Patients boyfriend gets naked - page 7

So I'm working noc shift on a surgical floor and I'm caring for a 19 year old woman who had had neck surgery the day before. Her boyfriend comes to the floor to visit around 4 am which I felt was a... Read More

  1. by   Happeetxn
    When I was going thru nursing school I worked as a monitor tech and every so often I would see a patient go tachy and I would call into the room "Mr or Mrs so and so are you ok?" and the replies I got were comical "Ummmm yeah uhhh were are you?" or in a very fast sentence "I am fine are these rooms monitored?" or the giggling because they just got caught having sex. It was bad when they didn't answer and I would call the nurse or CNA to go check on the patient, and they would walk in on them. Now in 2 1/2 years this only happened a handful of times, by no means would I call it common occurence.
    As for the right or wrong aspect I guess I am siding with the "It's ok crowd" because of Maslows and the stress of being ill and out of your normal surroundings and feeling the closeness of the one who loves you.
    As for me personally, there is no way in God's green earth that I would have sex in the hospital after knowing / seeing what has been on those matresses. To my wife "Honey I appreciate the thought but I'll be ok til' we get home. I promise"
    Oh and before I the person who was working in PP w/ the young girl and pulled the Code Blue switch.......What great quick thinking on your part!
  2. by   paraiba T
    you can feel close to someone without having sexual intercourse. if a patient can only feel close to their so when it involves inserting a into slot b, they probably aren't that close to begin with. i guess i'm just a prude .
  3. by   Midwest4me
    Quote from caliotter3
    as a cna, i worked at a ltc facility where i was told that a man would come in occasionally and rape his wife. she had a stroke and was paralyzed and could not speak, but her eyes told everything a person needed to know. the tears would flow after her husband left. there were 3 other residents in the room. they had to put up with this. he would close the door and pull the curtain around her area. the nurses would act like "see no evil, hear no evil, etc." but they could certainly talk about it. a few years later, guess who ended up as a resident in the same facility? i actually heard some of the nurses stating what they had in store for him and what kind of care he was (was not) getting. they were being vicious about it and said he deserved every bit of what he was getting. at least the poor soul, that was his wife, did not have to endure his "husbandly" rapes any longer. he could not get to her room.
    :angryfire :angryfire :angryfire i was incensed when i read this!!! every person in that facility who knew this was going on had the duty to report it to the authorities. there is no excuse for that to have occurred even one time! that poor lady could not give her consent; her husband was definitely taking advantage of her.
  4. by   cappuccino
    Quote from drifternurse
    :angryfire :angryfire :angryfire i was incensedwhen i read this!!! every person in that facility who knew this was going on had the duty to report it to the authorities. there is no excuse for that to have occurred even one time! that poor lady could not give her consent; her husband was definitely taking advantage of her.
    i agree. how could that go on without anyone reporting it to the authorities? that's unbelievable
  5. by   justme1972
    Quote from cappuccino
    I agree. How could that go on without anyone reporting it to the authorities? That's unbelievable
    I agree, in my state, a wife can be raped by her husband, and this is the clearest cut case of rape I have ever heard of. I cannot believe the staff at this hospital turned a blind eye and allowed this woman to be repeatedly violated and did nothing!
  6. by   Midwest4me
    Quote from wildmountainchild

    when i was in the hospital after getting out of icu and being kept for an extra few days, i wanted some time w/ my hubby. after all the emotionally charged days and nights spent wondering what the heck was going on it was a relief to experience some real intimacy. we had a private room with a full size bed.....what do you expect?

    we placed the chair in front of the door to ensure privacy and no one was ever the wiser (until now). we are humans, and humans are sexual beings. that doesn't stop just because you're in the hospital. sex can help with the healing process, i really believe that. and no i'm not going to wait until i get home because i'm still young and in love enough to let the moment take me.

    sex isn't gross or unnatural and i'm not going to apologize for it. we are two consenting adults and what we do behind closed and barricaded doors is our business.
    prude??? nope...just too freaking old to be bothered with it anymore(thankfully). i'm a professional and firmly believe that sex crap does not belong in the hospital....and pts' hospital room doors should not be barricaded for any reason.those who have to 'let the moment take" them can postpone it until they get home. it is after all a public place.
  7. by   GardenDove
    I can't believe anyone thinks that you are a prude if you think sex should happen in a private place. It's totally disrespectful of others. Really, how much more are we supposed to put up with from families? They will take over a unit, their kids running amock, turning the pt's room into a party, with fast food everywhere. Now they want to have sex!

    It's gotten out of control! No, you're not a prude if you don't want to walk in on people having sex in the hospital!
  8. by   Marie_LPN, RN
    Originally Posted by wildmountainchild
    If being completely opposed to possibly walking in on my pt. and their whatever going at it makes me a prude, so be it.

    Last i checked, i've not seen a doctor write an order for the pt. to have sex while they are a pt.

    Sex isn't gross or unnatural and I'm not going to apologize for it.

    Sex may be natural, but so is cow dung, and neither of the two will be something i'll be fine and dandy walking into.
  9. by   GardenDove
    Yes, Marie, lots of things are 'natural', so is squatting in the forest to relieve one's self, but there's a time and place for everything. Really, our society is getting so self absorbed and vulgar, no one has any respect for the sensitivities of others.
  10. by   caliotter3
    Barricading room doors is a violation of the fire code and should not be allowed under any circumstances.
  11. by   ayla2004
    yes this should have been reported and the nurses failing to do so, failing to be advocates is very wrong.
    however if the husband then suffers poor care by these same nurses who are making up for their lack of action, when he then becomes a patient is also wrong

    If you have a very good idea its rape deal with it at the time thats the professional legal and for me moral action
    Last edit by ayla2004 on Mar 11, '07
  12. by   Liddle Noodnik
    Umm, why are sexual relations being compared to defecation? I can understand not wanting to see and hear what should be private, but I think that's kinda gross to COMPARE the two!
  13. by   nautt
    Quote from chudder
    Call security... seriously? When my ex-girlfriend was in the hospital, her nurse encouraged me to sleep in bed with her. My ex asked her about patients having sex and the nurse said there were no grounds to judge them on it as long as the room was not shared by another patient. Are there guidelines on this? Honestly, I could see sex being a really good idea for some patients.
    well, to some, it could be a coping-stress attitude! :trout: