Student Bullying - page 2

I have a question...how to deal with student bullying. I am an older student and have over 20 years as an LPN. I have encountered a problem at the school I am attending to finish my BSN/MSN. One... Read More

  1. by   VM85
    Sorry for all of the things that are going on! And bravo for handleing this very professional and maturely!Cuz if i were in your situation, i dont know if I would be able to control myself! I think it would be best to ask other students if they have noticed the bullys' behavior and if it has happened to anyone else. Its hard to get people involved, and some people may not want to stand up, but if there is a few of you, maybe theyll take you seriously. When your life is endanger, no means is extreme! The fact that the president has done this is ridiculous! Can you switch your schedule so that you dont see this person?Or if you feel really unsafe, its a hassle but maybe transfer!And maybe if you do see a councelor and she sees your sane and you are in danger, she'll report it since its mandatory(i would think!!!) to a person that takes it just as seriously as a person should! Whatever you decide to do, just be aware of your surroundings- and make sure your safe!Its aweful to have to live like that, and i really hope for yours and your family's sake this is resolved appropriatley! GOOD LUCK!

    oh and I forgot to say DOCUMENT, DOCUMENT, DOCUMENT!!! write down everything that goes on, everything you hear, any threats that are made...and all of your calls, appt's with the school, their thoughts and actions, if any! So you can back track every little detail by date and time if something ever happens and you need to have a timeline!
  2. by   nerdtonurse?
    What I would do (and I'm the first person to say that I think lawyering up usually makes things worse, but....):

    Write a letter, stating what the person said, when they said it, and if anyone else was around. Also list who's been telling you things about the student wanting your address. And that the President's concern was NOT with your safety. List when you met with him, who was present, what was said.

    File the letter with an attorney, and send a copy to the President of the college, stating that you have filed a letter with the attorney which details all that info and requests your heirs to pursue the school as an entity and the president personally if anything happens to you. If anything happens to you he will be an accessory before the fact because he knew about the threat to your safety and chose to do nothing.

    Put HIS pocketbook on the line, then he'll be concerned....
  3. by   Crux1024
    Isnt there some accrediting institution that you can report this too?! I can not believe the school is approaching this situation in such a manner. Im seriously disgusted. I also second the news stations. College campus violence is very real and should be taken seriously.
  4. by   Adams_Mommy_07
    I really, truly, 100% do not think you should let this go and "keep quiet." They are trying to downplay the threat and trying to make you feel like you're panicked and need therapy because of some influence this other person has. What that influence is, I do not know, maybe they are related to a who's who, or they are from a influential family, or their parent is an alumni, or the school simply does not want to lose their tuition. Whatever the case may be, you are being bullied by your educational institution which has an obligation to protect its students from violence and threatening and hostile atmospheres. I guarantee you there is something in your student handbook that can back up the fact that something needs to be done against this student.

    I would start speaking with an attorney.
  5. by   Alternator81
    If you want to stir up problems for yourself take the advice of others on here- call the news stations & go above the deans head to report this problem, complain to the instructor, ect. Read a few posts on here and you will realize that going about the dean's head is the surest way to cause A LOT of trouble for yourself!

    My advice:

    let it go! Fall below the radar! Lay low!
    Last edit by Alternator81 on May 13, '09 : Reason: opps
  6. by   Daytonite
    something doesn't add up, sound right or is being left out about what you are posting. first of all, someone threatening to kill you is not bullying. so, you are not making a correct conclusion. if you are analyzing that incorrectly, i am wondering if the dean and president of the university, who have come to a different conclusion, have analyzed the situation correctly. unfortunately, you, the dean and the president of the university are there and know what is going on and we only know your side of the story. i was recently called in by the dean saying she heard rumors that i was telling people outside the school about my situation. is this true? why would you call attention to yourself like this? the last thing you should be doing is inciting the person into action!

    any suggestions out there? what i would have done was gone to court and filed for an order of protection against this person. force this person to stand before a judge and defend their statement. i am surprised that the police did not suggest this, which makes my suspicion that the whole situation has not been told to us by you. secondly, stop talking about this person to everyone you run into. it's no ones business. even your friends have told you to be quiet about it. you really ought to listen to them. as you are learning, you are now looking like the bad guy. if the person wanted to get a rise out of you they certainly had no problem pushing your buttons and setting you off, standing back and watching the fun as you self-destruct. did you ever think that maybe you are being manipulated and played by this other person? that your protests against them are exactly what this person wanted and that killing you was never their intention at all.
  7. by   TinkerNurse
    Quote from daytonite
    something doesn't add up, sound right or is being left out about what you are posting. first of all, someone threatening to kill you is not bullying. so, you are not making a correct conclusion. if you are analyzing that incorrectly, i am wondering if the dean and president of the university, who have come to a different conclusion, have analyzed the situation correctly. unfortunately, you, the dean and the president of the university are there and know what is going on and we only know your side of the story. i was recently called in by the dean saying she heard rumors that i was telling people outside the school about my situation. is this true? why would you call attention to yourself like this? the last thing you should be doing is inciting the person into action!

