My article is about how much I want to be an RN. However, now because I am married with a little one, I don't know if I can go to nursing school. My husband is the only one working but his job in the oil field has cut back hours & we don't have the funds or family support for me to go back to school. I also touch on how it has been living & working with epilepsy.
I can't pin point what exactly drew me to nursing. I never had a moment where I said "This is it!". It was more my parents telling me nursing is a good, stable career. So I went along with what they said. I first went to school at a 4 year university, I didn't do well there & eventually moved to a different city.
Before I moved I wasn't sure if nursing was for me. So I looked up different majors at the 4 year university & community college in that town. Eventually I settled on going to the community college & becoming an LVN. I took the TEAS test, got into the program in 2008 & a year later in 2009 I was an LVN.
After the program I went straight to finish my pre-reqs, I wanted to be the first in my class to get my RN. I was so determined to become an RN. But then after I passed my NCLEX in 2010 I started working & just put off nursing school. I figured I would go to school in a year or two, that school would always be there. I was single, what would happen?
Well when I started applying in 2012 it wasn't as easy as I thought to get in. I applied but didn't get in on my first round of applications. I was upset but I was determined. So I kept applying.
Then I met my husband & in 2014 I got pregnant. It was very unexpected but exciting. Of course in the last trimester & last month of my pregnancy I was admitted to a great nursing program. I accepted it but then had to turn it down. I didn't want to but my health wasn't great during my pregnancy & was put on bed rest in the end of my pregnancy. Now my son is 1 year old & I see all these posts about people taking pre-reqs or getting accepted into nursing school. I wish I could do it. But because of my situation I have realized that becoming an RN will only be a dream.
My husband works in the oil field, his hours have been cut drastically & he is gone for 2 weeks & home for 1 week. I have no back up babysitter for my son. Any other family lives an hour away & they all work. We live with my mom but she works & is insanely busy even when she doesn't work. We can't afford a baby sitter or daycare. He went from making $3-4,000 to $1,000 a month. My husband loves what he does, he doesn't do it to be away from us. He misses us every day. He works in very dangerous conditions; in the heat, rain, hail. You name it he is working in it.
I think it also hurts because I have two ex-friends who I don't believe deserve to be RNs, now RNs. It hurts when people you know don't deserve something get something you want so bad. Plus three out of four of my sciences are already expired. I don't have the motivation to retake them. I just want to be in nursing school or have my RN.
I have to add, I was diagnosed with epilepsy as a freshman in high school. I had always tried to fit in and be "normal" despite that. I can't count how many times I ended up in the ER because I drank myself to a seizure when I was in college. Well fast forward to me working as an LVN. I'm working at a county jail PRN, every shift, any shift; 8 hour & 12 hour shifts. This particular night I was working 12 hour shifts & I was suppose to stay over 4 hours in the morning. I feel something is just "off". As an epileptic when you feel something is off, you know something is going to happen. You don't know when or where, but it will happen. So I called my boss & told him I wouldn't be able to work the extra 4 hours in the morning. He begged me, he pleaded with me. I told him I would see how I felt. Well a few hours later I was with my coworker in the nurses station after we passed our meds, the next thing I knew I woke up in the back of an ambulance. So it makes things really difficult looking for jobs knowing I can't apply for certain jobs because I can't work at night.
I want to support my family but I also don't want to leave my son. I want to watch him grow up. It's a very tough decision. Especially when my husband is home only one week a month. It's hard decision to make, going back to school or work. I love my family. I'm not embarrassed living with my mother, I love her & she helps out immensely. I don't know what I would do without her. I do have a great support system but just not the kind I can go to school with right now. I hope one day I can go back to school when my son is older, possibly in school. If not, then maybe I can go back to work. Whatever happens I want to put my family first.
My goodness, you are too young to say that something will never happen. Enjoy your child while he is a baby. Pretty soon he will be in school. Things will change because they always do.
If you don't like comments you receive, then don't post your personal business on a public message board.
My take (which you won't want) is that even though your mother doesn't need the money, it might be nice for you to give her something each month, just to show your appreciation for what she is doing for you.
I'm sure there will be yet another reason why you don't need to do this.
Come to think of it, I think this was the thread I said I wouldn't post on anymore, LOL.
This. I don't think it's rude. I think it's constructive advice.
No one wants loans. No one wants debt. Most of us want to work less when our babies are young.
OrganizedChaos, You have a nice set up now, you are young, you have plenty of time, so it all should work out.
