Take my word for it, nurses find themselves in some pretty unusual situations in the course of their nursing careers. And some of it is pretty funny. At least to other nurses. But, of course, nurses are known for their warped senses of humor. I think it's a kind of protective mechanism that develops over time.
"Hospital Safety" in limerick form,
Remember these,they are the norm.
For all that do; while in school,
Will sit for the pin and not on the stool.
Water or ice on the floor
Are things you should never ignore.
The words you recite
May not be polite
When you land on your posterior.
Before giving meds or IVs,
Be sure to check patient IDs.
For the patient ahead
May be in the wrong bed
While the right one is absentee.
When giving your patients an assist,
Save your back. Avoid doing the twist.
Beg, plead or yelp
But round up some help.
Keep your name off the casualty list.
When you move beds with your chums,
Be kind to your knuckles and thumbs.
Tuck them safely inside
'cause the doors aren't too wide
And smashed hands are quite cumbersome.
When a "sundowner's" tucked in for the night
Be sure that his posey's tied tight.
Or he'll wander around
Till he finally falls down
And an incident report you must write.
If you waken a patient at night,
Please be gentle, don't give him a fright.
And stand back from the bed.
If he's out of his head,
He might try to punch out both your lights.
Writing orders, a doctor from Flaster
Made his pen scribble faster and faster.
He developed a scrawl
That was unreadable.
Left his patients at risk for disaster!
Doctor's orders, concise and specific,
Written clearly, not one hieroglyphic,
Could be read with great ease.
All the nurses were pleased.
They all thought he was terrific ! !
But . . . .
When a doctor writes orders and notes
And you can't figure out what he wrote,
Just be very firm.
Confront the big worm
And shove each worthless page down his throat ! !
Give unusual orders a check.
Confirm them; make sure they're correct.
It's O.K. to give rein
And make use of your brain.
Remember, it's YOUR license and neck.
And the moral of the story is never, ever assume anything!!!!!