What HAVE you said to patients???

Pat_Pat RN · Apr 5, 2011

As an old woman (you know, 4'11" 98#) is trying to move me out of the way because, "She's going to go upstairs and check on the kids...." and I'm saying, "No, you are in the hospital remember?" "Oh now don't start with that 'hospital' stuff again." So she winds up her O2 tubing into about a foot long bunch and starts hitting me with it! Then she hits me with the TV remote, then she actually started pushing me (me: 6' 215#). I was completely taken aback! I said, "Now we're not going to do this, you need to goto the bathroom or get back in bed."

"I'm not getting in bed here, I'm going to the bathroom downstairs"

Me, "Look, you are hurting me (that tubing really did sting!) that isn't nice."

I'm sounding real "tough", but it's hard to be "tough" with granny!

I pushed her call button to get me some back-up. Remember she's 4'11.

CNA comes in the room, patient COMPLETE turn around. "Well hi honey, I think I need to go to the bathroom..."

My mouth falls open.

But that is better than the lady that kept saying, "Now don't come in here and kill me." Nothing instills confidence in family walking by in the hallway to hear someone say "Don't try to kill me..."

:smackingf

NurseStephRN · Apr 5, 2011

This is a hospital, not a hotel. I don't have a special donut-shaped pillow for your dad to sit on.

TheCommuter, BSN, RN · Apr 5, 2011

I was working on a busy skilled Medicare unit nearly four years ago and was assigned to a short-term patient who had been giving the entire nursing staff the blues. She would scream, holler, and complain about her medications, finger stick blood sugars, and other issues.

She was angry one morning when I checked her blood sugar at 7:00am instead of 6:30. Breakfast had not been served yet, so I didn't see the justification for her anger. I had about 15 patients that day, and she was not my only diabetic that needed blood sugar checks that morning. In fact, she was one of 8 diabetics.

I admit that I was in a defensive mood that day, so I said something that management would absolutely frown upon: "If you don't like it here, you have the choice of going somewhere else for your care."

ShayRN · Apr 5, 2011

I was in charge on a very busy night. Had a patient at the end of the hallway who was completely obnoxious. She wasn't confused, but was very mean. I could hear her screaming at the nurses and STNAs all the way down the hall. They kept coming to the desk saying she was refusing this, that and everything. Including getting on a gurney to go get a CT scan ordered. Finally, I had enough. I went to her room and told her in no uncertain terms that her behavior was unacceptable and would no longer be tolerated. If she continued being abusive to the staff, security would be called and they would deal with her. If she continued to refuse her tests, her doctor would be called so she could be discharged. However, her disruptive behavior would no longer tolerated on our unit. Next thing I know, the transport people were wheeling her downstairs, she bad looked me the whole way down the hall, but oh well. I did call her doctor and tell him he needed to address her behavior. I don't know what happened after that, I came back a couple of days later and she was gone.

jal1234, LPN, LVN · Apr 5, 2011

"This isn't the Hilton... You get what you choose off the menu!"...

Emergency RN · Apr 5, 2011

the most memorable thing that i'd ever said was not to a patient, but to a visitor, who demanded to be let into a busy emergency department to see someone (who at that point in time wasn't allowed visitors) and was told that he could not be let it. he then shouted, "look at you, so full of yourself, on a power trip drunk with authority..."

before he could finish, i replied, "exactly, so i see that you understand perfectly then, that i would have no reservations whatsoever, in calling the police and having you arrested for criminal trespass, if you so much as even try to set foot past this door?"

he just stood there slack jawed for a few seconds before turning back into the waiting room, which coincidentally, also suddenly became as quiet as a morgue.

it was one of my finest nursing moments, lol...

roser13, ASN, RN · Apr 5, 2011

"So she winds up her O2 tubing into about a foot long bunch and starts hitting me with it! "

I'm sorry - I have no doubt it did sting, but that visual of Granny slinging her O2 tubing around just cracked me up!

:lol2: :lol2: :lol2:

Rabid Response · Apr 5, 2011

I once had a patient who was admitted to my unit with a balloon pump, pa line and quite a number of drips. Unfortunately the cath lab had sent him up to me with no warning and without calling any report. Of course there was a problem with the IABP on his arrival, and three other nurses and I were scrambling to fix the problem before we had to call the MDs and possibly shut down the pump and remove the line. The patient was NPO in case he had to go for emergency surgery. It was a huge clusterf**k, and through it all the patient was complaining that he'd had nothing to eat or drink all day. At first, as always, I explained his npo status and the rationale for it in the most polite way possible. But he just kept on and on about how he had not eaten. His complaining and my explaining (while trying to troubleshoot the iabp and lines and settle him in) went on for about ten minutes. Finally he yelled, "I'm ******* DYING of hunger here and none of you care!" I had absolutely had it and yelled back at him, "Sir, you might very well be dying, but NOT of HUNGER!" I thought the other nurses were going to choke when they heard that. I'm usually very patient, but that guy got on my last nerve. He and I got along pretty well after that, though.

traumalover, RN · Apr 5, 2011

To the frequent flier OD drugseeker repeatedly pushing their call light while we are emergently intubating and putting lines in/starting pressors on my two day post partum septic patient (very sick) to tell me over and over again she can't sleep and needs me to call MD for benzos. "I am busy trying to save someone's life. I am not coming back in here until i am done next door and you're are not getting any more pain meds or downers, so stop bothering us while we do our real work."

Two minutes later hear code blue paged overhead. Patient had gotten out of bed and pushed her own code blue button in room because she knew a doctor would show up. And then she asked him for meds. And then the charge nurse spent five minutes in there and we didn't hear a peep out of her until shift change. Don't know what she said but it worked.

Said but not by me, to a frequent flier who had extubated himself and was leaving AMA while telling us all what a bunch of jerks we were "You're lucky nurse can't carry guns."

honeykrown, MSN, NP · Apr 5, 2011

This isn't. Burger king, you can't have everything ur way

mama_d, BSN, RN · Apr 5, 2011

To the elderly POA of an even more elderly pt while discussing code status:

POA: "Only do all that stuff if she's already dead."

Me: "We only do it if they're dead, that's why it's called resussitation."

Same scenario:

Me: "Look, it isn't like on TV. She codes, she isn't going to make it...she's 98, if she dies can we just let her?"