But it won't be PERFECT. What if, God forbid, something happens to your MIL babysitter plans down the road, like health issues?
This is what we mean when we say life gets in the way. I will be willing to bet we all had/have obstacles.
There is never going to be a good time to go back to school. There is always going to be a really good reason to wait a couple more years.
In two years, your mother-in-law might have financial troubles and not be able to retire. She might get sick and not be able to watch your son. You might have another baby and feel like you shouldn't go back to school with a newborn, or that you can't afford it. Not to mention, you said you feel like your epilepsy is getting worse the older you get...you also don't know what your health status will be in two years.
If you really want to be an RN, the best way to make that happen is to start taking steps towards that goal right now. Depending on a commitment someone else made two years in the future is very risky. Make plans assuming that you can't depend on anyone but yourself, and if someone ends up being able to help then that's great...but if they can't, then you'll still be able to move forward.
Specializes in M/S, LTC, Corrections, PDN & drug rehab.
There is never going to be a good time to go back to school. There is always going to be a really good reason to wait a couple more years.
In two years, your mother-in-law might have financial troubles and not be able to retire. She might get sick and not be able to watch your son. You might have another baby and feel like you shouldn't go back to school with a newborn, or that you can't afford it. Not to mention, you said you feel like your epilepsy is getting worse the older you get...you also don't know what your health status will be in two years.
If you really want to be an RN, the best way to make that happen is to start taking steps towards that goal right now. Depending on a commitment someone else made two years in the future is very risky. Make plans assuming that you can't depend on anyone but yourself, and if someone ends up being able to help then that's great...but if they can't, then you'll still be able to move forward.
Well I'm going on birth control so I won't have another baby until I at least graduate from nursing school. My MIL watches my son on the weekends my husband is at work & there have never been any issues. She wants to watch him when I go to school & I'm not gonna tell her no. I feel like now you are just making up a whole bunch of ridiculous circumstances. She has been working for 40 years, I'm pretty sure she doesn't spend every check that comes in & she has retirement from jobs she has retired from. If I have a good set up in two years, good for me! I know for a fact she wants to be done.
Of course I will have a back up plan in case she gets sick or needs to go somewhere. But for right now I can't go to school because we can't afford daycare/school/etc & I have no one to watch my son since we can't afford daycare. If I can do all this in two years, then it makes me happy to know that in a few short years I can. As far as my epilepsy goes, I already said (how many times do I have to repeat myself?) I was going to see my neurologist at the end of the month.
Well I'm going on birth control so I won't have another baby until I at least graduate from nursing school. My MIL watches my son on the weekends my husband is at work & there have never been any issues. She wants to watch him when I go to school & I'm not gonna tell her no. I feel like now you are just making up a whole bunch of ridiculous circumstances. She has been working for 40 years, I'm pretty sure she doesn't spend every check that comes in & she has retirement from jobs she has retired from. If I have a good set up in two years, good for me! I know for a fact she wants to be done.
Of course I will have a back up plan in case she gets sick or needs to go somewhere. But for right now I can't go to school because we can't afford daycare/school/etc & I have no one to watch my son since we can't afford daycare. If I can do all this in two years, then it makes me happy to know that in a few short years I can. As far as my epilepsy goes, I already said (how many times do I have to repeat myself?) I was going to see my neurologist at the end of the month.
The possibility of financial hardship and/or illness is far from a ridiculous circumstance, and the fact that you're going to a neurologist in a month hardly predicts what's going to happen in two years.
My apologies for offering my perspective. I'm sure you really can see into the future, it was rude of me to imply otherwise.
Specializes in M/S, LTC, Corrections, PDN & drug rehab.
The possibility of financial hardship and/or illness is far from a ridiculous circumstance, and the fact that you're going to a neurologist in a month hardly predicts what's going to happen in two years.
My apologies for offering my perspective. I'm sure you really can see into the future, it was rude of me to imply otherwise.
Well considering I know my MIL/FIL financial situation, yes...I can see into the future. The fact that I am setting up my future to go back to school then people are knocking me down is hurtful. I'm trying to go back & my family is helping me. Well I'm going to my neurologist to better my future & prevent any ill outcomes in the future. I will continue to see my neurologist as he sees fit. Once again, I am doing all of this to try to go back to school!
Specializes in Oncology; medical specialty website.
