How do you last?

Nurses General Nursing

Published

How does a constantly stressed out nurse last for over a year at the job? How do you do it? I'm not even a nurse and I never last at stressful jobs.

Specializes in Neuroscience.

Nursing is stressful, especially in the first few months at a new job. You'll have days when you think "I'm never going to get this" and days when you just want to give up. But the longer you do the job, the better you get at it. You'll start to have similar situations with patients that mimic the ones you've had before, and you'll know what to do. Knowing what to do and becoming competent at your job is a great feeling, and the stress slowly melts away.

You'll learn to leave things at work, to let the little things go, and to acknowledge that you can't change other people. You'll admit you don't know everything and that takes quite a burden off your shoulders!

There will still be stressful nights, but they don't seem that bad. You'll be amazed what you can handle after you've been on the same floor for a year. Confidence comes back and you realize that you've got this.

Nursing is similar to AA. Take it one day at a time and believe in a higher power.

Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).

Good enquiry, Neywel! You've received some great responses.

Missmollie is very Zen in her approach to recognizing and dealing with stress. She seems to have integrated herself into her work.

Been there, done that equates dealing with stress through a 12 step philosophy. There are worthwhile instructions to follow in a 12 step program that can be applied to any problem situation.

Several years ago, I attended a seminar on stress where the speaker said, "You learn to deal with stress by experiencing stress".

Stress can also balance out a life. Stress can inspire. I deal with stress by expressing it in my Art. Stress has inspired me to exercise. A stressful situation is put in better perspective when I'm bicycling up a killer hill. Stressful situations are better perceived in the throes of physical discomfort.

Thanks for your enquiry, Neywel!

Nursing is similar to AA. Take it one day at a time and believe in a higher power.[/quote

THAT is a good summary

Desensitization/gradual exposure to the healthcare work environment, I found working in a hospital environment before and during nursing school made working as a nurse less stressful for me.

Specializes in Colorectal Surgery.

Self care (whatever that is for you: netflix, long bubble bath, dance class, nature walk, etc)

SOME form of exercise, whether it is just trying to get 10,000 steps a day, or something super intense like crossfit

Good support system, whoever that may be. If its family, friends, nursing school buddies..you need to have a shoulder to cry on at times and someone to tell you how great you are :-)

Also i want to say very candidly, imo this is the most important thing: CONSTANT HIGH LEVELS OF ANXIETY AND STRESS IS NOT NORMAL. As someone who lived with intense stress/severe anxiety for YEARS... Do not hesitate to seek professional help! Therapists and psych doctors can teach you awesome coping skills, mental tricks, breathing techniques, etc to help you learn to manage stress! Whether or not you feel that you might benefit from meds, professionals can really help with coping skills!!

Best of luck to you :-)

Specializes in ICU.

Things get better the longer you stay in a job. That being said, I still have some nights where I want to scream "I QUIT!!!" and run out the door, especially when there are high-strung family members firing questions at me and second guessing every step I take all night long.

When that happens, I just realize I need to suck it up and do my job. I hit my feelings with some cold, hard logic. My bills won't pay themselves, and constantly job hopping would look horrible on my resume and I wouldn't be able to find new work. Not to mention - what's even more stressful than staying at an already stressful job is being the new kid on the block on orientation at a new but equally stressful job.

Something stressful where I at least know where the supplies are located and who to call in case of emergencies is vastly superior to a high stress job when it's high stress and I don't know who any of the physicians are or where any of the equipment is located.

I look forward to the future - in my case, later this year I will be able to start training to work rapid response, so I might have whole shifts where I don't have an assignment at all and just respond to emergencies instead, which would be awesome - and I won't get to do that if I leave now.

Sometimes I also think about how entitled I must be to be sitting here and thinking about my "stress" when I have a job with decent pay, a nice car, and the freedom to not watch my budget all that closely, while people in other jobs struggle to make enough to keep their lights on. Thinking about all the good things my job brings me makes me feel more satisfied.

I try to get adequate sleep. It always seems to help when I can be well-rested before I descend into the abyss. A little diphenhydramine never hurt anybody. I take it almost every day to make sure I rest.

Also, getting a PRN job helped. Just having my foot in another door, knowing I could just up and quit my full time job at any time, made a huge difference. I absolutely know if something happens at my full time job I am okay. I don't have to go through the hiring process anywhere else. I would just have to tell my manager at my PRN job I wanted to go full time, and they have so many spots available and I have such good performance reviews there she would be thrilled to bump me up to FT status. I felt more job satisfaction at my full time job immediately knowing that I have another lifeline and I don't HAVE to stay there if I don't want to.

I was fired from my first job before I hit the 1 year mark, but I was looking on transferring to somewhere else after a year anyway. What kept me going was the fact that I didn't want to become a homeless bum. I saw a lot of the homeless at my first job, and I didn't want to end up like them. Winters in my city are awful, and to be homeless in that climate is a death sentence.

Specializes in Case mgmt., rehab, (CRRN), LTC & psych.
What kept me going was the fact that I didn't want to become a homeless bum.
I concur. I remained at stressful jobs because no one else would pay for my housing or put food on the table if I abruptly quit without other employment lined up.

I experienced hunger, disconnected utilities and a repossessed vehicle as a child due to my parents' financial mismanagement and paycheck-to-paycheck existence. I'll be darned if I allow that to happen in my adult life because I found a job too stressful.

Sometimes you realize that hitting bottom (e.g. homelessness) may produce more anxiety and stress than a solidly middle-income job as a nurse.

Specializes in M/S, Pulmonary, Travel, Homecare, Psych..

I'm going to say it, because it needs said.

The key ingredient for me was to learn balance. You hear a lot about how nurses stop taking care of themselves, but not much on why they do this and how to avoid it yourself.

Don't add extra stress to yourself by thinking you have to be a shinning star princess superhero.

Specializes in Hospice.

Set limits. Firmly and often, if necessary.

Learn how to say "No, I can't" and realize that it it doesn't have to be followed by "I'm sorry".

Just because the staffing coordinator sees nothing wrong with contacting you 20 times on your day off to guilt you into working an extra shift because they don't plan well, it doesn't mean you actually have to respond. Not even with a "No, I can't". The most useful saying I have ever read is "Lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part".

I knew none of this when I started nursing 37 years ago. After decades of abuse and trying to please everyone, which resulted in pleasing no one, including myself, I finally learned.

If I don't take care of myself first, I won't be able to take care of my patients. Plain and simple.

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