Quote from gooberlilyRN
I was in 4th semester nursing and was on the verge of quitting, but I didn't. I stuck it out and got through it. I made myself work and get that nifty 60 page careplan cranked out and it happened. I got through 2 years of nursing school. I didn't want to quit because we had 2 months until graduation. I told myself to graduate and that if you don't want to continue then don't..(easier said than done in my eyes). I took the boards and failed the first time, I felt like a total failure and cried and was seriously bummed out. But I buckled down and studied my rear off and took them again and passed. I feel like I worked terribly hard to get that license. The stress, tears and sacrifices in nursing school. The stress, tears and weariness to pass those boards. Now the drive to be a nurse is no longer there. I feel like I'm ready to change careers now...what did I do wrong? I currently work in an ER, but I feel like I'm in a rut....help?
Hi! First of all, you sound very much like a person with great determination and strength, and I think that is alot of what it takes to be a nurse! Congradulations on all of your accomplishments! JMHO, but I feel that whenever a person attempts a difficult career path, it becomes overwhelming to the person, and subconsciously the person begins to not want to approach exactly what their striving for. Its hard to explain, but I have felt the same way that you are describing (except I am about to sit for boards, I right behind you), but it seems that every disappointment, or failure, or even discipline will have that subconscious "dreading to do this" effect on me. Yet I will (like you have so bravely done) CONSCIOUSLY face each challange HEAD ON!!!
Try to stay strong and focus on your relationship with your patients, you will have to overcome those "rut" feelings and hone your skills to excel in your career and pretty soon, the rut will be gone, replaced by confidence and understanding, that you are not alone, and nursing NEEDS you! But remember, the disappointments, failures, and other problems will always be there, you will just have to GO WITH THE FLOW! and find hapiness in yourself to replace the negative feelings!!!
BTW, I am dreading taking boards, interviewing for jobs (who ever LIKED a test or an interview!!!???), and I am sure dreading being the NEW NURSE anywhere. BUT-- the feeling that I get from looking someone in the eye and asking them, "Can I help you?" and actually being able to HELP them--well that makes it all worthwhile...Nursing is my ZONE!!!!
Lastly (let me get off my soapbox here), once you try to feel better within, check your surroundings. Make sure you are working in a positive environment. I know that sounds like an oxymoron because an ER is filled with acutely ill people! but, are the working conditions safe? overwhelming? supportive mgmt. (lucky you!)? Take a breather and give it all time to sink in, and good luck to you and all of us just starting out. May God give us the will to have much success! bye 4 now....