I want to become a nurse but my husband says I will be always sick and unhappy

Students Pre-Nursing

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So, I am 30 years old. I have been thinking about becoming a nurse for a long time but haven't done it yet. I have a first degree oversees not related to medicine and right now I work with my husband in our business but I am considering a career as nurse. My husband strongly against it. He tells me that I always will be sick with all kind of illnesses and I think he tries to protect both of us from it. We only been sick once in four years that we live together with cold that I caught from a customer. But my husband haven't been sick for over 10 years and he is very cautious to the point that he doesn't shake hands and he use napkins to open doors (that's an example how cautious he is). He also tells me that I am not gonna be happy, that all nurses are miserable.

How often do you get sick and do your spouses become ill too?

We are very intimate so whatever I will have he will get too instantly.

Ruby Vee, BSN

17 Articles; 14,030 Posts

Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.

In my forty years of nursing, I haven't been sick nearly as often as any of the parents of young children who seem to get everything that goes around.

One of the first things that I learned in nursing school, was that hand washing is the best way to prevent the spread of disease. If you wash your hands, and wear gloves youre going to be fine.

NICU Guy, BSN, RN

4,161 Posts

Specializes in NICU.

Your husband sounds like a germaphobe. He thinking that with all the germs in the hospital that you would be constantly sick and bring it home to him.

I get the typical cold every winter, but I could catch it from anywhere. Hospital is not the only place that has germs. I work at a children's hospital so you would think that I would always be sick, but that is not the case. My wife has never caught anything from me or my clothes. You just need to follow good hand hygiene. Always use hand sanitizer before and after patient contact.

verene, MSN

1,790 Posts

Specializes in mental health / psychiatic nursing.

I get sick far less often working in healthcare than I ever did with my office job. I think being surrounded by people who wash their hands all the time and washing my own hands all the time has a lot to do with it.

What is more concerning is your husbands total lack of support. Nursing school can be rough for many people, and either having minimal support at home, or having your family actively work against your goals makes it that much more challenging. I'd want to dig deeper into his concerns around illness and negativity towards health care.

Wiggly Litchi

476 Posts

I work in healthcare and my fiance works in healthcare and we're both hardly ever sick.

Practice good hand hygiene, use your PPE at the appropriate times, and don't let a germaphobe put you off something that you may enjoy ;)

allnurses Guide

nursel56

7,078 Posts

Specializes in Peds/outpatient FP,derm,allergy/private duty.

Not every patient has an infectious disease, but even when I worked in pediatrics I rarely got sick. Your average grocery cart or seats on public transportation pose a much greater threat to me.

It sounds like your husband simply is uninformed about the life of an average nurse, and seems to have a higher than normal degree of anxiety and obsessive compulsive-tendencies.

OsceanSN2018

224 Posts

I have undiagnosed OCD, so I wash my hands at least 15-20 times a day (or more). I hate germs, and I dont like to touch anything that most people have touch. However, it has never stopped me being in nursing school. I just follow standard precautions, and make sure that I wash my hands before and after I go and out of a patient's room.

With all that being said, I have never been sick ever since my OCD tendencies came about. I never got the common cold or anything (going on 2 1/2 years now), so I think this is a high correlation to my frequent hand hygiene. So, wash your hands and you'll be fine.

What is more concerning is your husbands total lack of support. Nursing school can be rough for many people, and either having minimal support at home, or having your family actively work against your goals makes it that much more challenging. I'd want to dig deeper into his concerns around illness and negativity towards health care.

verene is 100% correct, this is what's important. It could just be a misconception on my part but your husband does not seem like he is in favor on you returning to school. Or, is he in favor of you going back-just not going into nursing.

Mavrick, BSN, RN

1,578 Posts

Specializes in 15 years in ICU, 22 years in PACU.
Not every patient has an infectious disease, but even when I worked in pediatrics I rarely got sick. Your average grocery cart or seats on public transportation pose a much greater threat to me.

It sounds like your husband simply is uninformed about the life of an average nurse, and seems to have a higher than normal degree of anxiety and obsessive compulsive-tendencies.

Congratulations to you for seeking out a more informed source for the facts.

I'm not going to quote any statistics but based on my singular experience I don't get any sicker than my average non-nurse wife. I am on immunocompromising medication for rheumatoid arthritis so I get my mandatory flu shot, do my mandatory hand washing and wearing of PPEs.

I don't always get a cold a year but it's not unexpected and it's not that big a deal.

Specializes in Nephrology Home Therapies, Wound Care, Foot Care..

If you're getting sick all the time as a nurse, you're not following the precautions you'll learn in nursing school. If you've been thinking about being a nurse for "a long time", you deserve to go for it! And I know a few nurses who are miserable, and a few in every job who are miserable- that's a ridiculous blanket statement. Is it possible that your husband has a fear of you moving in circles outside one that includes the both of you?

Alex_RN, BSN

335 Posts

I have been a working RN for 3+ years and have never been sick except for a slight cough that everyone seems to have had a few weeks ago. Spouse has never gotten sick.

Nursing school is HARD. Harder than being a nurse. You need the support of your family and especially your husband. Can he cope with you studying literally all the time? You will study during family get togethers, during vacations, probably right before and after bedtime. Other things will not get done, like housework. My husband took over all the cooking and shopping plus we cooked at home less.

30 is young and you can have a lucrative and rewarding career if your heart is in it. Maybe work on your pre-reqs and see how that goes?

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