Got called "stupid" at work

Nurses General Nursing

Published

I am a nurse's aid at a LTC facility. I've been here since January. I took 4 weeks of class then was assigned to a hall on the 3-11 shift.

The CNA that trained me on this floor is very bossy. I don't work under her anymore but she tends to boss me around, run the show on the floor.

I've had problems with the gal. She has singled me out to boss me around; I can take criticism when I know it's for my own good and presented in a decent way, but she talks down to me all the time. She's 34. I'm 51.

I'm beginning to wonder about her. She's been a Personal Care Home Manager, a Medical Assistant and now she's working as a CNA at lower wages, I'm sure.

Tonight, when we got assignments, the nurse passed that chore on to Ms. Bossy. She asked if I wanted to do a certain hall that I've never done on my own and have only worked it 2-3 times. I said yeah, I'll never learn it otherwise. Ms. Bossy said so sweetly at that point "If you need any help, just ask"

Well later in the evening before last rounds, I was having trouble with one resident and went to Ms. Bossy. She took over and talked to me in a demeaning, irritable tone of voice. She was explaining things and saying "Now you watch what I'm doing." "Now I want you to remember all of this." It was said like a mother would talk to a misbehaving child. She didn't have to be so bossy or irritable - remember, she offered the assistance when shift began.

She ordered me to get something for the resident and I accidently shut the door too hard and was taking the soiled laundry out of the room, got sidetracked by someone else for a second and forgot the bib for the resident (I'm afraid Ms. Bossy makes me nervous and I screw up.) I go back, Ms. Bossy is at the door and angrily says "Where is the bib?" By then, I had had it and I angrily and louder than ususal replied "OK, I'll get the bibb."

After the resident was finished, I got a lecture from Ms. Bossy about how I will never ever yell at her again and how I had asked her for help and how she had helped me. And I said well quit talking to me like I'm 10 years old and then she said:

"WELL, IF YOU WEREN'T SO STUPID . . . . . (and I don't recall or heard the rest of the sentence.)

Boy, talk about one angry aid here. I don't like her and she doesn't like me and that's fine but don't get personally insulting with me especially in front of the nurse and the other aids which is where we were when she called me stupid.

So soon as I got home I typed up a nice little letter to the 3-11 shift Nursing Supervisor and the In-Service Supervisor explaining the events and requesting that I be switched to another shift. I don't even want to work the same shift as this b!tch.

I also requested an informal appraisal and stated that if, in fact, I wasn't cutting it (nice word for if I really was stupid), then it made no sense for me to continue to work at that Home and in the Nurse's Aid profession.

I just want away from this woman.

If we had just had a disagreement about how we talk to each other that would've been the end of it; but she personally attacked me and that's going to far.

Tomorrow I plan to give the letters to the Supervisors.

Suggestions please - am I doing the right thing? Is there somewhere here where I was wrong? When the door slammed, I went back and apologized for closing the door too hard.

I've tried my best to do my job; I don't talk about other workers; I want to learn. This particular gal seems to lead all the aids around by the nose. No one on the shift came to me - they all hovered with Ms. Bossy. I felt very alone.

Good for you Jan! Keep on the high road and you will come out of this looking great while Ms. Bossy will look like the trite, hate filled person she is. The suits have got to have her number. We have a few in my place like that and they keep them around. Can't figure it out for the life of me!

Good luck and keep documenting and following the chain of command. If you get nowhere with the supervisor immediately over you let that supervisor know you want to meet with the next one up and so on. The more hard facts you have the better. You sound like you conduct yourself in a calm and professional manner so that will score points for you too!

First off, what did the nurse who was nearby do when this cena called you stupid? I am the most lax nurse in my facility. I hate confrentations, I hate writting ppl up...basicly I suck at discipline!

My cenas know this and push my limits freg, but they also know that i will stick up for them to anyone. All the cenas on all the shifts know that i would not tolerate this behavior from any of them and they know i would not tolerate it from another nurse. I can be very territorial when it comes to my staff, my residerts, and my unit to the point that my DON has told my i act like a spoiled 2yo who refuses to share her toys. thats me :-)))

I've worked LTC for 16yrs and this is not a new thing. You did the right thing. If you enjoy your job despite the other cena then don't let her run you off!! Next time she starts in just tell her.....If you have a problem with what I'm doing you need to talk to my nurse about it. then just walk away. Don't allow anyone to treat you with disrespect. You do a job that requires a very special person to do, it requires skill but more importantly it requiers a person with a big heart, someone who is caring, compassionate, and loveing. Hold your head up high and say what i say.....I'm the best at this job (wink) just ask me I'll tell ya!!!! LOL

Dee

I don't have to work with Ms. Bossy anymore! The nurse supervisors moved me to another wing of the home.

