Family members that follow you

xtxrn, ASN, RN · Aug 13, 2011

Nurses I really need advice on this one! During my 7a-7p shift I had a family member that would not use the call light! Everytime I looked up he was standing infront of me with the " I just have a quick question" So after about 4hours of this I decided to chart in a room. Who finds me........ he does! I even educated him thinking maybe he really doesn't know how to use the call light! At the end of my shift I thought to myself, other nurses experience this as well( I hope lol) I hate when family members feel the need to follow you instead of using the call light or just flat out ask a million questions!

I'd be a bit bummed about someone following me- BUT, a big part of your job is answering questions- and that includes family (being sure not to violate HIPAA). :)

Is there any pattern to the questions? Any topic he keeps coming back to? It's hard to find balance with some families- one thing to look at is that he won't be there forever :) I'm not sure what to do- I've found myself having to just deal with the questions, and do the charting when I can. There's something he's not "getting", or could be really scared about the health situation of his family member, flirting?, or who knows what- patients come with a host of problems, and sometimes those include family members that drive us nuts...usually they're doing the best they know how to do in a situation they're not familiar/comfortable with.... :)

tokmom, BSN, RN · Aug 13, 2011

That is what the bathroom and breakroom are for. :lol2:

Sugarcoma, RN · Aug 13, 2011

I have had pt.'s family members follow me as well. You have to educate them. Some things I have used that have been successful are telling them you may not EVER walk into another patient's room.(seriously if they continue to do this call security!) That I am doing my med pass and cannot speak with them until I am through. Here is a piece of paper, please write your questions down when you think of them and when I come in again we can discuss them etc. Instruct them to use the light (again) and make sure they know that the tech or aide can handle requests such as water, blankets, toileting etc. Explain to them in a nice way that you have X amount of patients today and must divide your attention and that you understand they are worried but cannot monopolize your time. If these tactics do not work then it is time to get your manager involved.

llg, PhD, RN · Aug 13, 2011

I would give him a paper & pen and ask him to write his questions down. Then tell him that you will be back in a specific amount of time and he can ask you all of his questions then. (e.g. "I have to take care of some of my other patients right now ... but I'll be back in about half an hour to check up on you. You can ask me all of your questions then.")

Jenni811, RN · Aug 13, 2011

i had a family where the patients son had a notebook. he took down EVERY note in that stupid little notebook. I mean everything!! Doc and i were in the room and the doc was listening to lung sounds, the son was like "what do you hear?" and the doctor was like "Ronchi" (attempting to throw him off) he looked at me "how do spell that?"

I mean EVERY FREAKING detail was written in this notebook. Every medication i gave he asked me every question you could possibly think of. "If you don't know the answer, is it really safe to be administering this medication?"

I just wanted to rip that darn notebook out of his hand and destroy it!! ugh.

tokmom, BSN, RN · Aug 13, 2011

i had a family where the patients son had a notebook. he took down EVERY note in that stupid little notebook. I mean everything!! Doc and i were in the room and the doc was listening to lung sounds, the son was like "what do you hear?" and the doctor was like "Ronchi" (attempting to throw him off) he looked at me "how do spell that?"
I mean EVERY FREAKING detail was written in this notebook. Every medication i gave he asked me every question you could possibly think of. "If you don't know the answer, is it really safe to be administering this medication?"
I just wanted to rip that darn notebook out of his hand and destroy it!! ugh.

Good Lord! He deserved the Pain In The A** award! :eek:

Sugarcoma, RN · Aug 13, 2011

ugh Jenni, been there done that! It is so nerve-wracking!

prettyinblu · Aug 13, 2011

No! None of his questions made any sense and I am so sure by the 20th question he couldve guessed that I was getting a bit agitated! He would say O did you know the MD said xyz and I would reply no because I havent been able to check for orders. Then what got me was around 3ish he says so how was dad's night last night? At that moment I gave up

dthfytr, ADN, LPN, RN, EMT-B, EMT-I · Aug 13, 2011

Just another reason why I admire nurses who can work the floors. I'd go postal if I had to put up with family following me around.

Sugarcoma, RN · Aug 13, 2011

It has been my observation that the amount of time a family member spends pestering the nurse is inversely related to the functionality of the relationship between said family member and patient.

Medic/Nurse, BSN, RN · Aug 13, 2011

I had a patient's mother (patient was in his early 30's and had no deficit that made parents necessary - mom had been a CNA and thought she'd help "him" with the ED visit - acute on chronic low back pain - no new injury, but 5+ year history of LBP post some type of lifting "injury" at work at well known fast food establishment) actually follow me from the med pyxis to ANOTHER patient's room - she then proceeded to grab me by the back of the shoulders and turn me around (I am solidly built - a former firefighter and I work out) to tell me -

"The doctor said you'd be right in with my son's pain medicine and it has been 10 minutes." :eek: :eek:

(I asked her to remove her hands from me, never touch me again and I told her to get back into "her" room right then or security would escort her to the parking lot. I was not in any mood to be abused or toyed with by family act out nonsense. I finally made it to the room of my LBP med "emergency" medicated the patient and candidly outlined EXPECTATIONS of PROPER BEHAVIOR)

The room she followed me into was that of an 8 year old boy who had been moved to one of "MY CRASH ROOMS" after being in the ED under the care of another nurse for 8+ hours for asthma exacerbation that ended in my room being tubed and placed on vent. The original nurse went to the charge and pointed out that nurse "ME" had to an empty "crash room" and it would be better to move her pedi patient to me because I had an empty room (1 of 6) and since nurse "ME" DID NOT have KIDS - I would be able to more easily take care of it.

Some days.

Being followed by patient/family over trivial and non-urgent matters is never a good idea for anyone. It annoys me, violates other patients and ultimately most likely negatively impacts care for all. I think a short talk outlining clear expectations of behavior and subsequent actions to follow if behavior becomes a "problem" is always a good idea.

You were more patient that I would have been.

Good Luck

:angel: