Dealing with Downers?

  1. Hey, all. How do you guys deal with classmates/study group members who are really downers, but blame their grades on everything but what THEY are doing? I have 1 or 2 in my study group, they both are getting grades on tests around 60-75%, but seem to blame wording of questions/topics not covered on outlines/etc rather than blame themselves for not studying(which they admit to). One's not too bad, and a bit of a youngun, at 21, and knows she can do better and will (she's really close to the pass mark--which is 80%). The other is so far below passing I wonder if he's going to drop by tomorrow. He's gotten grades around 60% average. Says he's working full-time, kid on the way, 4 hours sleep, etc. etc. And I'm thinking, you still have to study, else you Can't pass! I'm just staying positive and ready to go....got a 92% on my nursing process test today!! WHOOT!
    (that's how I felt when I saw my grade!!)
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    About locolorenzo22

    Joined: Jan '04; Posts: 2,449; Likes: 1,252
    ortho neuro detox nurse, new tele nurse
    Specialty: ortho/neuro/detox, tele

    16 Comments

  3. by   moongirl
    congrats on your test grade-!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    and how do I handle that situation? I DONT DO study groups!
    I would end up whacking somone- this I know, so I just dont even go down that road. Me, my piles of notes and flashcards and my dining room table- tried and true method.
  4. by   locolorenzo22
    I generally study by myself as well, but do the group so I have some sort of sembalance of a social life! LOL Plus too many distractions at home(including the baseball playoff games..., allnurses, TV, CDs, figure out something needs cleaning, etc!!) Don't think it'll be too bad as my work starts tomorrow so I'll be busy!!!
  5. by   Lisa CCU RN
    Who cares what they have to whine about?

    The only person that has to graduate is you.:spin:
  6. by   Laura77598
    Yes,

    I get those people alot in my classes. I just don't talk to them. I am one of the most quiet people in my classes. I don't talk to many others, and I keep my ears open in case one of them says something useful. I hear alot of the ones who do poorly on tests complaining and assigning blame to all sorts of different sources from teachers to wording of questions to the hour of the class. I just don't let the complaining bug me, but I do listen, incase they happen to say something useful. It does happen. Frequently, the people in mmany of my classes just don't know how to take tests. They know the information COLD- in some cases better than I do, but more often than not, they rush through the tests, don't focus on the question being asked, and just panic when tests are passed out. I tell them frequently, they should just relax ( after all, it IS only a test, no one ever DIED from getting an F on a test before), and read the question slowly and choose the best answer (We get LOTS of Multiple Choice tests). I even underline the main words in the test question so I can pay closer attention to what's being asked. Remember when you were in grade school, and your language arts teacher told you to underline the subject and the predicate of each sentence? Sometimes we were told to underline the subject and circle the predicate or verb or just the main idea or points of the sentence. I do that on my test questions, and it eliminates the distraction words or phrases. Y'all pay attention to this. It really helps.
    At any rate, I just try to ignore downers. They don't mean any harm, and they sometimes have something useful to say. Sometimes they have lots of useful information that you may have forgotten or missed in your reading.

    Laura
  7. by   navynurse06
    I agree with the above about studying alone. I studied alone all through nursing school and graduated cum laude. I found that when I studied in groups that I did more talking about other stuff besides the up coming test. It also seemed like over half the people in my nursing class were like the ones you just mentioned. I'm sure the teachers got really tired of hearing them whine and complain. I just learned to block those people out and do my own thing.
  8. by   GratefulHeart
    I'm not a study group type person either - find them to be a major waste of time - but here's what's been working well for me so far: I type up study guides based on the objectives, material from lecture and the books, and recently I found someone else who does the same thing - who also is a dedicated worker. Once we have our study guides ready, we email them to each other and combine them into one guide about a week before the test. We each then have a *master guide* from which we can eliminate info based on what we each think is most important - and then we privately study that for our test.

