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New grad nurse of 3 months and might lose job because I’m struggling in my orientation. Help!

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by Scrubba Dub Scrubba Dub (New Member) New Member

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You are reading page 3 of New grad nurse of 3 months and might lose job because I’m struggling in my orientation. Help!. If you want to start from the beginning Go to First Page.

133 Visitors; 10 Posts

17 hours ago, RegisterednurseRN02 said:

Send me a message! I am going through the EXACT same thing at this VERY MOMENT! My story is mimics yours! It is such a disgrace to be involved with a company that treats their new grads this way. I am done now at my company THANK GOD!

Looks like I can’t DM right now. Maybe cause my account is new :( give me ur fb or something haha

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morelostthanfound has 27 years experience as a BSN and works as a R.N..

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3 hours ago, JKL33 said:

No clarification required.

 

I have posted quite a few statements here about how I feel new grads/newer nurses should be treated. I support just about anyone who wants to learn and believe they should be given far more guided opportunity to do so in their orientation periods (and beyond) than they often are. When working with them I actually do try to say and do things in a manner consistent with how I would want to be treated.

That said, the people doing most of the training are simply regular human beings who are not given the time to do the job properly, are expected to take it on as a second FT job simultaneously with caring for patients (and all that entails) and themselves usually have had no (or very little/superficial) formal training in teaching others. If someone believes there shouldn't be any imperfect communications along the way, they are delusional and are in for a major disappointment.

Given the less-than-ideal circumstances in which all of this is happening, I suggest our intolerance be reserved for 1) Those who refuse to invest in nurses  2) Those few emotionally-toxic individuals who should not be in the position of training anyone.

^^^Agree^^^, unfortunately though, somehow it always seems that for whatever reason, it's often these these "emotionally-toxic" individuals who are tasked with precepting new nurses.  These types have never appreciated that it's not so much what you say, but how you say it and lack any self-awareness or diplomacy!

Edited by morelostthanfound

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133 Visitors; 10 Posts

4 minutes ago, boomshakelaka said:

OP. Have you figured out what you’re going to do? Are you choosing to complete your orientation?

I am not sure yet. I’ve got four more straight days of work before they decide. I had an easier day yesterday night so I did fine. It’s the weekend so it’s usually less busy. Just a little worried about days 3-5. 

But if I do still end up not meeting expectations, I am going to ask about maybe transferring. I had sort of asked my manager before and she just suggested looking at the hospital job board or working at a nursing home......😒

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Two thoughts on this.. first is to remember that negativity breeds negativity, which can come through in your performance if your not careful. Its very difficult to apply what you already know to your daily tasks and remember everything new or different that you've learned during your training when you're constantly worried about falling short of expectations. You waste time when you're stalling to think about whether they'll approve of the care you're giving or when you stop to second guess yourself unnecessarily. A hostile environment clouds your judgement and stifles your knowledge...if you let it! Try to keep a notepad and write down the specialty specific teachings that you DO get from your mentors. Take another look at them on your own time and maybe refresh yourself on some of the things you already know that may be helpful in this setting. I kept flashcards and books from nursing school for years after I graduated just in case I needed them, perhaps you've got something similar. Walk in there with confidence, carry out your tasks with confidence and show them what you KNOW you can do when you're not being berated. I don't know how much longer you've got but if there's time i'd give it a try before you resign.

Second thought...the right mentor makes a huge difference in your ability to learn and thrive. This is not your failure and does not define you as a nurse. If it does not work out for you there, know that you may find that special mentor in another care setting, even if its not your first choice.

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Ruby Vee has 40 years experience as a BSN.

11 Followers; 64 Articles; 169,008 Visitors; 13,793 Posts

On 4/12/2019 at 12:22 PM, Scrubba Dub said:

I’m really really going to fight for my job but at the same time, is it worth all of this toxic behavior from my preceptors and manager? What do I do?!

When you are a new grad, there is so much to learn!  While I'm sure this isn't at all what you wanted to hear, I don't think your preceptors or managers sound all that toxic.  I think the problem is in your anxiety and failure to develop positive workplace relationships.  Your manager may be doing the best she can when it comes to giving you feedback.  It would be lovely if every manager was gifted at providing feedback in a way the employees like to hear it.  That isn't possible in the real world, which means it's your responsibility to adapt to the way she provides feedback.

You have issues retaining new information, with time management, with the computer charting, with following the rules, and with anxiety.  And you have issues with the way people give you the necessary feedback to help you to recognize and learn from your mistakes.  

