Clinging To Hope

[Persephone Paige]

Hey all...

I'm having a very difficult time being positive lately. My decision to get my license back took a while, then the whole face the BON, get into IPN, complete the RN refresher course took forever. Still during that time I didn't seem to get discouraged. I saw it as a challenge, I met each obstacle with determination and relentlessness. And there were plenty of obstacles!

The license that I currently hold says 'conditional/active.' The 'conditions' are the I take an RN refresher course ( check ) and complete IPN ( almost 3 years in to a 5 year contract ). I was in an IPN contract for addiction to opiates back in 2007, I was diagnosed with Cancer. I made a decision at that time to stop monitoring, I let my license go through 2 consecutive licensing periods without renewing ( which made it null/void ). Boy, do I regret it. THAT is where I screwed up. But, I wasn't thinking at my best. I was having chemo ports placed, going through CT Scans and I was just whipped as a human being.

Fast forward to now, with so much of these obstacles behind me, I can't get a job. I've handled my fair share of rejections. To me, rejection means I was there, I put my best foot forward and "they" said NO. What I am experiencing now is not rejection, it's non-existence. I hear crickets chirping... No call, no email, no voice in HR saying 'thanks, but no thanks,' nothing. And I realize the world went through a great deal of change during my hibernation, dark night of the soul, whatever it was. Human contact is gone...

The thing I dislike the most about this season of my life is the forgetting of how very much I have overcome. I forget that I've left behind addiction. I forget that I have won a battle against cancer. I forget that I took on the BON. I chased them all over my state to never miss a hearing where my fate was in question. I forget that I drove to a hospital 3 hours South of me for a month, to complete the clinical portion of the RN refresher course because no hospitals in my area wanted me. I forget....

I forget in in favor of a profession that is unkind, uncaring, unforgiving to it's very own. My patients can be sick, I cannot.

I am really down right now and could use some insight into actions that can refresh my memory about why I am so very fortunate. And some tactics for making myself more appealing to this brutal profession I guess I still have a fondness for. Otherwise, I'm just going to think I'm a stupid individual.

Thanks for reading!

[SpankedInPittsburgh, DNP, RN]

Yay Recovering Yay!!!

[hppygr8ful, ASN, RN, EMT-I]

Are you applying for non-hospital jobs as well? Dialysis, SNFs, psych facilities, the usual gamut of restriction friendly jobs? Where are the nurses in your IPN group getting jobs? Can one of them put in a good word?

Hey I resemble that remark - being in monitoring got me into psych nursing which I have made into a career. I am a published researcher in the field of teen suicide and I absolutely love psych nursing so please don't talk about like it's a step down

Hppy

[Persephone Paige, ADN]

Hey All,

I actually love Psych nursing. Thus far I've probably put in about 100 applications, perhaps more. At first, I focused on the hospitals because I felt they would more easily be able to accommodate my restrictions. Probably 75 of my applications have been to hospitals. Since November, when my license was issued, I have had one phone call from a hospital. And the HR person says, " so, what's going on with your license, is it even valid?" I was not expecting HR to get involved in that, I didn't recover well from the surprise. I went into the explanation and I just never heard back.

I have applied for a few LTC places, State positions in the realm of Health Departments and Schools. I interviewed for one school health position, nothing. I had a chance to interview for another school health position but I would've had to travel around to 7 different schools and IPN wouldn't approve of my being on the move. I've applied for Dialysis, free standing psych facilities, hospital psych facilities, and I can't remember what else.

I believe it is because I have the triple-header against me: 12 years out of practice, conditional license, IPN monitoring w/the 1 year key restriction.

But, I will press on. My wish for every one of you is freedom. Freedom from the bonds of addiction, freedom from judgment from your peers, freedom from the wreckage of your pasts, etc. I wish this for myself too.

[SpankedInPittsburgh, DNP, RN]

I have great, great respect for Psych Nurses. For about 5 years our ER has acted as the intake for our new Behavioral Health Units (at the old location they had their own intake). We deal with just about all the folks they get and take care of these folks for a couple hours. I don't envy their jobs. Anyway, I'm finishing up my NP studies and if you want to make some money Psych NP is a very good choice as they make about $20K-$30K more than most of us new NPs in our market. Great Post Paige!!!

[catsmeow1972, BSN, RN]

And the HR person says, " so, what's going on with your license, is it even valid?".

I rest my case about HR sometimes being clueless idiots who are not even nurses. Clueless because why on earth would you apply for a nursing position without a valid license and an idiot for, in my opinion, having no intention of going further with your application and just being nosey into a situation that is not seen every day, and I'll add unprofessional (and cruel) to do that to someone.

Having said that, that is one of the reasons I try to stay with the larger hospitals. Where I aim to return to work at is where I previously worked (they don't think much of this contract crud either) has nurses for recruiters. My contact there is very supportive and I am still in contact with while I do this waiting game.

I'm sure you've been asked this, but are you able to relocate?

[Persephone Paige, ADN]

Hi Cats,

I am unable to relocate. The two cities North and South of me are able to accommodate me, if they will. My mind messes with me and I imagine their looking at the whole picture and saying, " Ugh, not something I want to deal with." Our tiny town is pretty saturated as RecoveringRN had suggested, but the big cities have tons of openings listed. IPN forbids me from doing Home Health ( or any nursing that removes me from a base camp ), no floating to other units if they are short staffed. It's kind of nice, except it ends up being impossible to remain anonymous. Used to be, we weren't even allowed to work on night shift, which excluded so many jobs that they had to allow it.

I had mentioned earlier that I have an interview this coming Friday. Public Health is perfect: no narcs, supervised, my restrictions will not really cause them inconvenience at all. I am excited and I get angry at myself for being excited. I have a lot of experience in this area, but I've been to two interviews in Public Health areas already and been passed over. They don't even have the decency to say, "sorry, but we've gone with another more qualified applicant." That would do so much for me emotionally. I wouldn't jump at my phone ringing, etc. I get upset with myself for getting excited.

Thanks Spanked, I found a whole other section of this website in Careers last night. People who have problems with the board, restricted licenses and criminal records. I was up until 7 am reading about tactics that have helped with securing employment.