I cant shake this feeling...

Silverdragon102, BSN · Aug 2, 2007

sorry you are feeling like this. There will always be times in your career that will give you doubts and worries, try not to let it get to you. I am sure if there was any problems you would get to hear about it.As long as you are doing your job properly and ask for help if you need it I would say just get on with it. we all need some support and may be worth posting in the general forum and you may get more answers

((((hugs))))

Testingone · Aug 2, 2007

My heart goes out to you,you must have a call or you wouldn't be in the profession. realize nursing is a passion in your passion develop compassion for others those psych/junkie paients, deserve to be treated with dignity regardless of our personal feelings, I don't know about you but, when I acceepted my call to nursing I accepted caring for people and there was no guarntee of the type of people/paitient. I have found in my 18 years as an LPN heart felt learning and growing experiences which have motivated me to advance my education that I might continue to make a differnce in the lives of the people I take care of as well as the people I work with

when it's in your heart the rest will follow

in every season there are lessons embrace

them and what you have need of will begin to flow

fluffwad · Aug 4, 2007

Sounds like you need a change of pace / scenery / co-workers. Consider a different unit or facility.

Some companies just have a 'mentality' that runs thru the whole place, sometimes just in certain parts of it.

HJS27 · Aug 4, 2007

Maybe a slower pace in an office setting? Or just a different area...L & D? nursery? Sounds like you may just want to place yourself in a setting where you can catch your breath, and learn at a little slower pace. Life is too short to spend time working in an area where you feel rushed and overwhelmed constantly...check around, and find the perfect fit for you...you know what type of atmosphere makes you feel good about yourself and what you do. Get yourself there.

Homesteader2B · Aug 7, 2007

Greetings,

I wish I had some words of wisdom to share, but I too am having a very difficult time in nursing. I am ready to leave the profession altogether. I am an LPN working in LTC for 3 years and I am so burned out. I used to enjoy the facility where I presently work, but lately I just can't stand it!

I cannot complete a morning med pass (including the tx, feeding and misc stuff) in the two hour window. I give ALL of the meds and make sure the residents take them. I toilet people and feed and help the CNAs. Some other nurses that work on my unit do not pick up any of that extra work. These other nurses also get their med passes done in 1 and a half hours! Something is wrong with either my work or what they are doing! Of course, they complain that I take too long, but I answer..."do you want speed or accuracy?...'cause you're not getting both".

I am very tired of the backstabbing at my facility! Also, I am tired of the charge nurse passing meds for the other one every day. I was under the impression that only the nurse on the cart was allowed to pass the meds! I guess my head is still stuck in nursing school! I am so stressed out from this job and a common response is to go work somewhere else, but it's going to be the same at any other nursing home. I am working on the ASN (with Excelsior) but I am so fed up that I don't know if I'm going to keep working as an LPN.

I really care for my residents and it saddens me to think about leaving. I've gotten attached to many of them but it's not worth the stress and depression. I've decided that I'm going back to college to pursue a BS in biochem or molecular bio and then apply to veterinary school. It's something that I've wanted to do forever and I now have the motivation.

I hope that nursing will get better for you and that you find an area that really fits you. Good luck!

Kelly

Jade005 · Aug 9, 2007

You know Nursing is just what all of you have described. I spent the first ten years of nursing as an LPN job hopping and looking for my niche. Don't get me wrong I stayed at least 1 yr at all my jobs with the exception of the few nightmare places I worked. Some jobs I kept for 2-3 yrs. I was gaining experience and confidence along the way, the experience of knowing which areas were not for me and which ones I liked but just didn't care for the politics of the individual facility,coworkers,etc. I started doing Home Health and found that it was a dream job for myself; It was flexible for a single mom raising kids, the hours were perfect I could get the kids off to school and even make and keep Dr appt.'s,Dentist, meet with teachers etc., all in between and around doing my visits. I was able to completely avoid the politics and backbiting that so often occurs in hospitals and nursing homes.(familiarity breeds contempt) So for the past 7yrs that is what I have done. My youngest is 16 now and I just graduated from a bridge program with an ADN. My plan has been to work in the Hosp to gain experience working as an RN so that when he graduates and trudges off to college I can begin Travel Nursing to offset the cost of his education while still earning enough to prepare for my own retirement. I may have to form a different plan, I have been working on a med/tele unit for the past 5 months like you, it is nights and of course the staffing is horrible especially for someone who has not worked in a hosp for more than ten yrs. The patient acuity is very high but most nights I still have 7-8 pts. I feel so completely overwhelmed and frustrated that I am not able to provide quality care for my patients. I go in and my back is against the wall trying to get everything done. I'm learning very rapidly but somehow it doesn't ever seem to be fast enough. I asked one of the other nurses a couple nights ago how she managed to get it done with time to organize her vacation pictures, or surf the net for more vacation pkgs or sit in the lounge reading books. Her response: "I guess I learned to start cutting corners, I probably shouldn't but thats how I do it". I think that is alarming and I just can't bring myself to entertain that concept. I guess what I am trying to tell you with this is that you are so involved in what you are doing that you don't know what the other nurses are actually doing (or not doing). So stop beating yourself up go home and look things up in your medsurg book or other resources go in a few minutes early and check the policy book on your floor get a subscription for RN 2007 or some other professional journal. Remember any nurse who knows everything is dangerous to herself and her patients. Our profession is constantly evolving and We all learn better ways of doing things and new skills everyday! Lastly, There are no telling how many success stories are never told because someone quit right before they succeeded! Hang in there! :uhoh3:

