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HOW CAN A MOTHER MANAGE KIDS AND NURSING SCHOOL ALL @ ONCE? ANY MILITARY MOMS(WIVES):uhoh3: OR SINGLE MOMS OUT THERE?

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Hi, I am a mother of three, ages 4, 7 , 10. They go to 3 schools in 3 zipcodes. My husband works full time as a VP at a big company. He rarely gets home before 7 and leaves by 7 to go in many days. How do I do it? I am organized, I have good time-management, I take care of what needs to be taken care of before I sit on my booty to relax. I study in the car, on the toilet, at the grocery, at the dr. or dentist, in bed, while cooking. I cook my meals, I pay our bills and keep track of the finances. I drive my kids to activities, to school and help with homework. I don't say this to be an overachiever, but I say it to prove it can be done. I have a good friend who NEVER gets her stuff done. EVER. Her house is a wreck, her finances are a wreck, she is overweight, and she rarely cooks. She is very sweet but she doesn't realize that she gets nothing done because she never does it. Get it. She doesn't ever fold her laundry but wonders why it is always wrinkled and why she can't find it. She doesn't cook because her kitchen is such a wreck that no one could cook if they wanted to. So she buys take out. My motto, if you take it out, put it away, RIGHT THEN. Then, its never messy. In the morning, my feet hit the floor and the bed gets made. Right then. Yes, I get behind, by I work double time to get caught back up. My husband is supportive when he can be. This helps too but lots of time, it is just me figuring it all out.

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cna87, hi! I'm a military spouse stationed at Edwards AFB. Where are you at? I start the nursing program this coming fall and am so worried about the same things you are too!!! I have a soon to be 5th grader and a three year old. I am super nervous about being away from them for the next two years!! The only thing that has gotten me this far has been my support system ( My hubby, friends and family). Thank god for them!!

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Specializes in Psychiatric, Emergency, Public Health.
HOW CAN A MOTHER MANAGE KIDS AND NURSING SCHOOL ALL @ ONCE? ANY MILITARY MOMS(WIVES):uhoh3: OR SINGLE MOMS OUT THERE?

I am not a military mom and I am not a single mom at this juncture either, but I do work full tima, raise 3 children ages 10, 7, and 4, and go to school full time. I am no longer single, but I was a single mom to these children for a time. My answer to you is...... A mother manages as best she can.

It wasnt that long ago that I was posting to allnurses in a panic because school/family complications had required me to drop out of my nursing program. It was a horrid time for me. I felt I had to choose between my family and my future. I've been very blessed since then and everything is back on track, but I learned a lot along my way.

1. As a single mom, a good child care provider is your best friend. Do not feel guilty for having a child in daycare or after school programs. Most children enjoy the opportunity to interact with other children their age, and lets face it Mom's in nursing school have no time for setting up play dates. Nor are mommy's any fun when cramming for exams. And I am sorry, but the old "I don't want other people raising my children" addage does not fly. I never met a child who could not differentiate mommy from another caregiver. By selecting the best caregiver you can you are indeed making a parenting decision. Parenting does not stop jsut because they are not at home.

2. As a single mom you probably have a reduced income. This sounds horrible but may work to your advantage. There are many programs out there to help single mothers. You may qualify for a suppliment to help pay for the afore mentioned child care. Many schools have organizations for single mothers and/or free child care services through the school itself. Your reduced income may also help you to qualify for more grants as well. Always take advantage of a grant since this does not add the debt of school loans.

3. Do set aside special "no school time" with your children. I know its hard for us nursing students to put down our books, but do it. Your children are the priority, not school, and they sometimes need reminders of that.

4. Try not to wallow in your single situation when it comes to school. I love my new husband to death, but I had an easier time of nursing school before I remarried. Sometimes a spouse can complicate the nursing school experience because not only do you have to take care of the needs of your children, but the needs of your spouse as well. Spouse's are funny little creatures... THEY WILL FEEL NEGLECTED while you are in nursing school.

5. Keep a calendar. Keep it updated with everything and check it frequently. Not just your school assignments, but your children's school calendar and activities. If you have a school/childcare conflict you'll want ample time to find a back up sitter or to rearrange your clinical schedule if allowed to do so. Nothing worse than having your kids on spring break during finals week and not having a sitter arranged for. At one point I actually had all my days mapped out in 15 minute increments to make sure I didnt miss any assignments, clinicals, classes, parent teacher conferences, or SLEEP

6. Do not short change yourself on sleep. I recently had a professor state that if you get 4 hours of sleep a night while in nursing school you should feel lucky. I call Bullcrap. If you dont get enough sleep, you wont retain the information you study. If you dont get enough sleep your more likely to slip up at clinicals, or maybe even sleep through your alarm and miss clinicals. If you dont get enough sleep you will be more emotional, more cranky with your kids, less able to cope... Period. Get enough sleep. Your kids deserve a happy mommy when you actually have time to be home with them.

