i made a comment to my coworker and he was offended. it was a meant as a harmless tease and just feel terrible about it. i knew something was wrong because my co worker sort of shut down. i asked twice what was wrong. finally today i asked again and he reminded me what it was i had done. here is the event:
i stayed over to draw a lab which had come in right at shift change. i dont like to leave things undone out of courtesy to the next shift. my co worker being nice said "hey i got this" i said, no i don't mind". he "go home, i got it" well i made a joke and "i said ok be a control freak". i was totally joking, but immediately wished i had not said it. well he walked off, i drew the lab. i found him and said i was just teasing and was sorry if it offended him. he said "no way , all is fine"
well i forgot about it. so much so that i did not even put it together. he had to remind me that was the issue. i apologized and believe me i was sincere. i told him it was meant to be funny but i see it was inappropriate and asked for him to please forgive me. he said he did but stressed that he would just want to communicate about work and patients from now on. i said of course and that i would never say anything like that again.
i can tell he is upset with me still and i don't blame him. i know i crossed the line, but i felt close enough to tease but i know i was wrong, i take responsibility and have learned something.
i believe that if he wants to stay standoffish and leery he can and i don't blame him. i just feel terrible about it. i know the best thing is just to let it go. i wont bother him again by bringing it up or trying to chit chat. i just fill like a dummy..
it helps just to write it down here. the sad part is he was the nicest guy to me, he encouraged me and taught me so much. i like him so well that is why i teased a little. but instead i hurt someone i really liked and appreciated.
i hope in time he forgives me and we can move past this. i am just sad about it. i wish i could have explained it better to him today, but i think he knows i am saddened and so sorry. thanks for listening and i would welcome any feedback
Specializes in Peds Urology,primary care, hem/onc.
I agree with the other posters....he seems a little oversensitive to me. I tend to be sarcastic and when I feel comfortable with people I can totally do what you did. For me, I would not have given it a second thought if you had said that to me. Since he was offended, you were sensitive to that and apologized. That should be the end of it and he really needs to get over it. If he keeps his panties in a wad about it, that is HIS deal, not yours and I would not lose any sleep about it. I wonder if his basic personality is a little passive agressive and he is enjoying seeing you squirm and fret about it. Sheesh...people need to lighten up!!!! Relax and don't worry about it anymore!!!
Wow he is overreacting for real, especially since you said you two were cool. Don't kiss his a$$, you apologized now he needs to be an adult and get over it.
If you offered to stay over and draw labs for me I would be thrilled! I would not have mad a big deal over a comment that was mad in a light hearted nature.
That's so lame… ask him if he needs a statlock to keep that stick up his as*!! lol I would be SO grateful if my co-worker stayed after shift to do something to help me out… I wouldn't bring it up again, just let it go. You did the right thing by apologizing and that's all you can do.
he said he did but stressed that he would just want to communicate about work and patients from now on.
honestly, i think that is probably for the best. he does not sound like a person who would be easy to be friends with. i would hate to pal around with someone if i had to walk on eggshells and worry about every little thing i said. just keep things professional, imo.
Specializes in Peds/outpatient FP,derm,allergy/private duty.
Man - when I think of some of the off-hand remarks I've made over the years ...:uhoh21: ... I think you inadvertently hit a button for this person based on his prior experiences with that issue.
I would just give it time. I wouldn't mention it again or tell him he's over-reacting. If you have been on good terms he will come to that realization on his own.
I believe this to be true and in my personal opinion, laughing is WAY more fun! 
rnsrgr8t
395 Posts
I agree with the other posters....he seems a little oversensitive to me. I tend to be sarcastic and when I feel comfortable with people I can totally do what you did. For me, I would not have given it a second thought if you had said that to me. Since he was offended, you were sensitive to that and apologized. That should be the end of it and he really needs to get over it. If he keeps his panties in a wad about it, that is HIS deal, not yours and I would not lose any sleep about it. I wonder if his basic personality is a little passive agressive and he is enjoying seeing you squirm and fret about it. Sheesh...people need to lighten up!!!! Relax and don't worry about it anymore!!!