Well I'm going on birth control so I won't have another baby until I at least graduate from nursing school. My MIL watches my son on the weekends my husband is at work & there have never been any issues. She wants to watch him when I go to school & I'm not gonna tell her no. I feel like now you are just making up a whole bunch of ridiculous circumstances. She has been working for 40 years, I'm pretty sure she doesn't spend every check that comes in & she has retirement from jobs she has retired from. If I have a good set up in two years, good for me! I know for a fact she wants to be done.
Of course I will have a back up plan in case she gets sick or needs to go somewhere. But for right now I can't go to school because we can't afford daycare/school/etc & I have no one to watch my son since we can't afford daycare. If I can do all this in two years, then it makes me happy to know that in a few short years I can. As far as my epilepsy goes, I already said (how many times do I have to repeat myself?) I was going to see my neurologist at the end of the month.
They aren't ridiculous. I had all kinds of plans a few years ago, then BLAMMO...I got diagnosed with cancer. Those plans I had changed fast.
My parents had plans a few years ago, but when I got sick, I had to move back in with them. I can't drive anymore, so they have to chauffeur me to multiple doctors visits, PT, etc.
I was planning on finishing my BSN, but in the middle of the course I was taking, I had a recurrence of my cancer. No more BSN.
You never know from one day to the next how your circumstances will change. I think people are trying to explain to you how the best laid plans can fall apart, but you don't seem receptive to listening to people who have BTDT. At this point, it seems like you're dug in.
So this time I'm going to remember that this is the thread I'm bowing out of. I blame forgetting the last time on chemo brain, LOL.
The possibility of financial hardship and/or illness is far from a ridiculous circumstance, and the fact that you're going to a neurologist in a month hardly predicts what's going to happen in two years.
My apologies for offering my perspective. I'm sure you really can see into the future, it was rude of me to imply otherwise.
Yep.
I know you are HOPING for the best. I hope for the best for you, I truly do.
One of my best friends (age 25) is going through the same dilemma and betting on things to work out. But life has a way of piling on the **** when you least expect it. I'm not being negative, it is realistic. The older you get, the harder it is to bounce back.
Specializes in Oncology; medical specialty website.
Yep.
I know you are HOPING for the best. I hope for the best for you, I truly do.
One of my best friends (age 25) is going through the same dilemma and betting on things to work out. But life has a way of piling on the **** when you least expect it. I'm not being negative, it is realistic. The older you get, the harder it is to bounce back.
Specializes in M/S, LTC, Corrections, PDN & drug rehab.
They aren't ridiculous. I had all kinds of plans a few years ago, then BLAMMO...I got diagnosed with cancer. Those plans I had changed fast.
My parents had plans a few years ago, but when I got sick, I had to move back in with them. I can't drive anymore, so they have to chauffeur me to multiple doctors visits, PT, etc.
I was planning on finishing my BSN, but in the middle of the course I was taking, I had a recurrence of my cancer. No more BSN.
You never know from one day to the next how your circumstances will change. I think people are trying to explain to you how the best laid plans can fall apart, but you don't seem receptive to listening to people who have BTDT. At this point, it seems like you're dug in.
So this time I'm going to remember that this is the thread I'm bowing out of. I blame forgetting the last time on chemo brain, LOL.
Yes, I am digging in because I know I want to go back to school & my husband & his family want to help. I am doing what I can to make sure my health doesn't get in the way this time. My husband & his family are really great & want to see me succeed & if it can happen in two years then I will wait because I know it can't happen now. I'm sorry you were diagnosed with cancer. I know life can get in the way, but I am making sure nothing gets in the way this time, especially if I have so much family support. If something happens at that time, I'll take it from there. But right now I'm making plans to go back to school in two years, which makes me happy.
Specializes in M/S, LTC, Corrections, PDN & drug rehab.
Yep.
I know you are HOPING for the best. I hope for the best for you, I truly do.
One of my best friends (age 25) is going through the same dilemma and betting on things to work out. But life has a way of piling on the **** when you least expect it. I'm not being negative, it is realistic. The older you get, the harder it is to bounce back.
I have a better feeling about things working out then. My son will be older & my MIL will be retired. Of course I will have back up plans. I will make sure nothing gets in my way (health wise) but can't help if something happens with other people. But for now, it looks great for me to go back to school in 2 years. My MIL is excited to take him when I'm in school & really wants me to go back.
MrsK62
17 Posts
My goodness, you are too young to say that something will never happen. Enjoy your child while he is a baby. Pretty soon he will be in school. Things will change because they always do.