7. DOnt be ashamed to ask for help. As a nurse you'll be helping people constantly. You wont feel burdened. If your lucky enough to have family nearby, ask for help when you need it. They know your trying to improve your life and your children's life. They know its temporary.

8. When all else fails..... go to Mcdonald's.... seriously. Take the kidlets to dinner somewhere with a playland. They'll feel like they are getting special mommy time, but you can get some extra study time in while they are playing their little hearts out!

So yeah... Hope atleast some of that helps.

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Hi. I am not a single mom. However, I have to kids under the age of five and a husband who works ALL the time. Basically, I am a single mom, sometimes, Ha! I think that your first poster said it all. I will tell you this. When it comes time to study, think about going to bed early, say, when your kids do, then wake up very, very early in the morning to study. I always say I am going to study when I get the kids to bed but by then, I am worn out and studying is moot. I am so much more fresh in the morning time. Plan meals ahead. You can go online and make out a meal plan for your family for the whole month. It will then print out your grocery list. Just google meal planning or something along those lines. With this, you can have the things you need before hand and sometimes even prepared. Take time out on a Sat or Sun to prepare meals to freeze. MAKE SURE YOU HAVE A CROCK POT! I have two just to prepare freezer meals. I also have a Pressure Cooker to can soups and stews ahead of time.

Just remember, it won't be forever. Hang in there and keep organized.

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Specializes in PICU/Pedi.
HOW CAN A MOTHER MANAGE KIDS AND NURSING SCHOOL ALL @ ONCE? ANY MILITARY MOMS(WIVES):uhoh3: OR SINGLE MOMS OUT THERE?

It's all about time management and organization, baby! :D

On Sunday night, get all your kids' clothes together for the week and all socks, shoes, accessories, etc. This semester I am going to try ironing and hanging the clothes to keep them from wrinkling, and am going to get one of those 5-shelf closet organizers to hang and put shoes, socks, etc. on each shelf for each day of the week. I never manage to get my own clothes together a week ahead of time, but maybe I will try that. :rolleyes:

Use a planner and check it OFTEN to see what is coming up that needs to be done. I highlight really important stuff in a bold color so that it catches my attention. Put dates for all bills due, all appointments, assignments, social engagements (not much of those!), etc. I actually mark my bills due a week before they are so that I get the check sent in plenty of time.

Don't go to bed without having your backpack, purse, clinical bag, lunch bag, etc. all in one place and waiting for you, ready to go, in the morning. If it's possible to make your lunch the night before, then do that (not sandwiches!).

I agree with the pp who said to use being a single mom to your adavantage. There are programs to help pay for school and supplies, day care, gas, books, rent, etc. Being a single mom on welfare sucks, but it's not forever!

Yes, and McDonald's playland is great, too. I took my kids last semester so I could study for finals and they played for at least two hours. Give them bath crayons while they are in the tub, and sit next to it with your flashcards and study while they color. Let them watch movies. But do spend some time with them without your books. On weekends when my ex has the kids, I get LOTS of stuff done, and try to get ahead, if I can.

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well i was in nursing school and i wasnt like u lol--i was the total opposite becasue @ the time i was a single mom (just last year)plus i was suffering from depression to it made it extra hard.coming home with bad burning headaches.

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kgordnt--im stationed in san diego now my hubby going somewhere else--he out of the marines--but far as that he supportive of me but sometimes being a military wive its still like a single mom

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nepenthe-sea lol see i didnt do all that i wuld try and do all that in the morning--i tell u back then i wasnt thinking clear at all im only 22.so the club was on my mind and my hubby was in Iraq--plus family wasnt all that helpful --next duty il try better--and try allllllllllllllllllllll of yall advice

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I was a military wife. My soon to be ex husband just left my two boys I for a younger women. He is stationed in San Diego now and my boys and I are in PA. Im doing my pre-reqs. for Nursing school.

Like you Im very nervous about balancing everything, but I believe if you want something bad enough you will achieve it. I don't have any family in the area so I have to rely soley on child care providers. I also have to find a way to supplement the income I was getting from him.

I know what its like to be a military wife, very hard. You can do it though, especially if you have his support. Feel blessed that he is at least there for you on that end.

My motto that I go by is everything happens for a reason. You can make it, just like I know I will.

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yea i know its hard because ou follow them around like a sad puppy and its hard to make a life for yourself.that why i want t hurry up--men come and go--education is for life

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As another poster put it....it is all about organization!

I was a single mom of 5 while doing pre-reqs. I married my military guy Sep 6th. I now have 9 kids! LOL (4 step-children). I work FT. I live in Jacksonville, but hubby is in SCANG-AGR. He is deploying in Nov to Afganistan....which is my 2nd term in my ADN program.

(BTW, I am a vet myself...dad is retired AF...DD in reserves after 4 yrs in the Army as a medic with 2 trips to the sandbox!)

When the goal is your main focus, you can make it happen. I still work FT, go to school Nights and weekends with hubby home only 3 weekends out of 4....of course, I have clinicals on Saturdays, so our time is limited.

You can do this!

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