Jump to content

nursing school and marriage

Posted
by e_zapanta e_zapanta (New) New

im only 20 and my husband and i have only been married for two years. i heard lots of horror stories of nursing school and marriage and how both can be negatively affected. can anyone shed some light?

im only 20 and my husband and i have only been married for two years. i heard lots of horror stories of nursing school and marriage and how both can be negatively affected. can anyone shed some light?

I've survived it! It may take some juggling of your schedule but it really can work, especially if your husband is supportive. Make sure you have clear boundaries of when is study time and when is play time. Schedule date nights weekly and if budget is tight you can do fun free things together. Good luck

AprilRNhere

Specializes in RN- Med/surg.

Just keep working at it. Agree that no matter how bad it gets..you won't make any decisions until AFTER school. My marriage is completely different since I graduated.

pagandeva2000, LPN

Specializes in Community Health, Med-Surg, Home Health.

Nursing school is very time consuming. Many times, the students bond together because other people who are not in nursing programs don't always comprehend the uniqueness of being a nursing student and occasionally, this bonding may occur with people of the opposite sex. This doesn't mean that this becomes sexual--it is usually people who are in the same clinical groups study together, unwind after an exam and vent their frustrations. If a relationship is not strong, or if the partner does not work anywhere in the medical profession, it can be hard, but the strong and loyal survive.

My husband was extremely supportive. He already witnessed his sister's nursing school experience. It was VERY familiar to him, and he even knew more about anatomy, medication, etc because he remembered his sister's road. Plus he worked evenings and every other weekend, so this gave me plenty of time to study. The days he was off were dedicated to him.

I was married for 10 years before starting ns and my husband's aunt, a nurse practioner of 30+ years experience advised against it, citing some stats about how many marriages fail during ns. I told her we'd been through plenty together and we'd get through this together. I graduate in July with my husband at my side! It can be done.

As other posters noted, be aware that the relationships that you will form in school are intense. They are not your marriage, though. Keep it friendly, but professional. ALWAYS. I have seen it cross the line, people were hurt and children suffered.

Also, nursing school WILL change you. You will be probably be more assertive, more bookish, more analytical, less and more sensitive depending, and on and on. This will affect your marriage. But, hey, you will change regardless. You will not be the same person your spouse married and that is a good thing. These changes are called growth. Prepare your spouse and yourself and you both should be fine.

Not to sound negative, but I will be very, very lucky if mine survives it. However, I'm getting to that point where I don't care if it ends or not.

nghtfltguy, BSN, RN

Specializes in Emergency, Trauma, Flight.

i can shed some light~~

first off...

you are still a kid... you have been married since you were 18?

if you love your husband.. and he loves you... then you all will be just fine!!!

don't stress out about your marriage when you are starting nursing school girl...

stress out about it when you are getting major burn out after you have been a nurse for a long time.....

but even then....

don't stress............

deep breath...

you will be fine!

:cool:

Wendy_RN

Specializes in Telemetry, Med Surg, Pediatrics, ER.

If you have a strong relationship and a supportive spouse your marriage will survive. Just remember, nursing school does not last forever. Always make time for your husband. Even if you don't have an entire day to spend together, little moments make a difference.

nghtfltguy, BSN, RN

Specializes in Emergency, Trauma, Flight.

oh.... just to let ya know... i am an eternal optomist.........

i have never been married.........

nursing school should not mess you up...

if it does.... than i grant you permission to kick me in the face...

i have never ... ever granted anyone permission to do that before....

so.....i have faith in ya~

plz don't let me down....

gettin kicked in the face hurts!!

:cool:

My husband and I have been married for 4 years. We have a 2 year old son. He supports me 100%. I go to school at night, he takes care of the baby after work three days a week. He took a loan out from his retirement so I can stay home this semester from school since I was on unemployment. I am currently looking for a job at night the nights I dont have school, so that means he will be workings 5 days a week and then come home and take care of the baby. I feel guilty sometimes and it so stressful when you have everything riding on your husband. I always tell myself there is no way I can fail!!!! But so far I am doing great.......

I try to give at least one night a week for my husband and I do hang out together...watch a movie and just not stress......

If I get through this I owe it all to my husband......:redbeathe

Tweety, BSN, RN

Specializes in Med-Surg, Trauma, Ortho, Neuro, Cardiac. Has 28 years experience.

Nursing school for the married person is a family affair. He should support you, but also don't forget about him. Sometimes a "thank you for supporting me, I know it's tough right now because I'm so stressed and busy, but you mean a lot to me and I love you. Thanks for everything you do." will go a long way rather than "you don't understand the stress I'm under...nag nag nag!". :)

marriage is a joint effort

sometimes one has to put forth a little extra school is rough and i know he can step up to the plate when needed

Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.