will I be neglecting my child?

lisabeth · Sep 10, 2006

The pre-requisites are draining, but I dont think you need to worry too much about neglect until you get into the program. I have heard so many nursing students say they told their family they would see them in May. I fear that myself. I dont guess I have to worry too much until I get in. I am in my last semester of pre-requisites, but that still doesnt mean I will get in.

allnurses Guide · Sep 10, 2006

If it was me, I might not start working until they were in school. Those preschool years were priceless to me. But let me tell you, the worry doesn't go away when they're older.
There have been class days when I and another Mom of about the same age have cried in the hall because we were away from our kids. Yet both of our preteen children are doing great, and we will have jobs that will provide for them, we will show them the value of hard work and perseverance, and we will feel better about ourselves for following our dreams. When we love ourselves, its easier for them to love and be proud of us.

I waited until my youngest was in first grade to apply to nursing school - I took a class here and there. I was luckier as I had been to college before I had children and was not married, majoring in Social Work and so had most of my pre-reqs except the science classes. My mom lived with us at the time and that was a great help as I wouldn't have put my kids in daycare.

I will say that my #2 son was just starting junior high and I do have some regrets about being away so much because right about that time there were some signs that would have pointed us to risks . . . ones that he ended up taking in high school, which of course broke my heart.

Each age has it's own special needs and challenges. And we all feel guilt.

Of course the ideal is to get your education before marriage and kids.

However, the ideal is not always feasible.

steph

Sally12 · Sep 10, 2006

My two are now 21 and 25. I waited until they were both in school but then, worked too many hours. If your priorities are not right, or if you do not listen to your inner voice you will be sorry. I am glad I waited, but am sorry I worked over 32-36 hours a week to BUY the things everyone else had. That is not what the good life or "better life" is about. It is about knowing there is someone in your house waiting for you. If you have spouse, that is a plus.

allnurses Guide · Sep 10, 2006

My two are now 21 and 25. I waited until they were both in school but then, worked too many hours. If your priorities are not right, or if you do not listen to your inner voice you will be sorry. I am glad I waited, but am sorry I worked over 32-36 hours a week to BUY the things everyone else had. That is not what the good life or "better life" is about. It is about knowing there is someone in your house waiting for you. If you have spouse, that is a plus.

Initially I worked too much too - I only work part-time now. You are right - "things" don't make a better life. Time with each other does.

My kids are 23, 21, 17 and 5 . . . . I'm savoring the time I have with my youngest and realizing that it was not that long ago that my older kids were his age. I miss those little guys.

steph

Sally12 · Sep 10, 2006

Your children will NOT learn about hard work. They will learn that buying things is more important than you being there for them. They will be social because they feel strength because Mom is home "being there" and they have a place to go if they need to.

prinsessa · Sep 10, 2006

I have been going to school on and off since my DD has been 2. She is now 8 and we now have a 3-year-old son. It doesn't get easier no matter what age they are. My DD is the one who says she doesn't want me to go to school. I would rather go to school now though then when she is a teen. I think kids sometimes need their parents attention even more when they are teens. I know I did.

My mom went back to school when I was younger. It was hard at times, but it showed me that it is never too late to follow your dreams. Many of my friends have given up on school after having kids (the ones who have kids and didn't finish school before). Instead they have to work jobs they don't like and don't get paid much either.

I might be really busy sometimes during the semester and not have much time to play with my kids, but I make up for it other times. I also schedule things for them to do while I am studying so they stay busy themselves. Plus I try to do the majority of my studying when they are sleeping. Good luck!