    any suggestions out there? what i would have done was gone to court and filed for an order of protection against this person. force this person to stand before a judge and defend their statement. i am surprised that the police did not suggest this, which makes my suspicion that the whole situation has not been told to us by you. secondly, stop talking about this person to everyone you run into. it's no ones business. even your friends have told you to be quiet about it. you really ought to listen to them. as you are learning, you are now looking like the bad guy. if the person wanted to get a rise out of you they certainly had no problem pushing your buttons and setting you off, standing back and watching the fun as you self-destruct. did you ever think that maybe you are being manipulated and played by this other person? that your protests against them are exactly what this person wanted and that killing you was never their intention at all.
    i honestly don't see how she did anything wrong.
  8. by   SummerGarden
    "hello, local police department ... i would like to file a complaint against an individual who threatened violence against me.... his/her name is ____________... could you please guide me further on how to best protect myself? i tried to talk to my administrators and the campus police and got nowhere. this person has told me of weapons that he/she wishes to use against me and is looking for my address. thank you."


    i do not play games... some people act like he/she is 12 but they play dangerous games of grown criminals. that is the point when they need to be taught a grown up lesson. running to the administration and campus police got you nowhere so i would bring in the law enforcement... let's see how fast administration moves to protect you since in doing so they will be protecting their own behinds!!! btw, i agree with bringing in the media if all else fails. if you truely feel threatened, then something needs to be done! gl!
  9. by   Daytonite
    i looked at several other posts made by this op who stated "i am a 1lt in the army reserves right now." in another thread right after posting this one. [Military Nursing Question] seems to me that someone who is a military officer knows not only chain of command, but the rules of how society is run and wouldn't make the mistake of calling a threat by someone as being bullied, or intimidated. i think the wool is being pulled over our eyes here and that this op has not revealed everything, or has made this scenario up to see what kind of reactions it would get. the situation sounds too illogical.
  10. by   criticalRN10
    WHY the hell did this person theaten to kill you!?! what a psycho! have you tried confronting this person? I totally agree with the press thing...but you dont want that to affect your graduating from the program since obviously the school doesn't really care about your well being...maybe talk to the school and threaten them with going to the press unless they take action..and that threats of violence are not acceptable in ANY atmosphere!! especially a professional one!!
  11. by   criticalRN10
    Oh wow..just read the other two pages of this... daytonite you are right- sounds FISHY i dont know any army buddies that wouldn't know what to do if they had their lives threatened...actually most of them would probably beat the person's ass then dare them to try and kill them!!!
  12. by   Cilantrophobe
    Quote from Alternator81
    If you want to stir up problems for yourself take the advice of others on here- call the news stations & go above the deans head to report this problem, complain to the instructor, ect. Read a few posts on here and you will realize that going about the dean's head is the surest way to cause A LOT of trouble for yourself!

    My advice:

    let it go! Fall below the radar! Lay low!
    There is nothing wrong with going above the Dean's head as long as you talk to her about doing so before actually doing so. It's called working the chain of command. But as we are seeing, this entire story is most likely bogus.
  13. by   rambleandwrite
    I am sorry that some of you feel my story is bogus. It is not a lie or made up. Yes, I tried to go through the chain of command as taught by the military. When the President and Dean of the university refused to take my complaint as being real, various classmates went on my behalf to show not only their concern but as witnesses to the fact. Two of my classmates were told by the individual that they would do what they could to "mess me up professionally". This individual was asked to leave a prior program before coming to this one. The person on the outside is a fellow professional, who knows many individuals in the medical community. I expressed to them my frustration and disappointment about how this matter was handled. They advised me to do what I have already done. They did say "don't rock the boat" because I am close to graduating. That is the person who went to the Assistant Dean and expressed a concern on my behalf. Two days later I was called in to the Dean's office and told to drop it (they would hate for me not to complete the program) was their words. One of the posts came from one of my classmates...we can't identify the school or area at this time because of fear of repercussion from administration. I asked my classmates what they thought about posting this on the site...some were for it, some weren't. It is hard to understand someone elses position. And as noted already I have been accussed of lying and not being forthcoming. I have waited 20 years to complete this degree...I have spent close to 70k to complete and I hate not being able to pressure them into doing the right thing. I am sleighted to do the MSN with this school but am not sure if I will at this point.
    The individual who threatened me, did so because I stated that their behaviors were unprofessional. They lie about every event that takes place. Hardly anyone in our class associates with this person because of their behaviors. There is only one person who sits by this individual while were in class. Administration is very much aware of their behavior but does little to control it. At this point I feel it has to do with money. I have had no interaction with this person since the event took place but still this person continues their negative behavior towards me-verbally.
    I am not going to apologize to anyone for trying to complete program with the least amount of stress. But I will contact the state board when I am done and give them the documentation and let them decide if they want to do anything against the school or the individual. Oh, on that subject are school has provisional status right now.
    I would like to thank the one's who did support me. Thank You.

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