Quote from Emtmurse15
I work night shift from 7pm-7am. My wife is 26 y/o and does not want to stay home alone because she says she feels lonely. She stays at her parents because of this. She has done this since we got married two and a half years ago. We have a baby daughter now and she does not want to stay home even during the day while I am asleep. So if I work at least two days in a row, I do not see my family for that time. My in-laws have even made extra efforts to make her stay at their house easier with a room with a crib and pretty much every necessity for her not to stay at our home. Our house has a security system and is in a nice neighborhood.
When I am home at night, my wife leaves all child care to me so I do not get enough sleep on my days off. I am attempting to get a dayshift position. There are no dayshift positions in the ICU I work in. One prospect is an afternoon shift position 11am-11pm in the ER.. My wife says she would still stay at her parents so I need to wait for another job. I have told her that I am not getting enough sleep on my days off or when I am working. I get a lot of responses of "you're never here." I have asked her to go to couples counseling but she refuses.
She is also a nurse and we stayed in this town so she could work at the VA. When I first started my nursing career, I had to find jobs out of town because no local facilities were hiring. I spent my first year and a half of nursing driving an hour out. I have told her that I did a lot to accommodate her nursing career. Is it too much to ask her to stay home at night? And possibly see her and my daughter between shifts?
I am not relationship expert, but there is a lot in what you are telling us and not writing.
Your wife's age has nothing to do with this marriage is working.
First, you and your wife are married, but she does not want to stay home because she feels LONELY. Are you dating your wife? Are you communicating on daily basis? Marriage is a 2-way street. Is your wife working as an R.N?
Second, you have a child, but your child is not sleeping at home. why?
When you off are you want to sleep all day and night and have her take on the child? There needs to be a better balance.
I can tell you love your wife and appreciate the family for helping. Leave the baby over your in-laws and date your wife reassure her she is the one. Have a family day. Even when you are tired change a diaper clean the house the little thing matter.