sexual harrassment

[ChristinaV]

Who would you go to?????

We work at a small close knit facility. Our payroll clerk has been employed here for years and has been groping female employees for YEARS. Most of the women push him away and tend to laugh it off in front of him, Im sure out of embarrasment and fear that he will manipulate the paychecks in some way. Some employees have been more vocal towards him and he leaves them alone for a time but usually resorts back to his old behavior. Lately his behavior has become more disgusting as he now reaches between the legs from behind and gropes private parts then laughs about it. He does this to the aides, nurses and housekeepers. Young and old!!! Problem is he is personal friends with our DON so no one has gone to her. Our new ADON is a very timid woman and the owners are absent. This behavior must stop. It isnt funny! I am a new employee who has been "chosen" to bring this problem to someone who will put an end to it. I have no idea who to go to. One of the employees wants to go to the local police but Im not sure if its a police problem. We cant afford to lose our jobs due to the friendship between our DON and this pervert. Any advice??? I have even spoken to this man about the possiblity of losing his job and possibly his home. I asked if it was worth it. He responded by poking at my breast and walking away. Nothing seems to deter his behavior. What would YOU do??????? Thanks.

[meownsmile, BSN, RN]

I know there have been a lot of good advice on the previous pages,, but time constraints arent going to allow all that reading right now. But,, i can express what we did one place i worked when we had a manager that acted in similar manner. He would walk up and do the "bear hug" thing,, make suggestive comments as employees walked by. It was a place where most of the employees were young and female.

We wrote a long letter explaining our grievances,, his actions, behaviors and comments,, made copies sent it to corperate and his superiors, (in this case id go with the ADON and owners, with the expressed intent to take things further if something wasnt done about the situation immediately. Everyone in the place that had been "victimized" signed it and it was sent by registered mail to make sure that who was supposed to recieve it actually got it.

It didnt take long and he was gone. They knew if they didnt do something quickly they would find themselves in court and they didnt want to have to defend the reputation of their business for one idiot.

Good luck,, go forth and do something about it.

[squeakykitty]

I think you should present each of your co-workers with their very own can of pepper spray......I understand what you are saying about the area in which you live and the type of people you work with.They basically are trapped.People like that feel (are made to feel ) powerless and will put up with alot...Good luck

Love the pepper spray idea. :yelclap:

[ktwlpn, LPN]

I thought of something else today- do you have female residents in your facility that this man could come into contact with? You should make an anonymous call to the dept. of health and the ombudsman.If this guy is so brazen towards your female co-workers what is to stop him from behaving in an inappropriate manners towards the residents? .I think unless the residents are all in locked units then there is a good chance he has crossed the line with them,too.....The complaints will be kept anonymous and they will investigate.Keep us posted

[GregRN]

Love the pepper spray idea. :yelclap:

If it's good enough for astronauts, nurses should be able to use it, too...

[CrunchRN, ADN, RN]

All though we would all like to kick him in the gonads it really is simple.

Complain in writing to HR and admin.

If no action taken then you can a) call the police and file an assault charge or b) take it to an employment attorney or the appropriate agency.

It should be done as soon as there is an occurence.

The reactive stuff is fun to think about, but it won't accomplish waht needs to be accomplished and might even leave YOU open to charges or termination.

I would LOVE to do the kicking for you though!

This has happened for a long time because it has been allowed to happen. That needs to stop.

[aviator411, RN]

I wouldn't do this guy any favors by warning him that a complaint is being filed; he has no doubt been threatened with such in the past. If he does become convinced that some official complaint is being filed he will just clean up his act and try to deny it and you may suddenly find that witnesses willing to put their jobs on the line by testifying against him will become very scarce. You need to get detailed documentation signed by as many of his victims as possible and any other compelling forms of evidence you can before doing anything. You don't want this guy cleaning up his act long enough to get past the crisis and then resuming his old behavior (which he is sure to do); you want him GONE and it will be easy to do if you get some sound legal advice and follow it.

