Oh sweetie...life has certainly thrown you a brick to the face. It is beyond commendable that you were able to stop yourself rather quickly and ask for help. I'm sure many of us wish me had done the same...at a minimum I wish I had done that.
As others have said, taking care of your sanity is literally the most important thing now. Recovering said it perfectly regarding taking things one form, one call, one email at a time. This whole process is nothing if not slow. My therapist told me something that is super cheesy but has resonated hard with me.
How do you manage to eat an entire elephant?
One bite at a time.
Because that is absolutely what it feels like. Dealing with the issues that got you here takes precedence over everything, otherwise, well...we can never heal. And you are doing that! Taking care of your mental health first will make all the rest infinitely more bearable.
As for what your monitoring program looks like, try to tuck that in the back of your mind until you get things in writing. Some things that the intake counselor told me about my monitoring were true...some things were not. So, in the mean time, just deal with what you CAN deal with now.
Try not to imagine what your program will be like, because many, many people have a say in what our contracts look like. And of course it all varies by state, who evaluates you, what turns up in their investigation of your medical records and nursing practice, yada yada yada. Even how much investigation they actually do varies. They dug into my medical and work history like it was King Tut's tomb site. I've worked with others that got just a basic investigation. Since it's out of your hands now, try to focus on what you CAN control right now.
It may sound cheesy, but we ARE here for you. Venting, virtual tears, victories, and defeats. Based on what you've said, I personally have great hope that you will absolutely get to continue your nursing career. It's just going to take effort to prove over time that you are in a safer, better place. But it's certainly not impossible to survive this...and judging by how strong you sound, I'm confident you will do just that!
Best, warmest wishes to you.