I think I'm professional, but now I'm not so sure, after I told some American friends that as a male nurse, I don't catheterize women.
'That's sexist' was one of the kinder comments, while one of the more rational comments said - "We are professionals. As long as we behave in a professional way, then we should all have to do the same job."
I naturally asked 'does this mean we're nurses first, and men/women second?' and they didn't give a concise answer.
Am I the only male who thinks that it is harder for a female patient as well as for a male nurse to do such an intimate procedure?
Am I the only nurse who thinks that gender does matter? What harm does it cause if I choose not to do a procedure when there are capable people around who could do it just as well, plus make it easier for the patient. As a male nurse, I need a female chaperone if doing such a procedure on a woman anyway, so why not make it easier for everyone and simply keep the male out of it altogether?
But what does being a "Professional" mean? From what I'm hearing from others it sounds like I am a sexless machine capable of doing it all because that is what I am paid to do. Instead I think of myself as a caring carer. I have my faults and biases. I make mistakes and I sometimes let my feelings help make my decisions. But I have a big heart and I do the job because I care first. I enjoy making people laugh when they're sick. I enjoy being able to make a difference in people's lives. I also do the job recognizing my faults, and if I ever think that my views/faults may jeopardize a patient, I know to get someone else to take over that patient's care. I guess I'm not a very successful Sexless Professional. But I can live with being called sexist and unprofessional, just because I sometimes refuse to do female catheterization. I'm sure there's a lot worse things I could be.
A couple of extra points to mention:
For the record, the female staff used to ask me to catheterize the men, and they'd do the same for my female patients, and we never had a problem.
Also it's strange, but apparently I'm allowed to catheterize little old ladies, but not young women. Sounds a bit ageist to me. Do the feelings of older people not matter as much as those of young people? Naturally I'd never contemplate such a procedure on a young woman.
Specializes in M/S, LTC, Corrections, PDN & drug rehab.
They are selling their humanity, and you're buying their degradation and the cheapening of the sexual act. Even if they "consent" it's still wrong, and I submit that people don't consent, truly, to being used by other people. They submit because they don't have other choices, for whatever reason. Consumers and producers of Mediaography are users of people.
If they want to sell their dignity, that's their choice. As long as it is legal there is nothing wrong with it. They didn't have to do it but obviously they wanted to do it for whatever reasons. I don't think it cheapens sex, because sex is very individual. What I like is (obviously) different from what you like.
If someone wants to watch Media, as long as they are of age & watch the legal Media there is nothing wrong. As long as the people getting into Media are legal & consenting there isn't anything wrong either. If that is their choice, that is their choice. My ex-best friend HATES nursing just as much as you hate Media.
Ah, you reminded me of my college days back in the 70's when PP would have groups of women sitting in circles with mirrors to check out their own genitalia.
I dunno . . .some things should just be private.
I'm cool with certain things being private - I didn't ask to see any - but it seems that as medical professionals who will inevitably need to cath someone we all ought to know where the urethra is... and if they didn't learn it in A&P, I'm the man to draw them a disturbing stick figure.
I can appreciate we may draw the line of appropriate conversation in different places.
You are a nurse; therefore you should provide the necessary care to the patients you are assigned despite their sex. The only time you should not provide this care is if the patient has a problem with you doing so.
I don't think it should matter, professional should all do the same duties. However I also know patients often feel differently and that should be accommodated whenever possible.
Specializes in M/S, LTC, Corrections, PDN & drug rehab.
Slavery and spousal rape used to be legal. You might want to have a tighter moral code than that.
Wow, really? Slavery & rape is COMPLETELY different. Your comparing my morals to it? Just because someone chooses to view or engage in Media does not make their morals wrong. Media has been around for a little while. Like I said, as long as the viewer & actors are consenting, legal adults there is nothing wrong with it. The government doesn't think so either. If you think so take it up with the government. I'm talking Media with just adults, not minors, animals or anything else.