And the ladies I am working with are all around my age (51). I gave the documentation I typed up to the 3-11 supervisor and the Inservice Supervisor who oversees training and placement of new staff. She said she will never ever place a new aid with Ms. Bossy.

She also let me know that I was not the first to voice complaints about that woman.

I'm looking forward to my stomach settling down and doing my work without having to have one eye on the door waiting for her to storm in to complain about my work.

Thanks again to all who supported me with this!

Jan I'm an evening shift supervisor in LTC and what she did was terrible if you can't give respect to the people you work with yes with then you don't need to be there. You are absolutely doing the right thing. You need to report this abuse and have every right to be treated with respect for your own professionaalism and hard work.

Congratulations Jan!! I'm so glad this worked out for you...now you can relax and learn..... away from this witch, and be ready for your upcoming test! Good luck!

You should feel proud you handled this so professionally. :)

Specializes in LTC/Peds/ICU/PACU/CDI.
originally posted by janmae1950

i don't have to work with ms. bossy anymore! the nurse supervisors moved me to another wing of the home.

and the ladies i am working with are all around my age (51). i gave the documentation i typed up to the 3-11 supervisor and the inservice supervisor who oversees training and placement of new staff. she said she will never ever place a new aid with ms. bossy.

she also let me know that i was not the first to voice complaints about that woman.

i'm looking forward to my stomach settling down and doing my work without having to have one eye on the door waiting for her to storm in to complain about my work.

thanks again to all who supported me with this!

i'm just wondering :confused: why miss bossy is even still there, especially being this isn't the first time someone has :mad: complained about her.

anyway... :balloons: congrats & hurray!!! hope you'll be happy in your new location...& again...good luck :blushkiss with your pending cna exam!!!

This will sound immature, but I'm going to post it anyway! Go to your job and provide those patient's with quality care and be smiling every step. I have found that the best revenge is to be happy, show everyone just how much you love working there. Let them know that the b---- isn't important enough to cause you concern. Pamper those patient and they will love you back. You will get compliments and praise and that my friend, will just kill that pitiful excuse for a healthcare worker. I hate to think how she treats those that depend on her for their care. Being happy with your situation is the sweetest revenge. You might just run that gal off!

originally posted by skm-nursiepooh

ps, how's your dad:kiss...i hope he's doing fine.

good luck in this most upsetting situation....and in your re-test!!!

thank you for asking about dad.

he has had 3 surgeries over the course of a month and 1/2. his right artery was 90% accluded (sp?). the doctor operated on his neck first and then in april operated on his thigh and then did a by-pass on his lower leg a few days later.

he spent a week in the rehab unit of the hospital. he's back in his home at assisted living and is doing very well.

i hope that now the stress of working with bossy is past i will have more energy to help him and just be there for him.

the next cna test is scheduled for 5/23. i'm praying every day that nothing major happens till after this is over!

Hey Jan, glad to hear things are better for you. Been reading everyone elses posts and didn't have anything to add at the time. All good advice given.

By the way I live in McCandless, but lived in Franklin Park a good while, my dad still lives there.

Good luck on your test!!!!

My opinion, for what it's worth, is that too many people are getting involved at work. Do your job, overlook Ms. Bossy, do not return sarcasm for HER stupidity, and ignore it. Like many has said, there's always SOMEBODY at every job looking to cause trouble. Just do your job, your supervisors will notice, and so will the "stupid" one. Just smile, smile and smile.

I have been a manager for over 15 years and most recently

was a supervisor of a geriatric unit with CNA's . I applaud you

for not gossiping, or backbiting with the incident. You also have

a lot of courage to stay in that situation. I would say if manage-

ment is backing you and doing something about the situation, then it might be worth working through that stress even though

you donot deserve it. I know there are always 2 sides to the

story, and we have only heard yours. However, those kind of

situations should not be tolerated at work, and if management

is not going to back or support you, then you will have to make

a decision about how much you are willing to tolerate at work,

and live with to keep yourself happy. Your co-worker is not

going to change at anyone else's will unfortunately. Do what

makes you content, because work takes up one heck of a chunk

of our lives! Daisy Mae

Yeah Jan! Way to go! You really can't lose when you handle yourself with the grace and dignity you apparently did! I'm glad it worked out for you and for the patients in the facility where you work. You are clearly an asset to the place!

Congrats!

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