Quote from Alicia18
Hi, all, I feel kind of uncomfortable posting this because I hate talking about people behind their backs, but I think I need help. I work with this other CNA on night shift at a nursing home/retirement home every once in awhile, and every time I finish working with her (where I work, the night shift nursing staff is two CNAs and that's it) on the floor I come home upset. Friday night has to have been my worst night with her. If I made a mistake, or didn't do something the way she thought it should be done, she would yell at me -- literally -- whether we were alone or with the patients
. Naturally, I kept getting more upset, and therefore more flustered -- and thus I kept on making more mistakes because I couldn't think clearly. The worst was when we were putting one lady to bed and she yelled at me right there in the room. I finished what I had to do, and left the room, furious and nearly in tears. :angryfire She apologised about an hour before the shift was over, when we were alone. I appreciated the apology, but I don't think that she will keep herself from yelling the next time. I'm 18 and have only worked in the health care field about five months, and only then on Fridays and weekends. I know that I don't have as much experience as she does, but I don't think I deserve being yelled at in this way -- other people work with me, and they seem able to work with me without making me feel stupid. I have been raised to respect my elders, and this lady is old enough to be my mom. How can I address this issue respectfully when she does it again? I don't want to embarress her like she has me.
It doesn't matter that this lady is old enough to be your mom. Respect is earned, not guaranteed because of one's age. To earn respect, one must show it.
Make an appointment with the co-worker off the clock. Perhaps over lunch, where you are equals, not an experienced CNA and a newbie. In a calm, adult manner, let her know that you will not continue to accept her treatment of you. Don't get emotional, just state the objective facts.
For example, "On Friday, you yelled at me in front of Mrs. Smith, causing me to become flustered, and the resident to get upset. I realize that I forgot to bring a gown into her room, but that was not an emergency, nor did it cause any safety hazard, and it would have been easily corrected had you not caused everyone to become upset by yelling."
"I realize that I'm still learning, and I appreciate your positive, constructive input, but will no longer tolerate your abusive behavior. If you have a problem to discuss with me, I expect you to do it in private. If you have a good word to say to me, then by all means, do it publicly! And I'll do the same for you."
"I hope we can work together professionally from now on."
I suspect that this will help. I've encountered co-workers much like the one you describe, and they are basically on a power trip, testing you to see how much c**p you will put up with. Then they dish up just as much as they think they can get away with. By setting limits up front, you spoil their game.
If this is not effective, then you may be forced to go to your supervisor, but I don't recommend that as a first option, for a couple of reasons. First of all, bullies see weakness in co-workers who go to the supervisor with every problem, and her behavior toward you is likely to worsen if she is spoken to by the supervisor. Secondly, you state that you work only limited hours, so even though the co-worker is out of line, she is likely to curry the favor of the supervisor because she is a warm body working more hours than you.
Good luck standing up for yourself!