Just burnt out

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I'm half way through my program. Half of my class is gone due to failing and many others have only been saved by questionable last minute bonus points (some avail to the rest of the class and some not) I just lost my job last weekend because I kept cutting my hours to study more and finally they told me that they were letting me go (little bit more detail there but thats the gist of it...I didnt expect it but I did see it coming). We're in debt up to our eyeballs to get me through school. My house is a disaster. Our program is of questionable merit, and I have not yet found a student or clinical site past or present that has had anything positive to say about it. Yesterday we had a quiz in Pharmacology, a test in Med Surg 3 and a test in AP2. I also found out that I failed a quiz in Med surg that I took on monday. There's more, but you get the gist.

As of today I have not had a day off since Christmas (but now that I have no job...).

I'm just so fed up. So done. I don't know how I'm going to put one foot in front of the other and go back in next week. I have always felt as though I really loved school and while I dislike many things about my program, its always been a challenge to me to do well. I thought I found my calling in Nursing. But today... this whole week... its all I can do not to just give up and walk away. I am so burnt. I could sleep or cry or ... I don't know what. I don't financially need to go, and in fact its hurting my family that I am going to school (cost of child care is more than my house payment and two vehicles that I've gone through thus far ect - one caught on fire and the engine siezed on the other, neither covered by insurance and this is just since august)

Does anyone else ever feel this way? I am so frustrated and annoyed and I can barely stand to be around my classmates or my teacher or anyone at the clinical site. I dont trust myself around friends and family because to be honest, I'm just a royal b$%^# right now. I am just so sick of spending every single waking moment of every single day studying or going to/from class and clinicals, studying, squeezing my parenting responsibilities into the very few moments of free time I have (I let my daughter stay up almost 2 hrs past her bedtime last night just because it was my first chance to snuggle with her in a week)

I should say that I am not a person prone to being moody and have a tendency to speak my mind and move on. I'm just SO stuck in a rut at this moment. The thought of going to work after school is over makes me nauseous. I just want to curl up on the couch and watch a full season of Hero's with a pizza, 6 pack of beer and a bucket of ice cream.

Thanks for listening to me vent. (err reading my vent)

Anyone else starting to lose sight of their goal in the midst of school stress?

you already answered your own question. you will just keep doing what you are doing, remember that you are way ahead of many like me, and just keep putting one foot in front of the other.

i just posted a response to another's post, but from what all of my friends tell me that are currently in ns or already have been, you will be surprised to find that there are student friendly jobs out there that will work with your schedule and let you work as little or much as you want and need to, just start talking to people to put it out there and i am sure some suggestions of how you can find some extra $ will come your way!

you can do it, you have come this far. go to the pre- nursing thread and read a bit, and thank god you are not one of us. you have already done it, gotten in to ns, and are now half way done!!! i for one am very impressed!

if you cant find it within yourself to find a reason to stay in ns and fight the good fight then do it for those of us that will (hopefully come after you) that look up to you, please don't quit, you are almost there! debt is temporary but your license will be permanent!! keep your eye on the prize...

hang in there!!!

christine

:heartbeat

thanks :) your response cheered me up :) I forget sometimes how far I've come. It feels like I have been in school for a decade and I cant imagine life without nursing school.

I'm going to just take the weekend off I think (mostly anyways...a test next wednesday in pharm) and try not to think too much about school and see if it helps.

Although not in NS, I am taking my pre-reqs, have 3 kids at 3 schools (in two different towns) and have a sick mother living with me right now.

I can completely relate to feeling overwhelmed at times. On those days, I slow down and take a deep breath. I try to work in 15 minute increments to battle the mountain. What that does first is to have you focus your mind on an immediate task at hand. Not worry about the 1 million other things on the list. I set my timer and say, ok for 15 minutes, i am going to study this page or chapter. When it dings, I go to the kitchen and say for 15 mintues i am going to clear the sink of dirty dishes ( i pay no mind to the mound of trash in the garbage or the school papers on the island). When i focus, i bring my mind back to the present and i can actually get something done. Likewise, I do read the flylady.net website which has helped me organize and purge my house a little at a time so that it doesn't get so crazy. Now set that timer for 15 mintues and give yourself that amount to evaluate your school (not worry) and get a plan together. Maybe the immediate goal is to just pass this semester. Then don't worry about the reputation of your program at this moment. you can deal with that later. But, use the energy you have to try and get whatever credit you can from this semester. Should you decide to transfer, you will at least be seen as giving it your all for the last weeks left.