I don't want to be mean here, but your anxiety is your problem to manage.  It isn't up to your manager or colleagues to manage your anxiety for you.  While it would be lovely if everyone who had negative feedback for you would deliver it in the way you find most acceptable, that isn't their problem to manage, either.  Their problem is to tell you about your mistakes as clearly, concisely, precisely and kindly as possible.  If they are good with the clear, concise and/or precise, they're doing really well.  If they're failing on the "kindly" that is an issue for them to work on, but it doesn't really change the fact that you need to hear and respond to the negative feedback in a professional way.  You cannot discount criticism because you don't like the way it was delivered.  Many of us hate delivering negative feedback and struggle with doing it in the best way possible.  You also cannot blame the fact that you were told of your mistakes for the fact that you continue to make mistakes.  

If your colleagues tell you they are trying to help you, it is quite probably because they are really trying to help you.  It sounds as if they may be somewhat frustrated by trying to teach you things that you aren't learning. You might not like the way they're trying to teach you, but they are trying to teach you, and it's up to you to learn, even if you don't like the way the message is being delivered.  It is their job to tell the manager if you don't seem to be catching on, to tell her about the mistakes you've made and to tell her about your attitude.  The crying and anxiety are also things your manager needs to know.  Again -- it's not up to them to manage your crying and anxiety -- that's up to you.  I'm sorry.  I'm sure this isn't what you wanted to hear. 

 

 

 

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RegisterednurseRN02 has 3 years experience as a RN.

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@Ruby Vee Eh. It all depends. There is SOME truth in the fact that, we have to manage our anxiety as new grads and in a new environment..but, there are no 2 ways about it when it comes to really rude and non-supportive preceptors. They are out there. I had one. I am no longer in my orientation as a new grad at said hospital. It was not going to work no matter how things were twisted, talked about, etc. My preceptor basically went out of her way to ruin any possible chance of survival for me in that environment. I did all the things on my own, reached out to my educator, learned at home, made notes, watched videos to help my success but my preceptor's word was gold to the management and nothing I said had any value..so it wasn't worth the battle anymore for me. 

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4,038 Visitors; 148 Posts

Best wishes!   I appreciate your drive to give it all you got.  I know it's easier said than done, but no more crying.  Put your battle face on.  Crying is a dead give away  that someone is really struggling/overwhelmed (and its NOT unusual for a new grad to cry)  but if happens more than 1 or 2 times on orientation........i start to think they aren't right for acute care. 

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Do you work at a teaching hospital? These hospitals tend to be more forgiving to new grads. I worked on an oncology med-surg floor and it can be a challenge as you have to know the basics and more complicated stuff at the same time. I remember each of my patients having a ton of lines, IV, pain etc. The antibiotics would be ordered back to back. Vancomycin was ordered regularly and boy is that a fun antibiotic to give. Things move quickly on the floor. These patients can be one step away from needing to go to the ICU. They leave the floor a lot for different procedures so you constantly have to re-organize your plans for their care. I don't know if you are ready for something like this, the last thing you need to do is cry at work, because it shows your co-workers that in crisis situation it will be you needing support and you won't be able to help your patient. I want for you to be able to make it but you need to make some changes. I feel it is something with the way you are managing your time. If you don't understand what you are doing, you are losing time and getting behind. If you are uncomfortable with asking for help, again, you are losing time. With cancer patients you can only get so far behind to where it is almost impossible to catch up. Another big issue is the floor doesn't sound very supportive. Oncology was not my first job but it was my first medical - surgical job. 

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On 4/12/2019 at 1:22 PM, Scrubba Dub said:

I work on an oncology med/surg floor as a new grad nurse. I have been wanting to be a bedside nurse and I love working with my patients. But I am apparently not flourishing enough to be ready to come off orientation. I have trouble with time management but have been working diligently on it and have been improving bit by bit every day. But some days it’s so hard to finish on time when I am still learning a lot of new things and can’t always retain it all at once. I am also still struggling with understanding computer stuff and following all of the rules there are in everything I do. I am also a bit anxious and according to the nurses I work with on the floor, it shows. 

 

I’ve cried already 3 times at work because of the way the nurses criticize me. They say they are trying to help but when they would talk to me, they would say things like, “you don’t know this yet?,” “you should know this by now.” And everything that they teach me, they make sure to tell my manager the things I didn’t know how to do and the mistakes I made (that I learned from and corrected).

