Rude and crude RN

[Thunderwolf, MSN, RN]

I'm an RN and I'm male. I have a colleague who is the same, but is very crude regarding his comments regarding women...making comments on their anatomy and what their private genitalia must look like as he salivates over his own personal images. Really, I find it rather disgusting. I try to chalk it up as that he is about 20 years younger than I am. Personally, I don't believe comments like his belong in our type of work environment, more appropriate at a construction site. To be honest, I wouldn't trust him around my 13 yr old daughter for fear of "checking her out". One day, when he salivated over his images, eyes glassing over, of what a 15/16 yr old female visitor's "pubic hair color must be...", I turned to him and said, "How old are you?" ....hoping that this comment would jar him out of this adolescent trance (by the way, he is in his mid twenties), he turned to me and said, "Aren't you man? Don't you get urges?" I didn't even comment. I keep my urges to myself. The other nurses, female, know how this RN is, but accept it by acknowledging that he is digusting and "that is just who he is" because he is a good nurse otherwise in his skills and rapport with the docs, especially the docs who like to talk the same. Am I a prude or what?

[Katnip, RN]

You are not a prude at all. His behavior is inappropriate and unprofessional, not to mention disgusting.

I don't care how good a nurse he may be, to me he seems to be a potential time-bomb before he acts on some of his fantasies. My father used to talk like that to people and he was sexually abusing me.

Talk to your DON or NM. This guy needs to be watched carefully.

[hypnotic_nurse]

Euwwww. I hope he is not working in an area where he has to do peri care or works with emotionally vulnerable women.

I'd report him, these comments are way out of line. He sounds like a pervert in the making if he's not already there.

He's stepped over the line, IMHO, and it's nothing but a slippery slope from here on out.

[NurseGuy_in_06]

It is not "prudish" to want to be a professional and work in a professional atmosphere. I am a male nursing student and would not want to hear locker room talk in my place of work. It is obvious that your colleague was never taught to respect other people, especially women. I would not want my 2 sons to talk that way. Just watch out that you are not found guilty of the same thing "by association".

[CCU NRS]

I don't think so. I would probably just tell him to keep it to himself. When I first started nursing I worked with a gay male that was like this and he would make comments about visiting males, checking their orifice etc. I just told him I have nothing against you or your sexual orientation but what you are doing is inappropriate in the work place. He sort of bashed me for a while saying I was Homophobic etc. I just told him I would say the same thing to a guy that was checking out female visitors and making crude comments. He was eventually asked to leave after offending several visitors, he was not even discrete about his observations, like you mentioned it was like you imagine a construction site to be.

I am male as well

[SmilingBluEyes]

I would consider his behavior sexual harassment and tell him so, and then request he stop it immediately. If he did continue despite my request to stop the behavior, would take it up the chain as a sexual harassment complaint. Simple as that. Because that is what it is. Harassment.

[meownsmile, BSN, RN]

I agree this chatter has no place in the halls of healthcare. But I have heard female nurses be just about as crude and rude on occasion regarding patients various body parts. I think they all need to grow up and remember where they are. Maybe they all need to go back and retake their psyc/mental health classes again because i think they missed some or were stunted in an important stage of thier own growth and development.

[SmilingBluEyes]

Yep, it is true, men and women can be guilty. That is why I consider it so important to call it what it is, and bring a stop to it. Most people with a grain of intelligence will get the point and quit when asked to.

[Maggie in NC]

what's prudish about having an ethical, professional, and moral standard?

by not speaking out, you are tolerating it, and could appear to condone it. someone needs to explain sexual harassment laws to him. next time he does that stuff, turn to him and say, "not here, not ever". that guy is an hr issue waiting to happen. his comments can be considered sexual harassment by anyone who takes offense. you don't have to be a woman to be offended by his remarks. there is no appropriate place for that kind of disgusting perverted talk. it demeans the professional image nurses should always have!

we used to have a saying when that stuff happened at my old job-raise your hand palm facing the offender and say, "not here, not ever".

[RN_2007]

I agree with the above posters that you should report him. Most facilities have no tolerance policies against sexual behavior/harassment. It seems to me like he's destracting in your work environment. So the best thing for you to do is report him.

[Thunderwolf, MSN, RN]

I'm glad to see that others feel the same. I'd like for any and all who view this post to comment on this if you would. I'd like to hear from the "guys" as well.

[nursemary9, BSN, RN]

Thunderwolf,

You are definitely not a prude!!

This is most Unprofessional behavior and Inappropriate behavior!!

You must talk with someone about him. as others have said, by not doing this you may be condoning it. I would certainly mention it to my manager & if nothing happens, take it up the chain of command.Everyone else has all ready said it better than I, but I just wanted to give you SUPPORT!!

I have worked for many years as a staff nurse with male & female nurses, Gay and Straight nurses and no one has ever been this inappropriate.

This kind of person gives all nurses a bad name & a bad image!!

Mary Ann