literally using her personal story to tell women to stand up against sexual harassment.

Pointing out that men need to do it too fits with the point of her thread. She wasn't looking for sympathy, she was making a point.

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Sorry that you had to go through that. Me, I'd have a huge bill from a doctor after whacking the crap out of him!

Some men do experience sexual harrasssment from women, and it's just not in nursing. Some women will say, "oh, but men love that". That's as assinine as thinking that women love it. We all need to be aware of what we say and body language. I think it's ok to tell someone "you look nice today, I love that (insert article of clothing)." As long as you're not using voice and body innuendo to state a sexual context it's fine. Most of us are adult enough to know the difference, either as the giver or the receiver of the complement. For those who aren't, proceed with caution.

Touching body parts as in this case, along with comments, definitely crossed the line!

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So sorry you went through this, OP. I am glad to hear you spoke up and reported this person, who had likely done the same thing to others.

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Coming from a male that has experienced sexual harrasment the best thing to do is exactly what you did. I'd recommend seeing a professional and sitting down and talk to them. It's a shame that your class mates found humor in this, and its even more of a shame that it happened.. But dont let it keep you down, not all men are like that.. In fact, most men aren't like that.

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The thread is literally using her personal story to tell women to stand up against sexual harassment.

Yeah, and good for her. You say this as if it's a bad thing.

Pointing out that men need to do it too fits with the point of her thread. She wasn't looking for sympathy, she was making a point.

Except that's NOT what this post was about, so stop trying to minimize what happened to the OP like it's not a big deal just because stuff like this happens to men too. Of course it happens to men too and that's never OK. But this post was about her own personal experience. If you feel victimized as a male nurse, then by all means start your own thread. Certainly sexual harassment of male nurses is worthy of a discussion all on its own. I assure you that I will be there to support it, but not when you come on here trying to invalidate someone else's experience.

Edited by Shanimal

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Except that's NOT what this post was about, so stop trying to minimize what happened to the OP like it's not a big deal just because stuff like this happens to men too.

Must have taken some huge skill to make it through school with no reading comprehension skills, at all.

To quote the OP: "sorry for the long story but i just wanted to let all the girls here to speak up because i believe im not the only one"

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Must have taken some huge skill to make it through school with no reading comprehension skills, at all.

To quote the OP: "sorry for the long story but i just wanted to let all the girls here to speak up because i believe im not the only one"

Wow, must have been hard to make it through life being so insensitive to issues of others. By making a statement about how males also get sexually harrasses, you are minimizing the OPs experience. Now, please, go make a thread about male sexual harassment and I will support you 100%. But this is not the place.

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Must have taken some huge skill to make it through school with no reading comprehension skills, at all.

I'm not surprised you've resorted to personal attacks. I'll keep an eye out for your own thread about sexual harassment of male nurses. Have a nice day.

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