Quote from treeye
I have given my two weeks notice in and I'm tempting to call off on my last day. I was wondering why my coworkers have been doing this but now I totally understand.
I was treated very differently in my last two weeks: People order lunch take-outs without asking me, they sit at different tables during lunches. One day, I was the only one without an orientee. Those who I considered "my friend" are distancing themselves. I have always been considerate for my coworkers and I get along with most people at work, this does hurt my feelings.
In addition, the morale at my work is very low. I am the 5th nurse quit on my floor in the past two months. We lost more than half of our staff in the past two years. The administration does not care. We worked short for so long and now they finally brought in agency nurses.
anyway, I don't want to burn any bridges but now I know why it has been a tradition at my work to call off on the last day. I love my job but I just hate to be there.
I do understand feeling a bit stung by the "You're not one of us" reaction you described. Saying I understand it and agreeing with it are completely different things though.
The two week notice time period can play itself out a million ways. This is just one of them. Your current coworkers see you as an outsider now. In essence, you are, so no bones to pick there.
I have been in situations though where I was leaving a job (for good reasons, often not because the place I was at was toxic) where I felt I had made a connection with people. When I saw how quickly I became an outsider in their eyes, I resented it. Some things should transcend being at the same workplace, or so I thought.
Truth is, most workplace relations are relations of convenience. Even the ones where we meet the person outside work or share personal experiences or any other number of things that make us believe we've gone beyond a simple situation of coworkers getting along. When my being on their team was near it's end, my usefulness to them too was near an end. I was no longer convenient. I was treated as such.
Your dilemma is not one of finding out whether calling off the last day is a good decision or not. If it were just that, the choice would be easy: Do it if you benefit from it, don't do it if you're only calling off for "revenge".
The choice you are faced with it this: Do you support treating others as though they cease to exist once their usefulness to you ends? Are you someone who believes in friendships of convenience?
Calling off would, in my opinion, further the "people are a convenience" culture you're experiencing. It would be saying: "Since I don't get the social support I want, you're no longer of use to me, and calling off is easier to do. Whether my call off hurts you or not is of no consequence to me."
So, your first decision is whether you want to play their game or not. Calling off is playing their game. The second (and third, and fourth, and infinity) decision you're facing is whether to act like that yourself, or not, the next time this sort of thing presents itself to you. Next time you're leaving a job, perhaps you won't feel so burnt by the reaction of others if you see it for what it is. Also, when you're on the other side of the fence and someone else is the one leaving, you'll perhaps not be like your current coworkers are being.