I just dont know

Tweety, BSN, RN · Apr 1, 2006

There are plenty of areas in nursing where you are not going to see such things. You don't have to do peds and you don't have to work emergencies.

But yes, nurses do get to see the ugly side of life and life's trauma's, humans inhumanity to humans.

We have to confront our own feelings about life, spirituality, death, helplessness and life's cruelties.

Perhaps your own fears, disgust, hurt and anger (whatever you were feeling) can be looked at as a postive trait that you're going to be a good nurse.

You have feelings and aren't a stone. That could be an asset.

Also, the more we face our fears and are exposed to them the better it gets.

However, only you know what you can and can not handle.

lisabeth · Apr 1, 2006

There are plenty of areas in nursing where you are not going to see such things. You don't have to do peds and you don't have to work emergencies.
But yes, nurses do get to see the ugly side of life and life's trauma's, humans inhumanity to humans.
We have to confront our own feelings about life, spirituality, death, helplessness and life's cruelties.
Perhaps your own fears, disgust, hurt and anger (whatever you were feeling) can be looked at as a postive trait that you're going to be a good nurse.
You have feelings and aren't a stone. That could be an asset.
Also, the more we face our fears and are exposed to them the better it gets.
However, only you know what you can and can not handle.

Thank you Tweety!!! I know I can handle lots of things, but that was litterally heartbreaking. It is funny to think 20 years ago, I was planning to be a teacher. It is just so hard to believe people can hurt children, and babies like that.

Race Mom, ASN, RN · Apr 1, 2006

People handle things in different ways. You don't know how many of those other people viewing the pictures went home and bawled their eyes out. I don't know if anyone could look at those kind of pictures and not be heartbroken and disgusted. It would affect me 100%, I probably would have cried right there, but I (100%) want to work in Peds (I haven't had my clinical rotation in Peds yet, so things could change, but I have this sense and connectedness with the specialty). Unfortunately, this stuff goes on. It will never end. I want to make at least one ounce of difference in some childs life (and parent's too). I know I have the compassion (you obviously do to) to do what I can to make a difference. Unless you work in a doctors office (well-checks), everyone you see is in some sort of distress. They need nurses to help them understand how to cope with their situation, or how to get better and improve their life. When you've accomplished that goal with them, could there be any better reward? Do not second guess yourself. You obviously have what it takes to make a difference.

PS I was also afraid of needles. It wasn't even the "shot" that got me (well, kindof). Just looking at that needle would make me sweat. We had our lab on injections. I couldn't sleep the night before, and I was worried. After the three hour lab, my phobia was history. Of course, I only performed injections on a injection pillow and maniquine arm. I still had to give a live body one. Wel, that happened Thursday. I gave someone insulin in their abdomen. I was more nervous while I prepared it. I just went in a DID it. After the needle went in, I was thinking "that was it?", then pushed the med in, pulled out the needle and viola`! It didn't hurt me one bit!!! It is really different when you are on the giving end.

VRGirl · Apr 1, 2006

My first degree is in Education, and I was totally heartbroken over a student I had in student teaching (this was in 1993). This was a fifth grade class, and this particular boy had ADHD for which he was obviously receiving no treatment. The other kids didn't like him and the teachers disliked him even more because he had such a hard time learning. He would come to school having forgotten his lunch money, and the teachers wouldn't lend him money or give him anything to eat in order to "teach him a lesson." Apparently things weren't any better at home for him. Whenever he would forget his lunch money, I would give him the milk from my food tray (the teachers would not let me give him lunch money or food). I also tried to give him extra help in class (as much as they would let me, anyway).

On the last day of my student teaching, this little boy wrapped himself around my leg, cried and begged me not to go. Needless to say, this broke my heart. I told my dad about it, and he told me that that little boy will remember me all his life for being kind to him when nobody else was.

I guess my point is that although we will contine to see some heartbreaking things, we can make a difference in somebody's life whether it be from physical abuse, emotional abuse, or whatever. I have never forgotten that little boy, and I believe my dad was right and that he has never forgotten me either.

Daytonite, BSN, RN · Apr 4, 2006

For me, it was taking care of people who had been shot or stabbed. Don't know why, but it just got to me that another human being could do this to someone else. I ended up having to quit a job because I just could not stand it anymore. I was able to take care of the patients while at work, but it was after work and during my off time that my mind went on overdrive over the situations of these people. When a victim is your patient, they need your help and that, I found, was easy to do. It was only when we started to learn about the victims personal life or their significant others who had been the cause of the problem that it got hard for me to deal with.