Short answer, if you don't like it don't watch it. Because obviously Media isn't going anywhere. People are going to keep making it & watching it.
Specializes in OR, Nursing Professional Development.
You might want to have a tighter moral code than that.
I really think that a person's morals are going to be dictated by several things such as upbringing, religion, what have you. However, other people's moral codes may not match. And that's okay. People are different, unique. So are the cultures they live in. But telling people their morals are too loose because they don't match yours isn't right, especially when it involves something that is currently legal. Yes, it may change in the future, but this is now.
I'm cool with certain things being private - I didn't ask to see any - but it seems that as medical professionals who will inevitably need to cath someone we all ought to know where the urethra is... and if they didn't learn it in A&P, I'm the man to draw them a disturbing stick figure.
I can appreciate we may draw the line of appropriate conversation in different places.
The "bible" in the 1970's . . ."Our Bodies, Ourselves". I can't be sure but I think that book is where the idea of a party with other women in a circle looking at their genitals started. Maybe not.
I'm very open with my conversation about sex and all it entails. My (poor) kids got the straight scoop about sex - wet dreams, masturbation, STD's complete with a public health poster with photos of what those diseases look like on genitals. We talked about everything . . .or, I talked about everything. I called every thing by it's proper name . . no "tallywacker" in my vocabulary.
Slavery and spousal rape used to be legal. You might want to have a tighter moral code than that.
Yeah, I think the word "legal" doesn't legitimize things.
Yeah I think the word "legal" doesn't legitimize things.[/quote']
I'll agree with you that legal/illegal doesn't legitimize a thing, but where there are two consenting adults, should there really be a law against it?
This is not me condoning Media. I don't watch it, don't want my husband to, and will be teaching my kids that it's not my standard for them. But two consenting adults don't need me being their moral police.
I'll agree with you that legal/illegal doesn't legitimize a thing, but where there are two consenting adults, should there really be a law against it?
This is not me condoning Media. I don't watch it, don't want my husband to, and will be teaching my kids that it's not my standard for them. But two consenting adults don't need me being their moral police.
I'm not a big fan of curtailing my opinion because it might appear I'm making a judgment about something.
If that were true, then no one could judge Red and I for thinking Media is not good for folks. . . . .
There are so many better things to do with a person's life. In my opinion.
I'm not a big fan of curtailing my opinion because it might appear I'm making a judgment about something.
If that were true, then no one could judge Red and I for thinking Media is not good for folks. . . . .
There are so many better things to do with a person's life. In my opinion.
No one is asking you or anyone else to curtail your opinion. No one's asking you to like Media. You and Red aren't the only ones here who aren't fans.
But it's also not really any of your, my, or anyone else's business what consenting adults (key words there) do with their lives or their free time. I'm sure there are things you and I do that people don't approve of but since we are adults and choose to do them, and harm no one else in doing them, it's not other people's call to make.
No one is asking you or anyone else to curtail your opinion. No one's asking you to like Media. You and Red aren't the only ones here who aren't fans.
But it's also not really any of your, my, or anyone else's business what consenting adults (key words there) do with their lives or their free time. I'm sure there are things you and I do that people don't approve of but since we are adults and choose to do them, and harm no one else in doing them, it's not other people's call to make.
I was under the impression we were just discussing things. I'm not barring the door of the bedroom and locking down the internet in anyone's home.
I dunno . . .some things should just be private. 
OrganizedChaos, LVN
1 Article; 6,883 Posts
If they want to sell their dignity, that's their choice. As long as it is legal there is nothing wrong with it. They didn't have to do it but obviously they wanted to do it for whatever reasons. I don't think it cheapens sex, because sex is very individual. What I like is (obviously) different from what you like.
If someone wants to watch Media, as long as they are of age & watch the legal Media there is nothing wrong. As long as the people getting into Media are legal & consenting there isn't anything wrong either. If that is their choice, that is their choice. My ex-best friend HATES nursing just as much as you hate Media.