Funny patient names by nurses

Specialties Emergency

Published

This could be fun what are some of the funniest names you have heard out at triage?

I had a teenage mom that came in I asked what the newborns name was, she smiled and state "Sparkles". I kept a straight face and thought to myself what a loving mother to give her daughter a stripper name.

I have of Shithead Pronounced shathead, Asshole prounounced assouly

Lovie Butt

what are some good ones you have heard

Specializes in LTC, MSP, ICU.

I wemt to school with a girl who was named after the way her mom signed letters to her dad "loving you always" was translated in Luvinia Always as the girls name. Kinda wierd and sweet at the same time

Specializes in Peds, ER/Trauma.

I always get a kick out of patients named "Melena" (have seen this several times). If only these parents knew that they've named their daughters after bloody stool.......

Specializes in tele, icu, homecare, long-term acute.

I had a pt the other night named Wyticha.....still trying to figure out how to pronounce it as I never got the chance to ask her how :lol2:

Specializes in ER, ICU, Prehospital.

My last name (Bigham) was enough to make jokes about but add my first name (Avery) in and it multiplied the teasing. A-very-Big-ham Easy for most people to remember though :)

Had a foreign patient named Ho Bich once...

I had a teacher named whoredyke poor lady. Sorry not a pt, but I'm not a nurse yet so I gotta use teachers!

Specializes in Tele, ED/Pediatrics, CCU/MICU.

My dentist's name is Dr. Fang!!!

Specializes in ER!.

We had a patient who was bad off enough that we needed to contact her PCP. She said she saw an NP named Harriet Johnson. We looked, could not find any such person, so I went back and clarified with the pt, who said, "No, it's Harry."

So our very sweet, young, fairly new unit secretary got on the phone and called the clinic, and when they picked up, she said, "Hi, I'm calling to see if you have a Harry Johnson?"

Well naturally we just fell on the floor laughing ourselves sick until we couldn't even breathe, and she was oblivious. I told her I was amazed they had not assumed she was a crank and hung up on her.

Specializes in EMS, ER, GI, PCU/Telemetry.

some of my favorite patient names...

-babyboy and babygirl

-bonequita

-chiquita banana

-chickenbone robinson

-female (pronounced fe-mal-lay)

-precious angel

-shithead (pronounced shith-heed)

-hymen

-angel baby

-honey child

-queen

-princess

-hiney

-jolly

-harold peter

-richard dick

-anita hoare

-ima wonderlick (i almost peed myself with this one)

We have a patient named Priti --- pronounced Pretty

Specializes in Emergency.

I had a Cinderella and a Princess both on the same day (not related, did not come in together; complete strangers). What an enchanted evening.

Specializes in ER.

Saw some one named Spyder, and Hunter Butt (no kidding). Also work with Dr Aswad.

Specializes in NICU.

I knew a girl in high school named Ivana Fok. Poor thing.

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