Scared I will lose my job :-(

lhflanurseNP, APRN · Aug 28, 2013

You recent bouts of "sickness" are most likely related to the stress. Did you have a formal orientation with one or two preceptors? If not, then they are doing you a disservice. If this is a brand new specialty unit, everyone else is under stress too much less adding a new nurse to the soup pot. It may just be that there is a LOT of stress in the unit and management is not working with this unit.

passionateaboutlife · Aug 28, 2013

You recent bouts of "sickness" are most likely related to the stress. Did you have a formal orientation with one or two preceptors? If not then they are doing you a disservice. If this is a brand new specialty unit, everyone else is under stress too much less adding a new nurse to the soup pot. It may just be that there is a LOT of stress in the unit and management is not working with this unit.[/quote']
Thank you for responding to my post. You are right, the sickness is brought on by stress and anxiety.
I just don't know what to say at the meeting tomorrow, as feel if I mention what I heard the previous nurse saying about me, to them it will sound like bad excuses!!
It is a new speciality to me, the others have worked there for years.
My preceptor has been away, have not yet me her. However have had other preceptors if you can call them that, but some just let me observe instead of doing things, because they don't like anyone else touching their charts??!!
Off to work soon and bet I will have an awful shift as wonder what will happen in the morning at the meeting.
Hate feeling anxious, and having this horrible palpitations.
Once again thank you xxx

Anna Flaxis, BSN, RN · Aug 28, 2013

I'm sorry you're going through this. I can never understand why people are less than welcoming with new people. It does not benefit the unit at all to engage in the cold shoulder treatment for new folks.

I think if you can explain the difficulty you've been having without sounding victim-y or like you're making lame excuses, you might be able to get better support for yourself.

But, be careful about the language you use. These folks have worked here a long time, and you don't know who is best friends with who. The nurse with the most awful attitude toward you could have grown up on the same street with that manager you're talking to. They could have gone to high school together and even had their babies at the same time, and every weekend they have BBQs and play mahjong or something.

So, be professional in your conduct. Don't play the victim or the blame game. If this is a union shop, you should have your union rep present at this meeting.

lhflanurseNP, APRN · Aug 28, 2013

"It is a new speciality to me, the others have worked there for years"---Oh, I misunderstood. It is always difficult when a new nurse comes on board. Sometimes nurses feel threatened because they have not been following P&P, and now they are under scrutiny. They could also feel overburdened because they aren't comfortable precepting. More often than not, when people are "aggressive", they are hiding their own inadequacies.

"My preceptor has been away, have not yet me her"---this has been a disservice to you. As Stargazer notes, you don't know who is buddy with whom, so you don't want to bring up anything negative. It would be wise to tell them how excited you are about working in this unit and that you know you have not caught on as quickly as you would like. You can bring up the fact that your preceptor has been gone and you would love the opportunity to work with her. I am surprised that they would start you when the preceptor was gone, but I am sure HR had no idea. The manager should have notified them when your name came across her desk for another orientation time.

Be professional, lay no blame, just let them know you really want to work there and is there anyway possible to "restart" on better footing.

passionateaboutlife · Aug 28, 2013

"It is a new speciality to me, the others have worked there for years"---Oh, I misunderstood. It is always difficult when a new nurse comes on board. Sometimes nurses feel threatened because they have not been following P&P, and now they are under scrutiny. They could also feel overburdened because they aren't comfortable precepting. More often than not, when people are "aggressive", they are hiding their own inadequacies.
"My preceptor has been away, have not yet me her"---this has been a disservice to you. As Stargazer notes, you don't know who is buddy with whom, so you don't want to bring up anything negative. It would be wise to tell them how excited you are about working in this unit and that you know you have not caught on as quickly as you would like. You can bring up the fact that your preceptor has been gone and you would love the opportunity to work with her. I am surprised that they would start you when the preceptor was gone, but I am sure HR had no idea. The manager should have notified them when your name came across her desk for another orientation time.
Be professional, lay no blame, just let them know you really want to work there and is there anyway possible to "restart" on better footing.

Thank you so so much for taking the time, to give me such valuable feedback.

I've just cried my eyes out on my drive to work and now that I have arrived, feel scared, nervous and anxious.

I will let you know how the meeting went tomorrow.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart x

GreenApplesauce · Aug 28, 2013

I know how you feel. I once did not eat for 2 days because of my new job. I go for walks and vent to my friends and family who are nurses. They tell me what is going on at their job as well.

Everyone likes me on my unit...except for my supervisor. This is what I do:

a)Always smile

b)bring in sweets every once in a while

c)Compliment people

d)always keep an innocent sweet looking face, no matter what

e)massage people's egos. Listen to their rants...but never rant myself

f)ask questions from other nurses and really value their in put...or at least act like I do.

g)if someone is rude to me or yells at me, I let it go and don't hold grudges. You cannot afford to in nursing, you wont survive. Just act like it never happened. It is high stress in the hospital and everyone is liable to be a d-bag at some point.

The other day a HOC yelled at me over the phone over something so small. I was ticked for a second...to busy on my floor to have emotions...I just had to keep moving. A few days later she brought in some organic vegetables from her garden and gave me a zucchini :), if I had taken a grudge over her un-called for rudeness I would be on edge around her and would not have gotten that awesome zucchini, lol.

We are cool now and she helps me out as do other doctors and nurses, even the ones that have been mean to me. You just have to let things go and keep it moving...don't act like you noticed.

Unless they are in your face about it...just let it go and keep moving. Focus on getting better. Get yours. Be nice and coy and non-threatening. If you stick it out they will start to like you.

My case is different...I am dealing with management that may be out to get me. We will see...

HeatherGurl84 · Aug 28, 2013

I honestly think a lot of nurses forget that they were once "newbies", and they act like they came right out of nursing school as god's gift to the nursing profession. God forbid you ever ask a question..... :bag:

In your meeting, be honest!! Address your concerns and like was already said, be careful who you share things with. You never know who they are linked to. I wouldn't even bring up the "talk" you heard. Ignore the drama!! I am so sorry you are dealing with such stress.

Be strong!!