Ahh, drama. Please help me out!

  1. Ok Ladies and Gents,

    I feel so goofy posting this, but here I go.

    A week ago I put in my resignation at work. Oh man, my manager was a total snot face about it. I expected her to be that way because that is how she is about most things. I put my resignation in because I landed a Federal Job 4 hours away.

    Well, after I put in my resignation, the Federal job called and said they had some bad news. My start date won't be until 2 months from now because of XYZ.

    I called my manager and asked if I could still work on her unit. I didn't tell her I will be quitting again in 2 months, I just asked to take my 2 weeks notice back. She did.

    Well, a couple days later, I got another call from the Fed Job and as it turns out, I can start in a month. They were able to get things expedited, blah blah blah. I told them how unfiar this is to my soon-to-be old employer, but I didn't want to rock the cradle too much because I am really looking forward to a nice salary with every weekend and holiday off and the excellent benefits.

    So now, I have to put in another resignation. I am only giving 2 weeks again because I have to be out of my apartment by the end of the month and I need time to move the distance, get settled in my new community, etc.

    I am going to send my manager an email, and I think I will also call after I know that she's read it. She is going to blow fire at my name. What should I say in my email? Should I call her also? If yes, what should I say when I call her and she is being nasty to me? She can't give me a bad reference over this can she?
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    About raindrop

    Joined: Dec '04; Posts: 549; Likes: 199
    from US

    19 Comments

  3. by   Riseupandnurse
    I am so sorry for you but I think what you did was unfair to your current employer. Please don't send her an e-mail. Go in and face her and take your lumps. At the very least offer a 4 weeks' notice. You may need this bridge some day; why burn it?
  4. by   elkpark
    As long as your previous employer doesn't lie about you, yes, she can give you a bad reference if she chooses. Most places limit themselves to reporting your hire and separation dates and whether or not you're eligible for rehire, but what you've described might well also lead the agency to flag your file as ineligible for rehire. You have sort of screwed them over, although you're obviously not doing it maliciously. It might have been best to just suck it up and tough out the extra two months in the first place (and, as it turns out, you wouldn't have had to, anyway).

    Federal jobs are great, but it can be a rocky road to actually getting started in one! Good luck with the new position.
  5. by   Whispera
    Don't do it by email. Lots of people don't read their email regularly, and besides, it's rather cowardly.
  6. by   sissiesmama
    Well, I think I have to agree with the other posters, I wouldn't send an email. The manager may at least appreciate it a little more if you do it in person, have a sit down with her - that way at least you can convey to her that you appreciate her, or your job there, ect.

    It might not be just burning a bridge, more sticking some C4 under that sucker and blowing it off the map, as my dh says.

    Good luck to you, I hope it goes well, with the old and the new.

    Anne, RNC
  7. by   tpanative
    Frankly I don't think you've done anything wrong. I would go to your manager in person, as others have suggested. All you have to do is be honest with them. It's your manager's responsibility to act like an adult in this situation, that burden lies not on you. Retaliation (in any form) is illegal, remember that.
  8. by   Straydandelion
    I would try to compromise with both... let your NEW employer know you are VERY excited about the job but will be longer then the two weeks due to their change of plans originally and your postition of being fair to the employer you are leaving by giving her more notice to find a replacement. IMO you should have indicated to her the other employment plans had changed and not indicated you had changed your mind on leaving. *shrugs*
    At this point I would now talk in person to your present employer (no matter her attitude, at least you would be professional), let her know you are still planning on leaving but would give her more notice so she can find someone else easier and give her a month notice letting your soon to be employer know you can be there in a month and hope they understand you would like to be fair to everyone.
  9. by   gonzo1
    You need to pull up your "big girl" panties and turn in your resignation the correct and traditional way. This is usually a short letter, followed by a face to face. Don't be a coward.
    That said, you do not owe your current employer more than that and you have a right to happily take any new job that will enhance your life and your wallet.
    But step up to the plate and do it brave, and do it right.
  10. by   diane227
    You need to offer an apology to your current employer,present a corrected version of your letter of resignation and just get out of that job as soon as you can. It is not a good situation. You will not be able to resolve things between yourself and your current manager.
  11. by   libnat
    Sticky situation, I wouldn't give more than 2 weeks simply because they will prolly be made hell now with no chance of ever being hired back there anyway.
  12. by   TessaMae
    Quote from raindrop
    ok ladies and gents,

    i feel so goofy posting this, but here i go.

