Jump to content

Dear Nurses: Please Forgive Me

Nurses Article   (26,502 Views 63 Replies 869 Words)

CheesePotato is a BSN, RN and specializes in Sleep medicine,Floor nursing, OR, Trauma.

1 Follower; 22 Articles; 35,874 Profile Views; 228 Posts

A letter of reflection, a plea for forgiveness, a note of encouragement for ED, ICU, and Floor Nurses, who work so hard with sometimes so little, understand where the "family members from hell" are coming from. A gentle nudge to remind that the person lying in that bed belongs to the heart of those around them. Ultimately, this is a note of deep, deep gratitude. I could never do what you do and I am so very thankful that you chose your current role. You are unique, powerful, and so important. Kindly remember. At the end of the day--remember. You are reading page 5 of Dear Nurses: Please Forgive Me. If you want to start from the beginning Go to First Page.

2 Articles; 11,114 Posts; 14,544 Profile Views

I gotta stop reading you, CP. Your words are so ... transformative ... I can hardly stand it.

 

Never stop writing. I will never stop reading.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

nkochrn has 10 years experience and specializes in ER, OB, Med-Surg, Geriatric, Clinic.

5 Articles; 257 Posts; 12,492 Profile Views

Great article! It is soooo much different to be the family, I watched as my Dad sat waiting and waiting and waiting to have SOMETHING done when his HGB had dropped to 4 and he had the most awful skin color I've ever seen on a LIVING person. In all fairness they were working on getting him a blood transfusion but it felt like nothing was happening, he needed to be transferred to a different facility and it was taking forever. I wanted to scream and tell someone to get him outta here and on his way to where he needs to be. I knew they were doing all they could and we had to wait for the other hospital to accept.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Keila has 1 years experience and specializes in LTC, Ortho/Med-Surg.

36 Posts; 1,699 Profile Views

Thank you for your kind words, CheesePotato. Please know that my heart is with you and your family.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

GitanoRN has 48 years experience as a BSN, MSN, RN and specializes in Trauma, ER, ICU, CCU, PACU, GI, Cardiology, OR.

2,114 Posts; 24,840 Profile Views

Enlightening as well as heart felt, thank you for sharing this post with all of us... Aloha~

desismileys_6636.gif

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

mrsshifflette09 has 3 years experience and specializes in Neurosciences, Med-Surg-CNA.

86 Posts; 2,662 Profile Views

What a beautifully written post. I work in neuro and I have seen this time and time again. It is a terrible thing to see someone go like that. Bless you for being so supportive of your father. I know it means the world to him.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

83 Posts; 2,885 Profile Views

I'm going to print this off and bring it to my nursing classmates, and to the care home I work at and post it on the staff board on every floor. This needs to be required reading. Thank you so, so much for these words, and I am so sorry for your pain. I have no words to offer but loving thoughts sent your way.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

7 Posts; 1,655 Profile Views

This took my breath away. Absolutely beautiful.

I'm so sorry for all you are going through. :cry:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

clumsy penguin has 1 years experience.

16 Posts; 1,546 Profile Views

I am sorry for the pain you are going through... This is so sad, I had tears while reading your post. :cry: The sadness can be felt through your writing. I still have my father however I am absolutely terrified of the day he is taken from us. I hope you can find some comfort during this time and I am so sorry. Thank you for sharing and I will pray for you

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

2 Posts; 605 Profile Views

CP, thank you for sharing such a vulnernable moment in life. My mother died almost 8yrs ago and I feel every moment you are speaking of. 6 weeks in the hospital and feeling so lost...I always say that it is not that it gets better, but different. The morning she died, as I did the neuro checks as she slipped further away and felt so helpless, knowing what was happening and could do nothing to stop it, she did not want it. I am not very good with written words; Esme what you have said is what I know as well. Thank you as well. Stay strong CP, but know that it is okay to reach out, to lean on someone, even if it is only briefly...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

1 Post; 569 Profile Views

This really hit home with me. When my husband was in ICU and we didnt know if he would pull thru (he did that time) I was probably just like this lady was. He eventually passed away a few month later and I sent the nurses in ICU a thank you gift for the care they gave him. It is so true that nurses can be H--- on wheels when its their family. This brought back so many memories when I read it.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

CheesePotato is a BSN, RN and specializes in Sleep medicine,Floor nursing, OR, Trauma.

1 Follower; 22 Articles; 228 Posts; 35,874 Profile Views

Again, thank you for all your kind thoughts and words. I am touched at the reply and I welcome those who wish to share this article to do so.

As I have said previously, once my words are released to the universe they are no longer mine--do with them as you will.

Kindest regards,

~~CP~~

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

1 Post; 802 Profile Views

Thank you for your transparency. My dad died just over a week ago. I didn't think for a moment when inquiring about his labs, ejection fraction, or prognosis that I was asking too much. It seemed as though no one wanted to follow up by returning with the requested information. Specialists came and went - none of which wanted to answer any questions outside of their specialty ("I'm the kidney and liver specialist"). There were mixed signals - on his last day they were requesting to insert a PICC for long-term antibiotic therapy which I interpreted to mean that they felt he had progressed enough to warrant long-term intervention. He died just a few hours later. No amount of inquiry, due diligence, or nursing knowledge helped to understand his dire condition. I became his little girl and in the final hour of his life, I pleaded with the nurse to please help me decide what to do because I couldn't "think like a nurse anymore."

Please, if you feel challenged by an inquiring member of the patient's family, understand we're just looking for information so we can know clearly what we're dealing with. It's not to lay blame - it's our area of expertise and we need to process things. Our other family members are also relying upon us to interpret and advocate for our loved ones. Take some extra time to peruse the chart and provide answers - we're in this together. It's likely we will all be in this type of situation at one or more times in our lives. "Difficult" family members are usually the ones you would want advocating for you if you were a patient. I've always admired those who came to intervene for our patients - it keeps us accountable and working at our best.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
×