nursen_99 · Sep 2, 2007

This may be lack of self confidence or self esteem at work but I need some support from veteran nurses.
I have been a nurse for just two years and most of the time I think I made the wrong career choice. Why ?? I am making myself a wreck inside.
I did my first year out of school on a exceptionally busy med-surg/tele floor in an inner city. This floor was awful and after having left I realize how much time I wasted there. I barely learned anything. I just passed pills and babysat psyche pts and junkies. No real medical challenges or oppurtunities to learn. I have since transferred to another hospital (tele floor) and have learned so much in just over 9 months that I feel like a real nurse. I am being challenged and I am learning new things every day. Here is where the problem lies. My new floor is also extremely busy. Pre CABG , post cath, R/O MI, blah blah blah. Lots of drips (never hung 1 drip in prior hospital. They were all done in ICU) I get so overwhelmed at times when I have a really heavy assignment that I dont always think of everything instantly that should be done , or maybe Im just not able to put all the pieces together at that instant. Some of the older techs ,who I have asked why they didnt get into nursing with their knowledge of what nurses do on my floor, have to suggest things to me. Makes me feel pretty stupid. Dont get me wrong, they are all nice but I dont trust them. They dont really talk to me like I see them interact with other staff. I kinda feel like maybe the more seasoned nurses and long term(techs) look at me and think I am an idiot. All nurses no how overwhelming it can get, especially when you are still learning. I came from a job before nursing, where people knew that I knew my stuff. There was no doubt I was compitant in my abilities. Now I feel like I am a laughing stock. It doesnt help matters that my NM and charge offer no feedback, not since day 1 unless I ask. (They too are very nice) They say they have never heard any complaints when I question them about how I am doing. I work nights so I dont see them but for a few minutes once in a while. My first review was fine but very much like ,here, read this and sign. Any questions. No encouragement, no feedback, no nothng. Am I the only one that feels like this? I am so hard on myself, I know this. I do get anxious and have been told that is noticeable at times, ( I am told that I have gotten much better with the anxiety )but everyone handles stress differently. Its not like I have had any melt downs yet, but I did have stress induced shingels after on especially rough assignment. I was out 2 weeks. Please somebody tell me I am going to be ok. Does this feeling of inadequacy ever go away. I feel like I have come so far with my knowledge base but I cant get over the feeling of paranoia that everyone at work thinks im an idiot, even though I know I am not.

******************

I read your post and it instantly took me back to '00 when I was a brand new nurse! It almost brings tears to my eyes because it's just how I felt. I was anxious, stressed and miserable. I took a job at a major teacher hospital in Philly and was thrown into the fire instantly. My preceptor was a joke and my manager was rarely seen. I felt that rather than being helped, I was being tested in front of other staff members. Everyone was so nice to my face.... soooo nice... and always quiet when I was around. I am not a paranoid person but I swore I was almost paranoid then. I learned nothing and was made to feel like I knew nothing. I was misrable!

I left that job on my last day of orientation. I just couldn't deal for another day. I left and went to another major urban hospital and felt the same. I was beginning to worry that it was maybe me. I had a BSN from a top school and did pretty well. I was also a great/fast learner. I was really starting to doubt myself. I couldn't accept that it wasme so I took one more chance and left that place too. The 3rd place was the right fit! I knew then it had not been me. I learned more in my 1st 3mos there then I did at the other 2 places combined! This too was a major teaching hospital so go-figure. :-) I was doing charge by 9 mos and precepting at 1 yr. I've since traveled, done peds, trauma and now L&D. And it's always an easy transition. Whether I've had 2 days orientation to 3 mos. People are always telling me they thought I'd been a nurse for 10+ yrs until I tell them otherwise. It had not been me. As I think it's NOT YOU. Leave. Find your NICHE. It's out there. Don't let this obvious bad fit make you regret your professional choice. Go somewhere else and start FRESH. Good luck!!