Senior RN Student w/ Jealous Husband!!!

Students Student Assist

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Hello All!!!

I am tired of keeping this to myself and suffering alone.

Here is a little background, my husband has a history of both emotional and physical abuse. Whenever I stood up, he pushed me down by reminding me of my past ( which is very, very painful ).

Before I started nursing school a few years ago, I had a horrible bout with major depression; I had no plans but knew that I needed to support my three babies (which are teens now). As I got more education, he became even more jealous. As long as I was depressed and dependent, he was happy.

Now that I am graduating next week, he needs me to "appreciate and respect" him because now I am "high on a horse." Last year, my husband and I argued and he was yelling about how I couldn't pay bills or keep a job - for heaven's sake, I was attending Nursing School (BSN program, mind you).

I literally scratched a hole in my head due to anxiety. True story...

While I was in my Pediatric rotation, I needed a little kid to do developmental tests on. He bought me a baby from his "friend."

The next day, he sat in front of the family and introduced us to his daughter - which was the child that he bought to me for testing!!! I was in RAGE; not only because of his infidelity but the way he introduced the child (whose mother has 5 other children and has been calling and hanging up).

I AM getting tested!!!

I can go on forever with this story, but I just need advise. Not on how I should divorce this creep ... but that I am on Workers' comp and get pennies; I was injured picking up a patient.

I can not pay to take the NCLEX and I want to start my career and my LIFE!!! His income is greater than mine and I have no family here. It is a very painful period in my life - along with it being the happiest. I am the first in my entire family to get a degree.

I am so stressed I just need you guys!!! :crying2:

mmeadows75

5 Posts

I commend you for being so strong! Nursing school is tough as it is...having to deal with a hubby that is not on your team makes it all the more difficult! I am sorry that your going through this and not having a supportive husband. The good thing is your almost done and your life will change for the better, so keep your spirits up...God definetly has plans for you! Big hugs to you and stay focused!!!!

Erikadawn RN

504 Posts

You can only take it one day at a time. You have to find a way for your nclex, I would apply for a license in another state, get a p.o. box and send the license there. I would also consider going into the armed forces, because you could move with no notice to him. The abuse will get worse because he will think you can do it alone. You can, you have your children to support you. If they will tell Dad, then still leave, you have to take care of your self first.

caliotter3

38,333 Posts

I think you will be in a better position to make an appropriate choice once you are an RN with a job. After all, your situation is one of the reasons women with children go into nursing, to gain life choice options. Best wishes.

Sand_Dollar, BSN

1,130 Posts

Specializes in Critical Care, Clinical Documentation Specialist.

I'm sorry you are going through this. And, although I can't offer much in the way of advice, I want to offer my support, and my prayers. :hug:

Smith.C74

58 Posts

I want to congratulate you for making it this far in getting your RN. You deserve it. I can completely relate. Keep your goal in mind. You can do this. It's not just for you, but for your children. Getting your RN will be something that you'll never regret. Like others have said, it will give you freedom and choices that aren't there now. Don't be afraid to think creatively for a solution.

mommalumps

107 Posts

Thanks Ya'll for the heart felt words and HUGS!!! I am all alone here and I hope that my life takes a wonderful turn. Thank you!!!

***HUGE HUGS for ALL***

allnurses Guide

Nurse SMS, MSN, RN

6,843 Posts

Specializes in Critical Care; Cardiac; Professional Development.

Your best bet at this point in time is to get a lawyer. Good luck.

bambam1288

52 Posts

you are a strong person to have gone through that and sadly I can't offer advice. I wish you the best on your journey.

You would NOT be at this point if you weren't strong and smart. You have to FOCUS. I know that must be hard under the circmstances but it is happening to distract you from what you are trying to do. If he is hitting you then you should secure your safety first. And when I say first I mean move away from him and unpack after you pass the NCLEX. If you quit school he wins and you may never have a chance to get free again. And no matter how it seems right now he will PAY for every nasty thing he has done to you. I will be praying for you :)

Guest 360983

357 Posts

Look for a local women's shelter. They often have resources to help you get out and stand on your own feet.

mammac5

727 Posts

I have no clue how you've made it through this without any support. God bless you! Now that you're almost done with school and NCLEX, it's time to get your life straight. For me, that would mean getting out, getting to a shelter or to family/friends for help, getting an attorney for legal separation ASAP, and moving forward with your career and your desire to help others.

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