Regretting becoming a nurse

NurseOnAMotorcycle, ASN, RN · Jan 30, 2015

You are in the disillusionment phase of becoming a "real" nurse. You've been a nurse for 3/4 of a year. All of the perfect world "nurses are merciful angels to the scared and sick" have worn off, real life nursing is setting in with all of the frustrating and scary challenges. Believe it or not, this is good and will definitely pass. :up:

The next (and sometimes concurrent) phase is that pessimistic view of the patients and families where you feel like they are all trying to take everything they can get whether attention, drugs, whatever. That passes too. After a bit longer, things even back out and you are a wiser, more practical nurse who sees more than just black and white. You will be able to see the in between colors, too.

Hopefully you've already survived your first med error. That one usually keeps people awake or having night terrors for a few days. Maybe you've had it out with a coworker for the first time. That also usually goes away after a few days.

Everything that you are doing on the step down unit from interpersonal relations with coworkers or patients to the nursing/medical knowledge you pick up is turning you into a better nurse. :snurse:

And for heaven's sake, look how far you have already come!! Do you remember your first school clinical? Your first day on the floor? Look at how comfortable you have already gotten with basic nursing care and more advanced nursing care?

Take a second and go to the student discussions and help a few of them along. You'll feel better about yourself and really help someone who needs it. :geek:

ICURN3020 · Jan 30, 2015

I honestly felt the same way for the first year or so after I began working. I thought, "What in the world was I thinking, picking this career?!?". I felt very similar to the way you explain...anxiety-ridden at work and couldn't even enjoy my time off because I would do nothing but dread going back and the panic would rise the closer my next shift got.

Do you mind elaborating on what it is you dislike about your job? Many of us seem to have a very difficult start, but usually the kinks get worked out and before you realize it, you're comfortable with your coworkers and duties and actually find yourself enjoying it.

Nursing is notorious for being a challenging work environment. Add in all the various personalities and communication problems and it can be overwhelmingly frustrating.

montinurse, BSN · Jan 30, 2015

Wonderful replies-welcome to nursing :) I've had different times in my career (especially the first in the hospital) that I've felt that way. The previous posters were so right. My first med/surg job (I lasted 9 months) was awful, it was a small, clicky hospital. For some reason, they hated me and I hated them, no matter how nice I tried to be.

In the stressful world of nursing, you may need to search inside of yourself, meditate, take a break, read about other specialties to help understand what you're feeling. Don't focus on the negative. Put that energy to positive thinking, you can and will get through it. Believe me, I've worked on both sides, office and hospital, and I'd much rather do bedside hospital nursing. 12 hours, you're done. In the office, it's stress in a whole new way, all day, every day, and much lower pay.

Have you considered a different part of the hospital? I'm an ICU nurse who's taken care of MANY "step-down" patients, and I can empathize with you, they can be royal pains in the rear. It's frustrating. What you feel is normal.

I've felt that I couldn't possibly do one more day of patient care, try to educate someone who refuses to take care of themselves, have felt inadequate for not being able to pass all my meds on time, chart all that nursing care I've given, missed replacing lytes and the night shift is grouchy at shift change, etc

You need a good release. Try going to GomerBlog - Earth's Finest Medical Satire News Site for a little sarcastic medical humor. We all don't love what we do all the time. That means you're human :) Good luck and feel better soon!

Libby1987 · Jan 31, 2015

Office job? As in clerical?

What part of the job do you hate?

MA Nurse · Jan 31, 2015

When I was in school I knew I couldnt work with adults so I started in NICU right away. ive been in nicu 25 yrs now. have you thought of taking care of babies or children?

Gooselady, BSN, RN · Jan 31, 2015

Sometimes I can't believe I made it this far, because I remember feeling EXACTLY like you in my first job, in that first year. We aren't saying 'oh, you silly, get over yourself', we're saying yep, this is so common it must be part of becoming a nurse in the real world.

It may NOT be 'nursing' that you hate at all. There are so many kinds of nursing out there, and now that you have close to a year of experience, you can start looking around for a different specialty. What kind of nursing got you interested in becoming a nurse?

I've had episodes where I was SO fried from the anxiety and stress that there wasn't a kind of nursing on the planet that remotely appealed to me. I was ready to work at Starbucks and I'll admit it, I even applied. But it was more a frame of mind, rather than the reality of nursing itself. I went on to really, truly enjoy two jobs and detest at least one more. Nursing environments vary like that. You can have your 'dream job' and be stuck with a staff with terrible morale and a joke for management, or a job you never thought you'd enjoy at ALL, with great coworkers and management.

Is there any way you can talk to someone neutral, like an EAP or counselor, just to get some of this 'stuff' out? Your anxiety level is, unfortunately, rather normal but STILL, you shouldn't have to live like that.

Don't give up on nursing -- and there's nothing wrong with giving up on this particular job. Maybe you just need to give yourself permission to begin looking around. If you could lighten up your overall 'attitude' (and I do NOT mean this in a negative way!) by talking to an EAP or counselor, I think you'll see a lot more options for yourself than you do right now. Good luck, and yeah, welcome to nursing :)

Rod, Male Nurse · Jan 31, 2015

This isn't uncommon. I did this the first 6 months I was on my own as a nurse. Part of it was the stressful environment and I left everyday with stress headaches. I had dreams (or nightmares) about taking care of patients and pulled my hair out wondering I I had missed anything and worried I would get yelled at by other nurses.

It was all anxiety but eventually the newness if it all wore off and it wasn't so bad. Some days still suck tremendously...but I can do anything aside from hold my breath for 12 hours. I work 3-12s and rarely have more than one stressful night each week. I wanted out of bedside nursing so bad at one time but I changed facilities and that has made all the difference.

You might possibly be in the wrong facility. Every hospital is different and may cause you to feel differently.

JWG223 · Jan 31, 2015

I know a lot of people who didn't know what being a nurse entailed when they got in. I saw a lot of this. My advice? You know it's not for you, but in the mean time, you have bills to pay and people to look after, so here are my tips:

-Do your best.

-Make a good-faith effort to treat others as you want to be treated.

-Don't worry about the rest. Noone is perfect, we all make mistakes, and if you are doing your very best, you can't do anymore, so when you go home----forget about it. Work is work, home is home. Keep the two SEPARATE!

forgivenfaith119 · Jan 31, 2015

I agree with the other posters.

The way I was able to get out of the hospital setting is I took PRN positions at hospice and home health. Now I have a FT job in case management.

NurseOnAMotorcycle, ASN, RN · Jan 31, 2015

... and pulled my hair out wondering ...

Is that why it's so short in your avatar? :roflmao:

PnutButterJelly · Feb 1, 2015

I felt this way too! I am coming up on my second year of being a nurse and it is sooo much better. For me, it involved getting out of a horrible job with even worse coworkers. I was depressed and cried most days. I finally made a decision to quit by a certain day regardless of if I found new employment. Luckily I hit the job lottery and was hired for the best job ever before I reached the "quit" date. I seriously thank heavens for my job almost every day. So my advice to you is this--remember why you wanted to be a nurse, get your resume out there, and try a new position!