daughter stressing in clinicals

[joannep]

Hi Everyone,

My daughter is half way through her second year of BNS and is currently doing clinicals. She is stressed out, and having panic attacks and has been sent home by her educator on two occasions. This of course has convinced her that she really is a failure! At the moment she has been sent home from clinicals, I contacted her uni and she has spoken to her lecturer, apparently this educator has a reputation for being "tough". But, we all know, the real world is full of educators/supervisors etc who have high expectations and who expect you to meet them or exceed them. So, in an education system where mediocrity is seen as excelling are we making our kids unable to deal with this reality?

I am sorry she is experiencing this, but I know that she has not done any prereading before going on these clinicals and that she has not applied herself to her studies enough since she began her course. She has been bright enough to get by, now I believe "Her chickens have come home to roost".

But am I being too hard on her? I am also an RN and I remember my training, and I was often in tears while I was learning, but I never quit. Hell, my mother (also an RN!) would have sent me straight back. I worry that she has gone into nursing because she thinks that this is my expectation, because she would follow myself, my mother and my grandmother as a nurse. But it has never been my expectation, I encouraged her to look at alternate careers before she decided on nursing. But you never know what really motivates your children. Your children are full of surprises.

[leslie :-D]

i am confident your daughter's panic attacks will diminish, if and when she decides to prepare for her clinicals.

it's imperative to know/understand your pt's dx, pmh, meds, labs, functional status, etc.

once she acquires this knowledge, she will be in more control of her situation.

i hope she chooses to apply herself.

best of everything.

leslie

[jmking]

I remember having a very difficult teacher my first two clinicals. I got sent home. All you can do is support her and tell her to be better prepared. Some instructors are there to make you life a living hell.

JEnnifer

[LVNwannaBE2007]

there was always a little running joke at our school that a pre-admission requirement for nursing school should be xanax, ativan etc. by the end of our program more than 75% of my class was on anti-anxiety meds (out class today was 64) ...

nursing school is hard..... i was having 9-10 panic attacks a day before i got on my meds... i wasnt even functioning during the day

[nyapa, RN]

Has your daughter sought counselling? It may help her determine what she really wants, whether it be in the nursing field or no. It may also help her developing coping strategies and problem solving in the area she chooses, as well as life in general.

I can talk - like some of the others here I too am on an antidepressant, but counselling has really helped. I actually left the RN course to do my EN (LPN). Working in the field, I then made the decision I did want to go on. Walking back into that building nearly freaked me out - but I got through. Of course that was me, and everyone is different.

Whatever your daughter decides, I hope she goes well, and finds strategies to cope. Panic attacks are not funny; I wouldn't wish them on my worst enemy...

[pagandeva2000, LPN]

I had rough lecturers for nursing school as well. I didn't have panic attacks per se (I had those during pre-req days), but walked around REALLY angry until graduation. I don't think you are being hard on her; you are trying to make her face the cruel world of nursing school. And, being unprepared to present at the job will be worse, so, maybe with a bit of counseling and tough love when needed, may be what she needs. I remember feeling like a failure myself at times. Remind her of how you made it out of there alive, and try to see what she needs to make it through. Good luck to the both of you!

[sharona97, BSN, RN]

I totally agree with all of these posts. I too suffer from panick attacks since my misdiagnosis, long after my LPN schooling. I know I made it through school motivated by anger in my life at that time. Your daughter is very lucky to have your concern. I wish her well and hope she continues. She's needed!

[pebbles, BSN, RN]

Find out why she isn't doing the prep work ahead of time. If she isn't comfortable talking to you, maybe a counselor at the school could help. I think this is probably connected in some way to her panic attacks.

I've heard of people who don't prepare and don't apply themselves out of fear of failure.

Or simple fear of the task ahead, seems too daunting all at once. (How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time.)

Maybe she isn't really ready for nursing or her heart isn't in it. If you're a nurse and your mom's a nurse, it might be hard for her to say it if she is having doubts.

Is she connecting with her fellow students and making friends? Sometimes that can make a world of difference too.

Also, I think if she has been sent home for panic attacks (a medical problem!) twice, you should insist that she see a doctor and also start doing something to help herself get out of this problem. She may need medication, depending on what is causing her anxiety. She may be an adult, but she's still in adolescent mode a bit (esp if she is living at home while she's in school), and sometimes a stern talking-to from a mom isn't out of line. My mom did that for me a few times too.

[joannep]

Thanks for all your replies,

She has been to see our family doctor today and tells me she feels more comfortable.

She reassures me that she does want to do nursing, she knows she didn't prepare for these clinicals, because she has been spending her time on the computer on internet dating sites and chat sites!

She has spent all of today, after being sent home, studying up what is required and she is happy to go back tomorrow.

So we will see how tomorrow goes.

I think it has been a wake up call for her.

[ann945n, RN]

I was having what I thought were heart attacks while in nursing school. Had it checked out and was dx with panic induced chest pain. The PA told me to find ways to calm down and relax. I did this and since have never had another episode of chest pain (I dont take any drugs either) I think knowing why something is happening can really help control it from happening again. Also like other posters said, some teachers will make your life H*LL. Just a bad mesh of personalities or something. I would just support her and help her find ways to make it through this rough quater. We all have one of those quaters! Sometimes just a shoulder to cry on and supportive words are all we need to make it through. I always remember the kind words of nicer instructors when a meaner one is tearing me a new one!

[mauxtav8r]

Just a word about the "instructors from . . ." I noticed during clinicals that some instructors are Jekyll & Hyde and once they see you apply yourself and come in prepared, they actually lighten up quite a bit.

I may have a totally different experience than another student because my preparation for clinical was different from theirs.

Sad truth is, though, once they think they need to "ride" you, they will, until you give them lots of reasons not to. Key idea here is, give them NO REASON to doubt you or your skills.

[sharona97, BSN, RN]

One of my clinical instructors was a previous army sargeant. She was tough , no doubt. I just ca;)me prepared and didn't take her style of teaching personally. I do realize everyone has to own their experence the best way they can. If it wasn't tough, I'd like to think we have a totally new breed of nurses.