Quote from Serenity0688
Had a very rough first year as a nurse had dream job left dream job and am now looking for new job.
was bullied a ton passive agressively and talked bad about all over my unit and made to feel incompetent, hazed/isolated and very uneasy last year and it left me feeling unsafe and insecure and drove my low confidence even further down...i Never really fit in on my unit. This Left me feeling like a bad nurse especially because im so new And i dont have a ton of experience!
1: Has anyone recovered from peer bullying and if so how?
2: how did you choose next job like how did you know it was a good fit for you?
There may have been a number of reasons why your dream job was a poor fit for you. While there are bullies in nursing -- I've encountered two over the past four decades -- it is likely that rather than being bullied, you just didn't fit in on your unit.
No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. (Eleanor Roosevelt). It looks as though you're blaming your colleagues for making you feel incompetent, isolated, uneasy, unsafe, insecure and "like a bad nurse." No one made you feel that way -- no one has that power.
You get over being bullied (if indeed you were bullied) by examining what you brought to the table. Think about those interactions with your former colleagues calmly and without the emotion and identify how you could have handled your part of it a bit better. When you choose your next job, start with the understanding that it is up to you to fit into the workplace, not up to the workplace to accommodate you.
I had a very rough first year of nursing, too. I was sure everyone hated me (they did) and were talking bad about me behind my back (they were). I was incompetent, and I was too scared, introverted and up tight to make an effort to get to know my colleagues. I rebuffed friendly overtures without recognizing them, and I didn't make any friendly overtures of my own. I made mistakes and fixated on them. Sometime after that first year, I began to relax a little bit and take the time to reach out to my colleagues, and get to know them a bit. When I stopped focusing on myself, my learning, my discomfort in my job and with my colleagues, I became more likable and people liked me more.
As far as choosing a new job -- choose one where the orientation is planned out with black and white goals, objectives and evaluations. Make sure the manager is someone you are comfortable with and who is willing to work with you. The patient population really doesn't matter -- your goal is to learn to be a good nurse. Once you learn that, your skills will transfer to the patient population of your choice.