    a week ago i put in my resignation at work. oh man, my manager was a total snot face about it. i expected her to be that way because that is how she is about most things. i put my resignation in because i landed a federal job 4 hours away.

    well, after i put in my resignation, the federal job called and said they had some bad news. my start date won't be until 2 months from now because of xyz.

    i called my manager and asked if i could still work on her unit. i didn't tell her i will be quitting again in 2 months, i just asked to take my 2 weeks notice back. she did.

    well, a couple days later, i got another call from the fed job and as it turns out, i can start in a month. they were able to get things expedited, blah blah blah. i told them how unfiar this is to my soon-to-be old employer, but i didn't want to rock the cradle too much because i am really looking forward to a nice salary with every weekend and holiday off and the excellent benefits.

    so now, i have to put in another resignation. i am only giving 2 weeks again because i have to be out of my apartment by the end of the month and i need time to move the distance, get settled in my new community, etc.

    i am going to send my manager an email, and i think i will also call after i know that she's read it. she is going to blow fire at my name. what should i say in my email? should i call her also? if yes, what should i say when i call her and she is being nasty to me? she can't give me a bad reference over this can she?

    what a bummer situation! please update on what you decided to do. if i were in the situation, i would go to my current employer and explain to them the situation fully. i would tell them that i was willing to stay and help them out if they needed me to, chances are they wont take me up on it. i would make it a point to tell your boss how much you liked your job,the people, and what i difficult decision this was (even if it wasn't), but this job just better suits your needs i think as long as you deal with the situation professionally, you will be fine. employers have to deal with people leaving all of the time, sometimes without any notice. of course they will be upset, nobody likes to have to hire new people and train them, etc. i agree with the other posters, i would not send an email. good luck!!:d
  13. by   raindrop
    Well, I talked with a copuple coworkers and to HR about it. HR told me that I only owe 2 weeks notice and as long as I give 2 weeks, I won't be put on the blacklist, so to speak. HR sees nothing wrong with this.

    I work night shift and I don't see my manager unless she comes in early. I tried calling her but I kept getting her VM. I needed to sleep soon and don't have time to try to catch her , so I went ahead and left a nice email to her. I explained how much I have enjoyed working on this unit for the past year (I actually hate it though) and how I love all of my coworkers and how due to unforseeable circumstances, I have to put my resignation in again. I added that I am willing to work an occasional weekend PRN if that will help.

    I have a lot of friends here and plan on visiting often, so I can do a Friday or Saturday here and there. With my new job, I will have every Friday and weekend off because M-R are 10 hour shifts!

    This was a sticky situation to be put in, but I have truly bent over backwards for this unit and have never really said "no" to her. I have a problem with NO. I don't like that things went down this way, but it was really out of my control. I would have been willing to tell my new job that I need to stay here at least another month, but my landlord won't go month to month with me. He wants a 2 month notice. So if I put in my employment resigantion for one month from now, I would still owe my landlord 1 more months worth of rent. At 1600/month, I can't afford to do that. It would have been perfect if this new job did take 2 months because then I could have given ample notice to my currnet employer and I would have been able to give my landlord is 2 month notice.

    Things happen for a reason said one of my coworkers. Things are getting pretty sticky at work. My manager has her favorite clique and they are all competing for the new assistant manager opening. Lot's of backstabbing happening. I feel liberated. Oh and if any of you remember, this is the same manager who tried to explain to me how to do peritoneal dialysis instead of show me. And when I demanded she come in with me, she said "just ask the patient, he will know. He does it at home". Again, I feel liberated!!!
  14. by   Whispera
    Depending on your relationship with your current boss, I'd agree with the prior post. Most managers understand such situations and aren't monsters!

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