A healthy diet with God's help

Nurses Humor

Published

In the beginning God covered the earth with broccoli,

cauliflower, and

spinach, green, yellow, and red vegetables of all

kinds; so Man and Woman

would live long and healthy lives.

Then using God's bountiful gifts, Satan created Ben

and Jerry's and Krispy

Kreme. And Satan said, "You want hot fudge with

that?" And Man said,

"Yes!"

and Woman said, "I'll have another with sprinkles."

And lo and behold they

gained 10 pounds.

And God created the healthful yogurt that Woman might

keep the figure that

Man found so fair.

And Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat,

and sugar from the

cane,

and combined them. And Woman went from size 2 to size

10.

So God said, "Try my fresh green salad."

And Satan presented crumbled Bleu Cheese dressing and

garlic toast on the

side And Man and Woman unfastened their belts

following the repast.

God then said, "I have sent you heart healthy

vegetables and olive oil in

which to cook them."

And Satan brought forth deep fried coconut shrimp,

butter dipped lobster

chunks and chicken-fried steak so big it needed its

own platter. And Man's

cholesterol went through the roof.

God then brought forth running shoes so that his

Children might lose those

extra pounds.

And Satan came forth with a cable TV with remote

control so Man would not

have to toil changing the channels. And man and woman

laughed and cried

before the flickering light and started wearing

stretch jogging suits.

Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in

fat and brimming with

potassium and good nutrition.

Then Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced

the starchy center into

chips and deep-fried them in animal fats and added

copious quantities of

salt And Man put on more pounds.

God then gave lean beef so that Man might consume

fewer calories and still

satisfy his appetite.

And Satan created McDonald's and the 99-cent double

cheeseburger. Then

Lucifer said, "You want fries with that?" and Man

replied, "Yes! And super

size' em!" And Satan said, "It is good." And Man went

into cardiac arrest.

God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.

And Satan created HMOs.

Amen

Farkinott, RN

581 Posts

Specializes in Renal, Haemo and Peritoneal.

Good one!!

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