Best Nurse Puns

Nurses Humor

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Specializes in Private Duty Pediatrics.

These are great, especially #5 and #15.

Which ones do you like?

 

https://bit.ly/3tL1eV

Specializes in Med nurse in med-surg., float, HH, and PDN.

So far, #'s 8, 12 and 14 tickled my funny bone. I have to go back now and read the rest---

Specializes in Med nurse in med-surg., float, HH, and PDN.

---- and 34, 35 and 36 were also funny. 

Thanks for posting this, dianah!

Specializes in Dialysis.

Cute for the afternoon 

Specializes in Private Duty Pediatrics.
Specializes in OR, Nursing Professional Development.
Kitiger said:

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You need to check out the game of groans thread in the lounge. Plenty along these lines there!

Specializes in Emergency Department.
Rose_Queen said:

You need to check out the game of groans thread in the lounge. Plenty along these lines there!

Just came across this thread and you beat me to it Rose_Queen.

To anyone else who sees these, come over to the Game of Groans thread. Some awful puns and some really good funnies there. Everyone welcome. 

Specializes in Emergency Department.
GrumpyRN said:

Just came across this thread and you beat me to it Rose_Queen.

To anyone else who sees these, come over to the Game of Groans thread. Some awful puns and some really good funnies there. Everyone welcome. 

Or.... Just had this thought. Do we open this thread and make it the new Game of Groans?

More people will see it here and hopefully contribute.

Specializes in Emergency Department.

Well it is coming up for the weekend again so here is another collection of groans.

I am also going to post this in The Game of Groans thread over in The Lounge. Maybe get more participants.


I recently took my naval exams. I got 7 C's.

Having just found out what MILF means I'm becoming increasingly concerned about 80's sitcom ALF.

If I ever find the guy who messed up my limb transplants, I'm going to kill him with my bear hands.

I'm thinking of buying some Stephen King audiobooks, but I've heard a few horror stories.

If Bing Crosby was great, imagine how good Google Crosby would have been.

I fixed Aretha Franklin's computer. It would appear sisters are not doing IT for themselves.

Not a good start to my first day in mine clearance. Let's just say it took me a while to find my feet.

In the 80's my nickname was 'Drugs', because when I asked girls out, they'd just say 'No'.

My psychiatrist keeps shouting that he's fallen into a well, but I think it's really just a cry for help.

Stick insects have sex very carefully in case of fire.

I ordered a load of bubble wrap just to see what it's delivered in.


OK, that's enough for now. Please feel free to add more to the jokes, either here or on The Game of Groans thread, the more the merrier.

Take care and have a good and safe weekend.

Specializes in Private Duty Pediatrics.
Specializes in Emergency Department.

Evening all, I have posted this in the Game of Groans thread but thought I would post it here as well. Please feel free to add your own funnies.

Haven't posted for a while so here goes;

 

I went to the zoo the other day, they only had one dog there. It was a Shih tzu.

My psychiatrist keeps shouting that he's fallen into a well , but I think it's really just a cry for help.

I was at the bookshop and the conspiracy theory section was roped off. I can't believe that's just a coincidence.

Walt Disney always swore he'd never allow Mickey Mouse to be used for tacky merchandising. "Not on my watch."

I've just been on a course on sexual harassment in the workplace and I think I'm getting really good at it.

Thinking of investing my life savings in a company that makes wedding cakes, but I'm worried it'll all end in tiers.

I think if I could have just one superpower it'd be China.

I met a man who reminded me of my dad. He came up to me and said, "Don't forget your dad."

When people tell me I'm too anal, I just give them a wry smile and add their name to my spreadsheet.

I'm in a same sex relationship. After 20 years the sex is always the same.

 

OK, take care everyone stay well and stay safe.

 

Specializes in Emergency Department.

Hi folks, here are a few funnies for you. Feel free to come over to the Game of Groans thread for more.

 

I rang up a sex line. The woman said, "I'll do anything you want." I said, "OK, reverse the charges."

The 300th rule of OCD club is...

My dad had a chicken farm, rather than do it himself.

Nowadays, Botox is nothing to be frowned upon.

Just re-reading Peter Pan. It never gets old.

People who believe in homeopathy are OK in small doses.

It must be hard getting dumped by someone with Multiple Personality Disorder. "It's not you, it's us."

Fun idea: Not got kids? Hire a babysitter anyway, say your kid is asleep upstairs and not to be wakened. On your return ask where your child is.

I read a book on cocaine addiction, after the first few lines I was hooked.

 

Have good weekend everyone.

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