Funniest Slips

Nurses General Nursing

Published

Sometimes staying professional is a challenge!

What's the funniest thing you've accidentally (or purposefully) said to a patient or family?!

My Story: I had one of those patients that is perfectly capable of doing things on his own but just wanted all of us to do everything for him and be a pervert. So he called me in to help him use the urinal for the 8th time, so I walked in, grudgingly put his junk in the urinal for him without a word, and then when he was done I started to walk out. He called back to me "What, don't be rude, no conversation?"... without thinking I turned around and said "Really you want me to have a nice chat like I'm not standing there holding your dick for you?"

He looked at me shocked.. I realized what I said and quickly corrected myself LOL but man.. sometimes when you lose patience, sometimes things just blurt out!

Specializes in School Nursing, Pediatrics.

When I first started as an RN I was working on a med/surg oncology unit (this was in the early 1990's) I had a patient come off the elevator post surgery for a cervical cancer (she was young) and it was a very aggressive cancer, a very sad situation, her parents were there, her Husband was there and everyone was crying, having gotten the terrible news that "they got what they could but it is a very bad cancer".

Well, I look up at the husband, and I say "Joe? It that you? He says "YES OMG, how are you?" and I blurt out right in front of everyone "I didn't recognize you with your clothes on!!" The looks were CRAZY!!

Until I explained that Joe and I used to lifeguard together at the pool at the university, so we only ever saw each other in bathing suits! LOL At least that broke up some of the sadness with laughter.

When I first started as an RN I was working on a med/surg oncology unit (this was in the early 1990's) I had a patient come off the elevator post surgery for a cervical cancer (she was young) and it was a very aggressive cancer, a very sad situation, her parents were there, her Husband was there and everyone was crying, having gotten the terrible news that "they got what they could but it is a very bad cancer".

Well, I look up at the husband, and I say "Joe? It that you? He says "YES OMG, how are you?" and I blurt out right in front of everyone "I didn't recognize you with your clothes on!!" The looks were CRAZY!!

Until I explained that Joe and I used to lifeguard together at the pool at the university, so we only ever saw each other in bathing suits! LOL At least that broke up some of the sadness with laughter.

One of our cardiologists yelled this down the hallway to me when I was at the hospital as a visitor. So many strange looks...

Specializes in Med/Surg/Infection Control/Geriatrics.

Poor kid! LOL

Specializes in Med/Surg/Infection Control/Geriatrics.

It was shift change from Days to P.M.s, and I was on P.M.s, I had my notes in my pocket, dubbed my Brain Sheet, and it fell out without me realizing it. When I discovered the loss, I quietly leaned over to my colleague and whispered, "I've lost my "Brains." There was a confused and sweet elderly lady sitting in a recliner at the nurses station so we could keep an eye on her better. She whispered back, "Oh, so have I." Bless her!

oops!!!!! Too funny.

I once told an amputee that he "didn't have a leg to stand on". I was mortified. He thought it was hysterical.

I don't make this slip anymore: Is this your wife? No, fill in the blank, it's always the girlfriend the wife doesn't know exists, daughter, great aunt, elderly next door neighbor or Sunday School teacher.

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