Some of my best 15 minute thinking sessions, come in a quiet bathtub. lock the door and set that timer and soak and think of a plan for 15 minutes. You will get so much done and feel much better about things. When those minutes are over, you have to quit fretting about school and do another task. Worry doesn't get anything accomplished and actually holds us back from reaching our goals!

Good luck!

NS is overwhelming and if you ask anyone, ANYONE who has either gone through it or is going through it, they will tell you that. It challenges us in ways that a lot of us never imagined it would. So don't feel bad about feeling burned out. I think it is a fairly normal response. Especially when we're in the final stretch of a semester and it feels like we've been slaves to NS for forever. We spend so much time studying, studying, studying, going to class, practicing skills, preparing for clinical, oh and STUDYING (ha ha) that I think a lot of us forget to do other things in life. Or we feel like we can't. But that is exactly what we need the most. Step back and just be a normal person for a day, don't do ANYTHING related to school. Take the day to spend with your child. Or be lazy and lay on the couch channel surfing if that's what you want to do. Go to the beach. Go shopping. Something, anything, just as long as it is NOT NS related. It will give you a break and will probably help put things back into perspective. Now, I'm not saying this is something you should do all the time, but every once in a while, absolutely!

Don't be too hard on yourself. What you're feeling is normal. But YOU can choose how you deal with it. Plus, you're half done. Eyes on the prize my friend!

Thanks for the supportive feedback. After talking with my friend on the way home from clinicals I was really feeling discouraged (she's not feeling as I am and was pretty much annoyed with me I think) and it feels good to know that I'm not crazy. I've never had burn out feel quite like this before. Usually it just makes me not want to study and then I've just taken a night off and gotten back on the horse in the morning.

I took a long hot shower and thought things through (as the above poster suggested) and it dawned on me that it doesnt really matter where I work or if I work at this point. I guess I was so stressed about the "is this really worth it" and comparing my areas of difficulty to those of classmates (hate it when my classmates say "oh I have no trouble with med surg" when I struggle with it and feel like I am a failure for that - they're not any smarter than me, and not doing any better than I do so I dont know why it stresses me so much. I dont know why they say that.)

I think I just am going to take the above posters advice and not think too far ahead and work in smaller increments. There are a lot of things that I am bothered by and sick of at this point, lol, but they really dont stand between me and passing my next test, so thats what I'll focus on.

This weekend, I'm taking my family to the Aquarium (a full day trip) and last night we took a walk together (babies in the double stroller and everything) and I baked some apple crisp for dessert and made dinner and read a good (not school related) book. I haven't done these things since last summer, so I'm really looking forward to the rest of my weekend. :)

Specializes in E.R..

Dark, oh my gosh, I felt like you were in my head. I am in the exact same rut right now. I am in my 4th semester, and OB is impossible at this moment. I am due to graduate in August, but I feel like my OB teacher will do everything in her power to make so that I can't. I won't go into all the boring details, but I want you to know you are not alone. I still have 3 clinical days left with this woman, and I feel nauseated when I think about that fact. All I am trying to do, is keep moving. I feel like a horrible mom to my children right now, due to my very high stress and anxiety. I just pray for strength and that in the end I will pass this clinical rotation. Remember, you are not alone.

Specializes in Med-Tele, Internal Med PCU.

You must take time for yourself, time away from school. Personally, I take 1 day of the weekend just to bother my wife... err I mean hang out with my wife.

And during the week, I try to spend no more than 2 hours doing school stuff. It doesn't always happen, careplans, and sometimes I feel like "I just don't get it", but generally I limit my study time. I learned the hard way about "over studying" and not following the syllabus.

Next time you're at clinical look around, there are some pretty smart RNs out there, but without looking too hard you can find some that just make you scratch your head and say "If they can get through school and get a license, I had better make it."

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