When I decided I wanted to be a nurse it was like a huge weight was lifted off of my shoulders..I finally knew what I wanted to "be when I grew up"!
I love people, I love helping people, and I was so happy and excited etc etc...
I made it through nursing school, and graduated this December. I passed the boards. I was offered jobs for all the positions I interviewed for. Everthing seems peachy, right?
Now, I'm working on an Oncology/MedSurg floor, and my preceptors were great. I had about a 6- 7week orientation, and i've only been on my own for a couple of shifts now. So far the the max pt. load is 5, but i know i will eventually get 6 on a regular basis. So here's my problem...I'm not loving it. I hardly even like it. I can't even pin point why. I work nights, and maybe it's just my sleep schedule taking a toll on my body, but i find myself getting so anxious and crying the day before i have to go in to work. I keep telling myself it's just because I'm new and everybody says it takes 6 months to a year before you feel comfortable, but sometimes I really just want to quit and not deal with it. My husband doesn't know how to deal with all of my crazy emotions and thinks I should go see a shrink.
I guess I just want someone else to say they've gone through something similar. I love working with my patients, and they have all responded very well to me, but I think it's just when I start thinking of all the things that could go wrong, I start freaking out. So, I work tomorrow night, which means I started crying about an hour ago, even though I have all of tomorrow daytime to chill before i go in. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?!?!?!
If you've read this far, thanks, i actually do feel a bit better just getting this off my chest. ANY pearls of wisdom to a new nurse who is feeling very overwhelmed, unsure, intimidated, and very sad at times would be greatly appreciated.
P.S.Thanks to all those who have posted such great advice on these boards before, they helped me through school and the boards and I am so thankful I found allnurses.com!!!