I think I'm professional, but now I'm not so sure, after I told some American friends that as a male nurse, I don't catheterize women.
'That's sexist' was one of the kinder comments, while one of the more rational comments said - "We are professionals. As long as we behave in a professional way, then we should all have to do the same job."
I naturally asked 'does this mean we're nurses first, and men/women second?' and they didn't give a concise answer.
Am I the only male who thinks that it is harder for a female patient as well as for a male nurse to do such an intimate procedure?
Am I the only nurse who thinks that gender does matter? What harm does it cause if I choose not to do a procedure when there are capable people around who could do it just as well, plus make it easier for the patient. As a male nurse, I need a female chaperone if doing such a procedure on a woman anyway, so why not make it easier for everyone and simply keep the male out of it altogether?
But what does being a "Professional" mean? From what I'm hearing from others it sounds like I am a sexless machine capable of doing it all because that is what I am paid to do. Instead I think of myself as a caring carer. I have my faults and biases. I make mistakes and I sometimes let my feelings help make my decisions. But I have a big heart and I do the job because I care first. I enjoy making people laugh when they're sick. I enjoy being able to make a difference in people's lives. I also do the job recognizing my faults, and if I ever think that my views/faults may jeopardize a patient, I know to get someone else to take over that patient's care. I guess I'm not a very successful Sexless Professional. But I can live with being called sexist and unprofessional, just because I sometimes refuse to do female catheterization. I'm sure there's a lot worse things I could be.
A couple of extra points to mention:
For the record, the female staff used to ask me to catheterize the men, and they'd do the same for my female patients, and we never had a problem.
Also it's strange, but apparently I'm allowed to catheterize little old ladies, but not young women. Sounds a bit ageist to me. Do the feelings of older people not matter as much as those of young people? Naturally I'd never contemplate such a procedure on a young woman.
Anecdotal story: As a student my first experience watching a female being cathed was by my male RN mentor - it was on an elderly woman who was clearly uncomfortable with him being there and it made him very nervous - he kept trying to insert the foley into her privy parts. [/quote']
Early in nursing school I was carpooling with a group of female students and (for some nursing-related reason) we started talking about vulvas. It turned out that, of the three women in the car, only one of them actually knew what one looked like. We literally drew a picture and labelled the parts, like a textbook. Which sounds weird, and maybe it is, but I used to volunteer as an educator at Planned Parenthood, so this was par for the course for me (plus I'm a terrible artist, so my drawings are as cartoonish as they are informative).
Anyway, it never ceases to amaze me that we're so shy about genitalia that a group of people who would someday be expected to cath women had managed to make it that far without knowing the general geography. Thank god for the sim lab, or they may have tried putting caths everywhere.
Spidey's Mom!!! (As to Media . . . . I'd vomit if I found my husband watching that. Lovemaking should be lovemaking . . . . not getting all hot and bothered watching someone else do it and then using your spouses body to "get off". But, that's just my opinion. My son will not get a cell phone for that reason - I'm a school nurse and we've confiscated phones in elementary school where girls have sent boys naked photos of themselves. But that's another thread. )
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Yea, personally, I wouldn't be thrilled thinking my husband is looking at Media all day, but we can't dictate to other adults what "lovemaking should be".
As far as the kids and cell phones, you have heard me rant about them over in the SN thread. My boys do have them, they are teens, I don't know what they have seen or not seen. We don't LET them watch Media, or drink or do drugs, but I don't know for a FACT that they haven't done any of those things.
I DO know how they carry themselves and treat others, and how others speak about them, and I am very, very proud of them.
I knew you were going to reply to me! LOL. (Folks, Farawyn and I are AN pals so no worries).
My older kids are adults (32, 30, 26) so cell phones were not common in school then. Spidey will be 14 and he will not get a cell phone. He has no computer either and his internet access is limited by what mom allows on HER computer.
As to Media, to each their own. I'm just saying . . . .it makes me sick as I think it denigrates what is supposed to be happening between a man and woman (husband and wife). But that's just me and I won't picket the government to ban it. Y'all make yourselves happy if you want!
