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BON and alleged verbal abuse via pt

Nurses   (4,489 Views 85 Comments)
by Beldar_the_Cenobite Beldar_the_Cenobite (Platinum*) Platinum*

Beldar_the_Cenobite works as a Certified Nursing Assistant.

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Beldar_the_Cenobite works as a Certified Nursing Assistant.

12,156 Visitors; 435 Posts

1 minute ago, not.done.yet said:

Your goals, dreams etc have nothing to do with the situation Beldar. So no, they will absolutely not consider any if that if you acted in a way that makes patients or their families feel less than well cared for.

I mentioned those meaning if the ombudsman knows people who are like CNAs are in nursing school because people want to improve their education. Don't they represent the state? 

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not.done.yet has 8 years experience as a MSN, RN and works as a Professional Development Specialist.

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Even if they did, your career goals would not factor in. Not even a little. I am, to be honest, confused why you would think that matters and why it would factor in if your behavior was less than what it should have been. Being a student doesn't give you a pass for being unprofessional and isn't going to sway anyone toward saving you. If anything it will motivate them to weed you out before you get even higher on the ladder and with even more responsibility for the care of vulnerable populations.

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Beldar_the_Cenobite works as a Certified Nursing Assistant.

12,156 Visitors; 435 Posts

2 minutes ago, not.done.yet said:

Even if they did, your career goals would not factor in. Not even a little.

Meaning I could still get into nursing school after this? I mean, I talked to a nurse at another facility I was working at about this and she said she dealt with a CNA who physically hit a patient. I was mortified when she told me that because I would never hit a patient. She also said theft is very serious too. I said I've never done anything malign to a patient. She said it's possible you could just get a slap on the wrist by an ombudsman. 

 

I always try to be a good CNA. I want to be a good CNA and a good nurse. I've had families tell me you'd make a good nurse. Yesterday I had a patient call me "the man". Not sure why, maybe because she liked me for some reason. 

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not.done.yet has 8 years experience as a MSN, RN and works as a Professional Development Specialist.

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I see.

I doubt this would keep you from getting into nursing school unless criminal complaints have been lodged.

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Beldar_the_Cenobite works as a Certified Nursing Assistant.

12,156 Visitors; 435 Posts

6 minutes ago, not.done.yet said:

I see.

I doubt this would keep you from getting into nursing school unless criminal complaints have been lodged.

I view this as a criminal complaint against me. Maybe I'm wrong and it's not that. I don't know. I don't know what a criminal complaint would be like. I don't do drugs, I don't steal from patients or from facilities, I don't hit patients, I always try to be really down to earth with some of the residents. Once I informed a patient who was having trouble with BM that if he lays in the fetal position, holds his legs up against his chest to make a squatting like position, he could release better. He told me it works. Every time he had his call light on to be changed, he thanked me for telling him how to release easier. I don't know if this is considered a misdemeanor or felony, but I am truly mortified and daunted by the venomous feeling of guilt and that I will never get to work as a CNA again or get into nursing school. I feel like it's that strict. Like one chance is all you get. Like nursing is a risky death trap for easy unemployment where all your opportunities you had are gone because you were frustrated at the lack of help you were getting and may have said something that the patient took the wrong way or what you were trying to professionally tell your supervisor who was doing your job while you were busy you were helping to remind him in the future when he wants help for that patient. 

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22 minutes ago, NurseBlaq said:

People know when they should be offended and when others say things that aren't on the up and up.

Generally true, but that is not to say that if someone is offended, wrong things have been done or said. They might know to be offended when they should, and separately they might just be offended. Anyway it usually isn't too difficult to just take a few precautions towards maintaining someone's dignity. Coordinate efforts outside of the room/out of earshot as much as possible. Always be pleasant/professional when interacting with the patient. Make sure the patient is safe and then excuse yourself if you have begun a process and realize you need more help. Etc.

I'm sure it doesn't feel good to be in a position to require an inordinate amount of help/people, but at the same time you don't have the right to begrudge the people who do actually have to do some "things"  to make arrangements for that same care. To begrudge this is to be manipulative: Often enough it leads to caregivers doing things they shouldn't so that they don't so much as appear to be remotely worried about extra help or special arrangements, since that might make the patient feel bad. I read this (OP) situation as: Extreme care not used to try to maintain dignity + patient generally begrudging the efforts required = trouble.

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12 minutes ago, Beldar_the_Cenobite said:

Your bold statement highlighted "I didn't call the patient a fat cow or a whale". Meaning I KNOWINGLY was in her room and didn't say those things to that level. Maybe it was something else that she might have taken to offense. Maybe I was verbally analyzing what kind of CNAs I work with and how many it would take to pull her up. Maybe it was just when I told my nurse "We have to have at least 4 people to pull her up". When some CNAs help they look like they're holding a tray in place when they hold the draw sheet instead of actually lifting. They don't actually lift. They're not actually putting in the effort. When someone asks me to help them pull someone up, I NEVER say no find somebody else. That was one of two of my frustrations. The first one that I couldn't get any help with my nurse and I pulling her up. There are times when I wish management, non-nursing related, could also be accountable in helping CNAs when it comes to answering call lights and pulling patients up in bed. 