I vaguely remember sitting through a lecture by a police officer who was a specialist in child abuse when I was in nursing school 32 years ago. It shocked me then and troubled me. She showed us some real shocking pictures of injuries inflicted on babies and children. It is sad that there are people in our society that would do this to others, but it happens. It is important that we know the signs that it may be happening. The good news (?) is that in my 30 years as a med/surg nurse I have never been directly exposed to any cases of child abuse. A case here and there came into the hospital where I worked and were gossiped about, but the patients were never on any of the units where I worked.

Having never been in the military, I often wonder if I would be able to care for soldiers injured in battle. I sure would like the chance to find out, but I am far too old at this point in my life.

andhow5, BSN, RN · Apr 10, 2006

I remember a lecture in school that just horrified and infuriated me. I wasn't sure I'd be able to provide care and not come completely unglued with the offending abuser.

However, I've done well - in fact I've been able to pull some children from bad situations (literally taken them away and arranged for foster parents to come to the ER) and that made it worth it. And being as suspicious as I am also helped in one instance.

A custodial father brought his 12 year-old son in to ER after a visit with drunk mom and step-dad. Son was hysterical and "not able" to tell us how he got hurt. Mom and step-dad, still drunk, show up to visit the child - father OK's the mother coming into the room.

Father steps out for a moment to use restroom. The hair on my arms were literally standing up, so I found something to keep me busy very near the door of the room.

Not even 25 seconds later I hear the son screaming bloody murder, I run into the room (having kicked the door open) to see the mother drawing her arm up into a fist and trying to take a swing at her son.

I launched myself at that woman and held on to her like a monkey. I didn't have time to yell for help or call security - I just knew I was NOT going to let her hurt that child, no matter what.

I'm 5'7", and she was about 6 foot, very drunk, and now very pissed off. I was able to get one of her arms turned up behind her back, and my other hand was latched into her long, ratty hair, right up against her scalp at the base of her neck.

I had a good solid hold on her but I was not hurting her physically. The father walked in and when he heard what happened, didn't even blink...

I was able to march her out of the room (unfortunately all the way at the back of the ER) and out into the lobby and deposit her right next to the police officer on duty. She was screaming, swearing, and swinging all the way through the department, and we were getting all sorts of attention.

I told the cop she was not allowed to come back into that room for ANY reason.

Could I have handled it differently? I'm sure I could and SHOULD have - but I saw an immediate threat and acted with my gut feeling. I'll never regret it nor will I apologize for over-reacting.

I'm sure that child will remember someone that stood up for him and guaranteed his safety (for however short a time) when no one else would (or could). I still wonder about him and how he is.

lisabeth · Apr 10, 2006

I remember a lecture in school that just horrified and infuriated me. I wasn't sure I'd be able to provide care and not come completely unglued with the offending abuser.
However, I've done well - in fact I've been able to pull some children from bad situations (literally taken them away and arranged for foster parents to come to the ER) and that made it worth it. And being as suspicious as I am also helped in one instance.
A custodial father brought his 12 year-old son in to ER after a visit with drunk mom and step-dad. Son was hysterical and "not able" to tell us how he got hurt. Mom and step-dad, still drunk, show up to visit the child - father OK's the mother coming into the room.
Father steps out for a moment to use restroom. The hair on my arms were literally standing up, so I found something to keep me busy very near the door of the room.
Not even 25 seconds later I hear the son screaming bloody murder, I run into the room (having kicked the door open) to see the mother drawing her arm up into a fist and trying to take a swing at her son.
I launched myself at that woman and held on to her like a monkey. I didn't have time to yell for help or call security - I just knew I was NOT going to let her hurt that child, no matter what.
I'm 5'7", and she was about 6 foot, very drunk, and now very pissed off. I was able to get one of her arms turned up behind her back, and my other hand was latched into her long, ratty hair, right up against her scalp at the base of her neck.
I had a good solid hold on her but I was not hurting her physically. The father walked in and when he heard what happened, didn't even blink...
I was able to march her out of the room (unfortunately all the way at the back of the ER) and out into the lobby and deposit her right next to the police officer on duty. She was screaming, swearing, and swinging all the way through the department, and we were getting all sorts of attention.
I told the cop she was not allowed to come back into that room for ANY reason.
Could I have handled it differently? I'm sure I could and SHOULD have - but I saw an immediate threat and acted with my gut feeling. I'll never regret it nor will I apologize for over-reacting.
I'm sure that child will remember someone that stood up for him and guaranteed his safety (for however short a time) when no one else would (or could). I still wonder about him and how he is.

:angryfire I dont know what I would have done. I am only 5'1 I would have done something though, and probably just what you did, but I can be assured, she would have taken me out. I cannot believe a mom would do that especially when her son is in the hospital. There are some really sick and cruel people out there.

I am over my being so unforsure about nursing. Nursing is just about all I think about. I was just very upset.