Is being in a clique bad?

duskyjewel · Sep 9, 2014

Maybe you talk more than you think. I just read a thread here about disruptive students that make it impossible for others to concentrate in class.

Next time someone stares, ask them why. Best way to get an answer.

PacoUSA, BSN, RN · Sep 9, 2014

I was in school with 4 girls that were practically joined at the hips. Wherever you saw one, at least one or all of the others were nearby. It was weird. Sometimes they would pee together, not lying! I would have sworn they would be taking jobs together after graduation just to avoid separating (they didn't).

Perhaps it is this constancy of togetherness that is getting you the stares? I agree, if it's an issue do ask why.

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OnlinePersona, LPN · Sep 9, 2014

Maybe your talking more than you know.

**NICU Guy, BSN, RN** · Sep 9, 2014

The problem with clique is that it is seen as exclusivity, causing people outside the group to feel excluded or judged. If your six do not interact with the other 104 in the class (invite others to lunch, for example) then there is an "us versus them" mentality, whether it is intentional or not.

duskyjewel · Sep 9, 2014

Man, I am SO glad I'm approaching 40. When I get into school, I am going to ignore all this high school steer manure and concentrate on what actually matters in the real world: learning what I need to be a nurse.

sueall · Sep 9, 2014

Our pharm class had a clique that always sat in the back. They swore up and down they were not disruptive, but they were constantly glancing at each other, smiling or gesturing, texting back and forth, putting on makeup or combing their hair, writing each other notes and exchanging them, snorting, giggling, or trying not to laugh. And they all wore these clunky bracelets that were constantly rattling and banging on the desk tables. They were VERY disruptive. More importantly, their behavior was disrespectful -- to the rest of the class and the instructors. They thought they were a "clique," but truthfully, they were an isolated, unwanted group because their behavior ticked everyone off. Our instructor went out of her way to make sure the group was separated during exams, while the rest of us were free to sit where we wanted. You'd think they would have picked up on this "little hint," but they never did.

Please understand -- I'm not saying that you or your group are doing this!! I don't even know you. But my point is -- a group of students can be disruptive without ever saying a word.

lampard · Sep 9, 2014

OK, but our whole class is generally "cliquey" and sit in the same spot and hang out with the same people everyday..

This is not the US btw... maybe the people in US are more friendly and talk to everyone outside of their clique.

I didn't want to belong in a clique either, but everyone seems to be in a 'group' because it's such a huge class.. there are some people in twos though. and somebody was saying that cliques are the best way to "survive" nursing school... I'm sure this happens in medical school as well.

My guess is that.. the people who stare at us probably want to join our clique. They probably think we look motivated and studious haha..

And also, I don't like talking to people outside of my clique, because I'll have to introduce myself again, and the same conversation starts with"what school did you go to?" "How old are you" etc.. and I don't like giving too much info about myself.. and don't feel that I have to know everybody in the class.. hope it didn't sound snobby though. Maybe I'm still immature.

LadyFree28, BSN, LPN, RN · Sep 9, 2014

OK, but our whole class is generally "cliquey" and sit in the same spot and hang out with the same people everyday..
This is not the US btw... maybe the people in US are more friendly and talk to everyone outside of their clique.
I didn't want to belong in a clique either, but everyone seems to be in a 'group' because it's such a huge class.. there are some people in twos though. and somebody was saying that cliques are the best way to "survive" nursing school... I'm sure this happens in medical school as well.
My guess is that.. the people who stare at us probably want to join our clique. They probably think we look motivated and studious haha..
And also, I don't like talking to people outside of my clique, because I'll have to introduce myself again, and the same conversation starts with"what school did you go to?" "How old are you" etc.. and I don't like giving too much info about myself.. and don't feel that I have to know everybody in the class.. hope it didn't sound snobby though. Maybe I'm still immature.

US or outside the US, there are people who gravitate towards people, some are more of a social butterfly, others not so much, and then there are cliques...it really doesn't matter.

If you have a group that is a life line, so be it; also it doesn't hurt to make small talk with others either...just sayin'.

PacoUSA, BSN, RN · Sep 10, 2014

... and somebody was saying that cliques are the best way to "survive" nursing school...

Definitely not true.

I never sat with the same people all the time, I liked the variety, got to know many people in my class ... and I would hardly call myself a social butterfly. Not only did I "survive" ... I graduated with honors as well.

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CallMeBlessed · Sep 10, 2014

"Maybe I'm still immature."

This sounds about right.

Trauma Columnist · Sep 10, 2014

I think we are providing the poster with ethnocentric answers as I think most of the posters on this thread are in the US.

May we ask if this is the normal behavior in your culture? Are you all of a different culture/ethnicity than the majority of students?

I have lived overseas in three different countries with vastly different cultures and while I am an American, its always been fascinating to me to see how other cultures do life.