Published Jun 28, 2006
HealthyRN
541 Posts
I have been a nurse for only a few short months, but I am already considering leaving the profession. I just don't think nursing is for me! If I'm completely honest with myself, I knew this while I was in nursing school, but I felt that I had already invested too much time and energy into the program to quit. Because I thought that it would live up to my expectations and goals more than the role of the RN, I applied to an FNP program while in my senior year and I was accepted to a very good program that starts in the fall. I have received a "free-ride" fellowship to attend this university.
My dilemma is that I am no longer certain that I want to become an FNP. I am worried that the realities of the profession will not be what I am looking for in a career, much like I could never have imagined the realities of being an RN. I want to be treated like a professional and I want respect for my education and knowledge. I also want to ENJOY my work. I want to look forward to going to work, at least most of the time. I'm not sure that clinical practice will provide this enjoyment for me.
I will feel guilty for not pursuing the master's degree on so many levels. It seems crazy to turn down the opportunity for a free education. I could always return to school, but I will never have this particular opportunity again. I will be disappointed in myself because obtaining a graduate degree has always been a huge driving force in my life. Also, I will have to continue to work as an RN for at least another year. Beyond this, I have no idea what I want to do with my life. I used to think that I would become a physician, but having had the opportunity to observe what medicine is all about, there is no way that I would even consider it! I am still drawn to the health professions though, and I can't imagine having a job outside of health care.
If anyone has any advice, I would truly appreciate feedback. I am feeling very depressed and frustrated about this situation.
FLAgal14
79 Posts
Hey Kat
I guess a few questions I have that may lead to some advice are:
1) What type of nursing are you doing now (i.e. OR, ob/gyn, etc..)? And is it that there may be another type of nursing that will make you happier?
2) What is the situation in your hospital right now? Do you like your coworkers, place of employment or could there be somewhere else that may be a better fit for you? Where you work can have a large effect on your overall happiness.
3) What else do you think you would like to do other than nursing? If you want more advanced practice care other than nursing have you consider PA school? Have you shadowed or worked with any FNP's to see whether that would meet your goals and would make you happy?
A free ride is a great deal - but I can understand your hesitation if you are unsure if that's the path you want to take. You are still young though so I wouldn't worry about taking time off to think things through more clearly- don't do something that you don't really want. Graduate nursing programs will be always be there- they aren't going anywhere. You have to go with your heart - you said that getting a master's was the driving force in your life - have you thought about why? Was it about just getting a masters or was it about becoming a NP and being able to do what you really want to do? Because just receiving a master's degree is meaningless unless you plan to use it for your ultimate life goals. And believe me - I understand your frustration - it took me about 5 years after graduating from college to come to the conclusion on what path to take in life - I switched my goals and aspirations pretty much every day and I wanted to pull my hair out with the frustration! Since you said you like the health professions maybe you should try to shadow and learn about as many different types of health professionals - it may help you figure things out more. Also - could you defer from the graduate nursing program until next year? That may be an option too....
Good luck Kat!!!
bullcityrn
255 Posts
I'm sorry that things are not working out the way you had hoped. Have you considered shadowing/talking with a FNP to get an idea about the realities of the job?
Don't be too hard on yourself...sometimes it takes actually working in a type of job to realize that it isn't what you thought it would be. I say that you need to evaluate your interests and skills, maybe talk with people in a variety of medical specialties and shadow them if you can to see if you can find the right career for you within the field. I don't know how long you've been nursing, but you may even discover that you want to continue with it once you feel more comfortable within your role. Worst case scenario, you discover that none of it is for you and then move on. Nobody hates to waste time and money, but that's life at times! Making the change when you need to is sure a heck of alot easier than remaining in a job that you hate, take it from me.
Good luck with whatever you decide to do!
llg, PhD, RN
13,469 Posts
I have been a nurse for only a few short months, .
I think the first line of your post says a lot. You've only been a nurse for a few short months. That's not enough time to make the transition from student to professional. You probably need more time before you make such an important life decision.
Will the school allow you to delay your admission? A lot of schools do allow such things if you ask. They may take someone from their waiting list this year and reserve a spot in their class next year. That would be the first thing I would do. See if you can get more time to think it through.
I would also recommend considering whether or not it is just your particular job that you don't care for, or is it "all of nursing." I have seen way to many people leave nursing because they weren't totally happy in their first few months in their first job. Reality shock is very common in every career. Books are written about it and about how contemporary society does not do a good job of preparing young people for the realities of the adult work world.
In any career (not just nursing), it often takes a while to settle into it -- and it often takes 2 or 3 tries before you find the right niche for you. Just because you are not thrilled with your current job situation is no reason to through the whole career away. Give it a little time, figure out whether it is the whole profession you don't like or just this job, and explore all your options before making a decision.
Good luck,
llg
Thanks for all of the replies. I am currently working on a med-surg floor and I am very unhappy. It may be that I am not yet comfortable in my role or it may be that the floor/facility/speciality/nursing is just not for me. I applied to a few other positions recently, so I'll see how it goes. I don't want to give up on nursing yet.
I have shadowed a few NPs in various settings and the job seems like it would be MUCH better than what I am currently doing. But I'm still not sure that it is what I'm looking for. I will take the advice and find other health care professionals to shadow as well. I will let you know how it goes!
Kat