Tips For Surviving College

  1. * Minimize food budget by scheduling classes around Happy Hour.

    * Enjoy being a Sophomore -- It will be the best three years of your life.

    * Wear an athletic cup to panty raids, because it's all fun and games until someone loses their 'nads.

    * Lemon juice and baking soda make an excellent bong water stain remover.

    * Earn extra cash by parlaying chemistry knowledge into lucrative "home pharmaceuticals" business.

    * If an 8:00 am class is required for your major, change your major.

    * Boring lecture? Start a wave!

    * College-level algebra: 5 returnable bottles = 1 delicious Ramen Noodle dinner.

    * "I Phelta Thi" is *not* a real fraternity, except at state colleges.

    * Remember - almost no one complains when you puke in a dumpster.

    * Clever margin manipulation can turn a 4-page outline into a 100-page senior essay.

    * Football games were never meant to be observed by sober people.

    * Don't think of it as sleeping with your professor -- think of it as "acing Micro- Biology."

    * In a pinch, milk can be used as a beer substitute in your breakfast cereal.
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    About betts

    Joined: Oct '01; Posts: 1,024; Likes: 20
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  3. by   prmenrs
    You come up with the best stuff!! Thanks!