[squeakykitty]

I wouldn't do this guy any favors by warning him that a complaint is being filed; he has no doubt been threatened with such in the past. If he does become convinced that some official complaint is being filed he will just clean up his act and try to deny it and you may suddenly find that witnesses willing to put their jobs on the line by testifying against him will become very scarce. You need to get detailed documentation signed by as many of his victims as possible and any other compelling forms of evidence you can before doing anything. You don't want this guy cleaning up his act long enough to get past the crisis and then resuming his old behavior (which he is sure to do); you want him GONE and it will be easy to do if you get some sound legal advice and follow it.

I would definitely not warn him, and would get documented incidents from your coworkers. Let a lawyer or supervisor be the one to tell him.

[ChristinaV]

Since my original post,the ball has started rolling here with a few disturbing twists. Our social worker was informed of "complaints by several workers", no ones name mentioned. The woman who went to her on our behalf reported back to me that they ARE aware of his behavior and he has in fact done this to our ADON! The DON's choice of handling this matter is to hold an inservice on sexual harrassment! However, and I hope you are all sitting down for this one........for valentines day our DON wants us to make out little cards to our coworkers and tell them why we like working with them. Yesterday when inquiring about how many cards we have all made out, she said......"and for Gods sake dont forget about ******.Yes, the pervert. THIS is why no one has persued the matter seriously. Luckily, I hope for us, they started a new administrator this week. She will be getting a letter about this and also a copy of the law and our rights so she'll know that we KNOW this is NOT sexual harrassment but assault! In the meantime, for me personally, if he touches me again I will call the police. Period.

[tiggerforhim]

Maybe, but where I live, the people that form juries understand that sometimes you have to handle an issue like this yourself. You'd never be convicted of decking a sexual assaulter in the mouth around here.

Of course, people here also understand "He needed killin'."

I agree completely. I also live in the South and "he needed killin'" is somewhat understood.

[txspadequeenRN, BSN, RN]

this is crazy... it is time to go over her head. it has been reported to her and now she wants people to write love letters to him. hang both of them. if you go to his office for whatever reason and he does this to you... call the police from his office. i have a real problem mouth and probably would stand up in your sexual harassment in service and make some comments about this and encourage all that have been offended to join. also. go in a group to the new administrator and complain....

since my original post,the ball has started rolling here with a few disturbing twists. our social worker was informed of "complaints by several workers", no ones name mentioned. the woman who went to her on our behalf reported back to me that they are aware of his behavior and he has in fact done this to our adon! the don's choice of handling this matter is to hold an inservice on sexual harrassment! however, and i hope you are all sitting down for this one........for valentines day our don wants us to make out little cards to our coworkers and tell them why we like working with them. yesterday when inquiring about how many cards we have all made out, she said......"and for gods sake dont forget about ******.yes, the pervert. this is why no one has persued the matter seriously. luckily, i hope for us, they started a new administrator this week. she will be getting a letter about this and also a copy of the law and our rights so she'll know that we know this is not sexual harrassment but assault! in the meantime, for me personally, if he touches me again i will call the police. period.

[txspadequeenRN, BSN, RN]

It is part of the everyday language where I live... The last time a man messed with me ,my husband took him out to the lake in the middle of the night ... Have not seen him sense but I hear he moved far away.....

I agree completely. I also live in the South and "he needed killin'" is somewhat understood.

[nursemike, ASN, RN]

I don't think any attorney is going to consider a sexual harassment inservice an adequate remedy. If you can show, by a "preponderance of evidence" (not as stringent as "beyond a reasonable doubt") you can win monetary damages from your employer in a lawsuit. If your employer retaliates against you in any way, you can sue for that, as well.

If you go to a lawyer, three things are likely to occur before you ever get to court: your employer will settle, the pervert will be gone, and your DON will be gone. No business can afford this sort of exposure.

I really see no reason to wait for it to happen again. If even a couple of your co-workers are willing to testify, you have them nailed.

As viscerally satisfying as physical violence may seem, it isn't the answer, and a subpoena will hurt a lot more.