Early in nursing school I was carpooling with a group of female students and (for some nursing-related reason) we started talking about vulvas. It turned out that, of the three women in the car, only one of them actually knew what one looked like. We literally drew a picture and labelled the parts, like a textbook. Which sounds weird, and maybe it is, but I used to volunteer as an educator at Planned Parenthood, so this was par for the course for me (plus I'm a terrible artist, so my drawings are as cartoonish as they are informative).
Anyway, it never ceases to amaze me that we're so shy about genitalia that a group of people who would someday be expected to cath women had managed to make it that far without knowing the general geography. Thank god for the sim lab, or they may have tried putting caths everywhere.
I might have been inclined to give each woman a hand mirror and direct her toward the bathroom....no time like the present to see what's been there their whole lives!
Early in nursing school I was carpooling with a group of female students and (for some nursing-related reason) we started talking about vulvas. It turned out that, of the three women in the car, only one of them actually knew what one looked like. We literally drew a picture and labelled the parts, like a textbook. Which sounds weird, and maybe it is, but I used to volunteer as an educator at Planned Parenthood, so this was par for the course for me (plus I'm a terrible artist, so my drawings are as cartoonish as they are informative).
Anyway, it never ceases to amaze me that we're so shy about genitalia that a group of people who would someday be expected to cath women had managed to make it that far without knowing the general geography. Thank god for the sim lab, or they may have tried putting caths everywhere.
Ah, you reminded me of my college days back in the 70's when PP would have groups of women sitting in circles with mirrors to check out their own genitalia.
I might have been inclined to give each woman a hand mirror and direct her toward the bathroom....no time like the present to see what's been there their whole lives!
I might have been inclined to give each woman a hand mirror and direct her toward the bathroom....no time like the present to see what's been there their whole lives!
Reminds me of a scene in the film Fried Green Tomatoes. "Get your mirrors ready, ladies!"
You obviously have *very* strong feelings against Media. I don't know why.
Because I believe in human dignity, and that buying and selling human beings is wrong. Because sex is more than physical, it involves the spiritual and the emotional. Because legal does not equate to right.
Because I believe in human dignity, and that buying and selling human beings is wrong. Because sex is more than physical, it involves the spiritual and the emotional. Because legal does not equate to right.
We are on the same page here so don't feel all alone.
As a female RN, I'm just amazed that other female RN's feel they are able to analyze what goes on with male nurses. I'm not a man, therefore I cannot assume I know all about what males experience in this culture. I know I'd resent it if a male RN started making assumptions about how I experience life, including job, as a female.
As a female RN, I'm just amazed that other female RN's feel they are able to analyze what goes on with male nurses. I'm not a man, therefore I cannot assume I know all about what males experience in this culture. I know I'd resent it if a male RN started making assumptions about how I experience life, including job, as a female.
That's another good point that came to me as I read through this thread. Although there were some nurses who are male who either agreed or disagreed with the OP.
Personally, I was thinking that as a female, I can't really say what it feels like to be a male nurse and what kinds of experiences they have. I've certainly talked with some though and there is a legit concern about false accusations and so great care is taken to make sure that won't happen.
It is a minefield out there sometimes . . . . you can step in it so easily without meaning to do so.
Specializes in M/S, LTC, Corrections, PDN & drug rehab.
Because I believe in human dignity, and that buying and selling human beings is wrong. Because sex is more than physical, it involves the spiritual and the emotional. Because legal does not equate to right.
It's one thing if someone is bought & sold. It's something else completely if a competent adult of sound mind makes the decision to do it.
It's one thing if someone is bought & sold. It's something else completely if a competent adult of sound mind makes the decision to do it.
They are selling their humanity, and you're buying their degradation and the cheapening of the sexual act. Even if they "consent" it's still wrong, and I submit that people don't consent, truly, to being used by other people. They submit because they don't have other choices, for whatever reason. Consumers and producers of Mediaography are users of people.
if I found my husband watching that. Lovemaking should be lovemaking . . . . not getting all hot and bothered watching someone else do it and then using your spouses body to "get off". But, that's just my opinion. My son will not get a cell phone for that reason - I'm a school nurse and we've confiscated phones in elementary school where girls have sent boys naked photos of themselves. But that's another thread. 
)
I knew you were going to reply to me! LOL. (Folks, Farawyn and I are AN pals so no worries). 
Dogen
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