Another Nurse Hijacks My Patient and Family

Nurses General Nursing

Published

Specializes in Critical Care.

I have been a nurse for 9 years and have never encountered this situation. I have experience in different areas of nursing; but mainly critical care, SDU/PCU, and telemetry. For the past three years, I worked as an agency nurse. Two months ago, I decided that I wanted a "home" and took a permanent job.

I have been off of orientation for about 3 weeks. The floor that I work on is known to be difficult, but the beauty of it is that most of the staff work well together and almost everyone is willing to lend a helping hand to a co-worker.

I apologize in advance, sometimes I tend to get wordy when I write; but as soon as I got off of orientation, I was assigned some very "difficult" patients and family members and spent a lot of time "putting out fires". Other nurses have also pointed this out to me. Don't know if this was purposeful or not. However, don't care. After working as an agency nurse and a charge nurse in the past, I can handle it, even though it has been stressful.

My problem: A nurse who tries too hard to help me. I am having a difficult time with this, because I truly believe that she has good intentions. However, today, I think she crossed the line, and I know I need to nip it in the bud. I was doing a discharge, and the family members (8) had many questions, which kept me in the room for almost a half hour. During this time, I got a phone call (we carry phones) that family members of another patient had some concerns. Told the secretary to let them know I would get to them ASAP. In the meantime, this other nurse chose to start addressing their concerns (she has not cared for this patient before). Also, without knowing the dynamics of this patient, she told the free charge nurse that a medication needed ordered. There was a reason the docs were holding it. The charge nurse made a call to one of the doc's (consulting) requesting this medication and was denied (she had no clue that this doc had told the patient he would not order this med...I could have told her). She then called the primary and got a one time dose, reluctantly. This is my patient! I didn't even know this was happening!

Next, I take the concerned family members into a private area to talk. This other nurse asks me if I need her help. I say no. I was addressing their issues, and they informed me that the patient was doing something harmful to himself in his room. The other nurse than came in (I assume to rescue me, because I was talking to them for + 20 minutes), told me about the one time dose, and I needed her to waste with me (which I didn't) before our shift ended. Out in the hallway, she tells me about what the patient is doing in his room. I say, "Yes, just found out by talking to the family." So I get the med, go to MY patient's room and other nurse is standing outside the patient's bathroom door and tells me me to hold off giving him this med, because she needs to talk to MY patient about how "he is killing himself." I was flabbergasted. I had to leave the room before I said something to her I would regret. Cooled myself off for a minute then went back into the room. I politely told her that I needed to give the med that she thought was emergent NOW. She could tell I was angry with her, but she looked like she was clueless as to why.

So I guess my question: Has anyone ever experienced anything like this? Totally new to me after 9 years of nursing. Any suggestions of how to deal with this nurse in the future. I believe she means well, and I don't want to alienate her.

Just tell her the truth. "I know you are trying to help, but it's not helping."

Specializes in ER.

Yes, I've experienced similar, and it's ANNOYING!

She's a legend in her own mind and needs to be put in her place.

Specializes in Case mgmt., rehab, (CRRN), LTC & psych.

Yes, I've worked with a nurse who meddled into the affairs of my patients without really knowing the whole story. It's aggravating. She did it because she secretly felt the other nurses were too lazy or incompetent to care for their patients.

She eventually hung herself with her own rope by removing another nurse's patient from the floor for two hours. This other nurse had no idea where the patient was and reported it to the chief nursing officer, who issued a final written warning to the meddlesome nurse.

This is unacceptable and needs to stop now. This type of behavior undermines the primary nurse, reinforces attempts to split staff, and can result in medication errors or other mistakes because the nurse who is trying to "help" does not know the patient.

The first step is for you to talk to this nurse face to face. Tell her that you appreciate her willingness to help, but that in the future, she needs to check in with you first. If speaking with her does not result in the desired change in behavior, then take it up the food chain to the charge nurse next time it happens, at the time that it happens. If the episode is repeated again, then take it to your manager in the form of a formal, written complaint documenting each episode using objective language and leaving any emotion out of of it.

It's one thing to help one another as part of working as a team, and this is appropriate behavior. It's an entirely different thing to insert oneself into a situation without knowledge of the patient situation and without checking in with the primary nurse first to see if they even want/need assistance.

Specializes in Medical-Surgical/Float Pool/Stepdown.

So how exactly is she juggling her own Pt load effectively?

+ Add a Comment