Even as a nurse you may be upset but you still have to be mindful of where you're at and not offend the patients. Despite how you feel or what you meant to say the patient was offended. Apologizing and saying maybe I relayed my words wrong or misspoke would have gone a long way. However, I don't know what the patient felt or who or what investigated but it warranted you being walked out of the building. I'm not sure if you can do anything about that or if it was the final straw to a list of things management has against you and that was the final straw.

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2 minutes ago, JKL33 said:

Generally true, but that is not to say that if someone is offended, wrong things have been done or said. They might know to be offended when they should, and separately they might just be offended. Anyway it usually isn't too difficult to just take a few precautions towards maintaining someone's dignity. Coordinate efforts outside of the room/out of earshot as much as possible. Always be pleasant/professional when interacting with the patient. Make sure the patient is safe and then excuse yourself if you have begun a process and realize you need more help. Etc.

I'm sure it doesn't feel good to be in a position to require an inordinate amount of help/people, but at the same time you don't have the right to begrudge the people who do actually have to do some "things"  to make arrangements for that same care. To begrudge this is to be manipulative: Often enough it leads to caregivers doing things they shouldn't so that they don't so much as appear to be remotely worried about extra help or special arrangements, since that might make the patient feel bad. I read this (OP) situation as: Extreme care not used to try to maintain dignity + patient generally begrudging the efforts required = trouble.

I didn't begrudge what he said in the OP, I found fault with the sidebar jabs and the immediate insult as a result of pointing it out. We've all been in adverse positions at work. Can't say you work in nursing and not have a bad day, we all have them.

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Beldar_the_Cenobite works as a Certified Nursing Assistant.

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2 minutes ago, NurseBlaq said:

Apologizing and saying maybe I relayed my words wrong or misspoke would have gone a long way. 

I tried to apologize, but it made her more upset. Not sure why. I apologized to her in front of her mother. I've worked with residents who were big. Not once did I ever comment on their weight. 

Just now, NurseBlaq said:

 Can't say you work in nursing and not have a bad day, we all have them.

And does the Ombudsman understand that or is that absolutely no excuse? That is one of the reasons why I wrote my post. 

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26 minutes ago, Beldar_the_Cenobite said:

Meaning I could still get into nursing school after this? I mean, I talked to a nurse at another facility I was working at about this and she said she dealt with a CNA who physically hit a patient. I was mortified when she told me that because I would never hit a patient. She also said theft is very serious too. I said I've never done anything malign to a patient. She said it's possible you could just get a slap on the wrist by an ombudsman. 

 

I always try to be a good CNA. I want to be a good CNA and a good nurse. I've had families tell me you'd make a good nurse. Yesterday I had a patient call me "the man". Not sure why, maybe because she liked me for some reason. 

I don't see this as being career ending for nursing school.

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TriciaJ has 37 years experience as a RN and works as a Retired.

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16 minutes ago, Beldar_the_Cenobite said:

I view this as a criminal complaint against me. Maybe I'm wrong and it's not that. I don't know. I don't know what a criminal complaint would be like. I don't do drugs, I don't steal from patients or from facilities, I don't hit patients, I always try to be really down to earth with some of the residents. Once I informed a patient who was having trouble with BM that if he lays in the fetal position, holds his legs up against his chest to make a squatting like position, he could release better. He told me it works. Every time he had his call light on to be changed, he thanked me for telling him how to release easier. I don't know if this is considered a misdemeanor or felony, but I am truly mortified and daunted by the venomous feeling of guilt and that I will never get to work as a CNA again or get into nursing school. I feel like it's that strict. Like one chance is all you get. Like nursing is a risky death trap for easy unemployment where all your opportunities you had are gone because you were frustrated at the lack of help you were getting and may have said something that the patient took the wrong way or what you were trying to professionally tell your supervisor who was doing your job while you were busy you were helping to remind him in the future when he wants help for that patient. 

It's a misdemeanor or felony when law enforcement has to get involved, in which case you'd be arrested or charged.  This is nowhere near that.  This is someone who took umbrage at something you said, or how you said it, or nothing at all.  It's for the ombudsman to sort out if she is actually being mistreated in the nursing home; it's for the nursing home to sort out if any of their employees is more trouble than they're worth.

Beldar, some people have suggested you get counseling.  They may have been snarky but it might actually help you.  I think you need someone in your life who is professional, objective, can help you navigate your next step in life, and maintains your privacy.  A bunch of strangers on the internet will be hit and miss at best.

Wishing you the best.

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Beldar_the_Cenobite works as a Certified Nursing Assistant.

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3 minutes ago, NurseBlaq said:

I didn't begrudge what he said in the OP, I found fault with the sidebar jabs and the immediate insult as a result of pointing it out. We've all been in adverse positions at work. Can't say you work in nursing and not have a bad day, we all have them.

What sidebar jabs? What you consider sidebar jabs were not what I said and I know what I didn't say. If I called her a whale or something, that's outright corrupt from a moral perspective in this field. 

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