 

They would also keep telling me to stop being so anxious and crying all the time and it just made me feel even worse and I would not be able to focus on my work and would make more mistakes.

 

My manager isn’t really nice when it comes to giving me feedback. She never had anything positive to say. It was always just about the preceptors complaining about me doing things wrong. She thinks I am genuinely failing at this job and told me that if I don’t improve enough in my last week of orientation, that my employment will be terminated. 

I’ve been on orientation for about 11 weeks and I feel like I should be flourishing more than this and honestly, I am not happy here. I feel like I should be learning much faster than this. I know I am really new and it’s going to take a long time to get good, but I am not getting good enough after 3 months and that worries me that I am not cut out for this 

I’m really really going to fight for my job but at the same time, is it worth all of this toxic behavior from my preceptors and manager? What do I do?!

Wow! I’m sorry but it sounds like the nurses on that floor are complete and utter bi**%#s!!! You need to leave to a better setting because that environment seems poisonous and not uplifting/teamwork based!!! There are hundreds of thousands of job experiences out there. Go find the one where you will be appreciated for the determined and dedicated nurse you are. Know your value and strength and leave behind anyone who is jealous of that. The nurses who told you, “oh you should know that by now?” Yeah, I’d love to give them a piece of my mind! Don’t let those dummies step on you. Get the heck out of there! Find a job in an urgent care or minute clinic setting where you can have a small team based approach and practice your skills there. Then once you feel you want a bigger scale, then look for a hospital setting. Those dummy nurses who told you that, forget they are human beings and karma will hit them in the face soon. In the end we are all entitled to learn, thrive and flourish at different paces. But those who give themselves importance by stepping on others will feel the worst of it eventually. You’ll see. Life has a way of balancing out any perceived power. It’s never in one place for too long. Find a new setting where you can flourish at your pace and you will fly to greater heights than any of those rotten people you work with!!!! I just got accepted to nursing school and it’s my third college career. I have always learned to listen to my heart and never compare myself with anyone. I love working in a team but if I am being verbally abused or bullied in any way, you better believe I’ll stop that dead in it’s tracks. People on “power trips” tend to forget that we are all carbon based beings doomed to decay eventually. I like to remind those people to uplift each other because our quality time in earth depends wholeheartedly on that concept. It is in giving that we receive. Those people you work with may not realize it but they are only cheating themselves. You are smarter than that. Go find a place where uplifting happens!!!!!! 

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LibraNurse27 has 5 years experience.

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Starting out in oncology sounds really tough. On top of learning basic Med/Surg diagnoses, skills, time management, etc. you have to learn chemo drugs, reactions, manage pain and deal with emotionally difficult situations. Not to say that regular Med/Surg isn't challenging (it definitely is!) but adding the specialized nature of Oncology and the fact that these patients are often very sick/complicated/potentially unstable is an extra challenge. I really think advocating that they give you a chance on a regular Med/Surg floor would be great for you and their investment. Hopefully it will be a more supportive environment and if you are more successful there they will also have not wasted their money... win, win! You sound very conscientious and like you really are trying your best to improve. I hope this experience doesn't affect your confidence too much; you can still have a wonderful nursing career ahead of you! Good luck

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TriciaJ has 37 years experience as a RN and works as a Retired.

6 Followers; 31,610 Visitors; 2,988 Posts

OP, only you know at this point whether it's worth forging ahead in this position or time to look elsewhere.  One thing, I do encourage you to take RubyVee's advice to heart whatever you end up doing.

She's talking about the style vs the substance of giving constructive criticism.  Many young people have trouble seeing past the style and don't get the benefit of the substance.  Sometimes the style is just terrible but the substance is worth hearing.  Eventually, you'll be able to tell the difference between constructive criticism and criticism that isn't constructive.

About crying:  I learned at a conference that you can stave off tears by rolling your eyes toward the ceiling.  I never had a chance to try it, but was told by coworkers that it works.  Good luck.

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71,352 Visitors; 243 Posts

OP,

New grad RN orientations (at a hospital setting) are usually 12 weeks at most (except for some specialty areas like OR).

Based on your first post -

If you only have a week left, you are better off resigning at this point and reapplying elsewhere.

As others mentioned, if you get terminated, you have to explain it when asked on future job applications.

On the other hand, if they terminate you, you may quality for unemployment checks (though, this option may not be worth it in the long run). 

Is there a particular reason why you do not want to resign from this job just yet (i.e. have children, moving expense, upcoming rent, etc.)? Spending 11 weeks seem excessive for an environment with several red flags.

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