    We've been quiet about this process with our classmates so far, because we don't want others joining in just to get a free study guide without feeling like they have to contribute something. This only works well for us because we both put a lot into it. We are, however, planning to invite others into this process as we discover their study style is similar to ours.
  9. by   locolorenzo22
    That's a good idea, grateful....There's one member of the group who's usually really on the ball and I think her and I will probably do some private studying as we're not going to give our hard work to someone who isn't reading or doing anything themselves, etc.
    I generally do study alone, but find myself rooting with/for the few people I know so far and get along with. I'm kind of the floater, who talks with just about everyone in the class, and usually gets along with everybody. Although, that tends to be a bit of a stretch sometimes....It takes a lot to make me react to a person(see my other post....LOL).
    I'm just enjoying the fact that I'm on my way and around 2 years from now....I'll be an RN!!! BOOYAH!!! (Trying to set myself for positivity for the next few months...winter arrived today at 35 degrees!!!)
  10. by   Marie_LPN, RN
    I don't do study groups either. Makes it easier for me to study.
  11. by   abbythetabby
    Quote from GratefulHeart
    I'm not a study group type person either - find them to be a major waste of time - but here's what's been working well for me so far: I type up study guides based on the objectives, material from lecture and the books, and recently I found someone else who does the same thing - who also is a dedicated worker. Once we have our study guides ready, we email them to each other and combine them into one guide about a week before the test. We each then have a *master guide* from which we can eliminate info based on what we each think is most important - and then we privately study that for our test.

    We've been quiet about this process with our classmates so far, because we don't want others joining in just to get a free study guide without feeling like they have to contribute something. This only works well for us because we both put a lot into it. We are, however, planning to invite others into this process as we discover their study style is similar to ours.
    Hey, you're not my study partner are you? I did the same thing this week w/one of my classmates. I use OneNote to drag in bits of my instructor's presentations, the module learning objectives and illustrations. It actually makes an excellent study guide and weighs a heck of a lot less than five textbooks. (It would work great for larger study groups too) I feel selfish for not sharing it with the rest of the class, but I'm starting to get burnt out from always helping others and rarely getting any help in return. I'll still help, but I'm not going to offer up something I've put so much time into to a classmate who doesn't even have the decency to say 'thanks'. Anyone else in this situation?
    Last edit by abbythetabby on Oct 13, '06
  12. by   GratefulHeart
    Quote from abbythetabby
    Hey, you're not my study partner are you? I did the same thing this week w/one of my classmates. I use OneNote to drag in bits of my instructor's presentations, the module learning objectives and illustrations. It actually makes an excellent study guide and weighs a heck of a lot less than five textbooks. (It would work great for larger study groups too) I feel selfish for not sharing it with the rest of the class, but I'm starting to get burnt out from always helping others and rarely getting any help in return. I'll still help, but I'm not going to offer up something I've put so much time into to a classmate who doesn't even have the decency to say 'thanks'. Anyone else in this situation?
    O I'd venture to say we're not alone, LOL. There will always be slackers and those of us who work our b*tts off but must have an invisible sucker sign printed on our foreheads - the way we attract those who want a free ride to us. However, my *slacker radar* has become exceptionally fine-tuned these past couple of years, 'cuz sheer survival necessitates that I learn to work smarter, not harder. In the past I have done my 100% and 50% of my partners', and that only leads to burnout and bitterness. Won't do that anymore; need to preserve my mental health.

    I am VERY willing to help those who are trying their best and doing their share, but I'm not going there for the leaches. Since it always takes a while to figure out who's who and I'm in only my first semester of actual nursing, I'm hanging back until I know my classmates better before I partner and invest.
  13. by   Megsd
    I tend to study by myself mostly, but do study groups occasionally with varying groups of people. Some study groups are more productive than others. I always study as much as I feel I need by myself, then go to the study group to pick up tips from my classmates, rehash/assist with learning, and sometimes for the social aspect too. I feel that bonding with my classmates relieves some of my stress and allows me to have (gasp!) fun, while still studying.

    I definitely don't RELY on study groups because sometimes they do end up in deep conversations about leg hair, car accident scars, ex-boyfriends, school stuff, war, TV, etc., etc., etc., etc. But I find them good for reaffirming the info I have studied and for kicking back with friends a little before an exam.

    I am lucky so far in that we don't have too many downers that blame their grades on other stuff. We did take an essay test on Monday and a girl got an 80% and was convinced her grade was due to an off-color comment she made in class. While I do feel the comment was out of line, I assured her it would be unethical for our instructor to give her a bad grade because she doesn't like her. Fortunately she tends to get good grades in our other classes so I don't feel it's a common thing.
  14. by   locolorenzo22
    Thanks all for the tips/comments. It's really nice to know I'm not the only one dealing with this issue. We had clinical today and one of my classmates is consistantly "blah, blah, blah" about things she already knows from having a mom in the hospital with Chrones disease, etc....Well, we all just want to tell her "look we have to learn it too...."
    However, I'm more willing to cut her some slack because she's 18! When I was 18, I definitely didn't have those social skills for groups, especially in what we deal with. I think we're all giving it a week or two, then someone's going to snap.....

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