llg gave you a good approach to use. i recommend that you don't include any of these words: i've changed my mind. it might give the impression that you are indecisive and that is a characteristic that an rn can't afford to display when she's trying to land a job.
i'd like to make a couple of points. i've been a manager in a number of facilities and done a fair amount of hiring interviews. an interviewer has a public relations responsibility to put his/her best foot forward and show the facility off in the best light possible. that includes delivering crappy news in a tactful way or just not revealing it at all. sounds like this manager failed that task miserably. most companies are concerned about their reputation in the community. i'm sure the ceo wouldn't be happy to hear one of his managers is sending disillusioned job applicants, who are also members of the community, back out into the neighborhood with a story to tell of poor treatment during a job interview
by someone in the hospital's employ. then, again, maybe the people in the chain of command above her don't give a hoot about customer service either. that would be a good reason to turn tail and ride off into the sunset as far away as you could get from this facility.
if this manager was this tactless with you, a stranger, a job seeker who, unless she's been hiding under a rock, knows is putting her best foot forward to impress her, how in the sam hill do you think she treats her own staff? you have very good instincts. all my years of experience tell me that this is not a manager i would want to work under either. she's got, at the least, a problem with taking other people's feelings into consideration.
the manager sets the tone for the staff he/she leads. there's a very good possibility that her icu crew is aware of these thoughts and feelings she has about new grads working in the unit. if that is the case, then anyone on the staff who also harbors the same ideas and is not able to control their own behavior is going to have no problem expressing those same sentiments to new grads at any time, place or event. they can be relatively sure that their manager won't chide them for it. just the kind of stress a new grad needs--not.
it only takes one cold-hearted co-worker like this to make a new grad's working life miserable and drive them out of their new job.
a bad day is not an excuse for anyone in a professional position to behave badly. we are trained to act like professionals and put on a "professional face". a manager should be held to an even higher level of behavior on this. however, the nursing shortage may be the reason that an ill-suited manager such as this got the opportunity to be in this position.
from your prospective, file this experience away and remember how important the words are that we use with others. so, too, are the feelings that we leave them with. when you find yourself in a position of leadership, pick your words carefully when dealing with people who are in subordinate levels.
good luck to you. i commend the care and consideration you are giving to this very important decision of landing your first job. remember, they need you more than you need them.