Tarrant County College Fall 2012 - Page 39

I found this on allnurses and thought it was funny...

Nursing Notes

CARDIAC
*patient has chest pains if she lies on her left side for over a year.
*by the time she was admitted to the hospital, her rapid heart had stopped and she was feeling much better.
MUSCULOKELETAL
*on the second day, the knee was better, and on the third day, it had completeley disappeared.
*while in the emergency department, she was examined, X-rated and sent home.
NEUROLOGIC
*patient was alert and unresponsive.
*healthy appearing, decrepit 69-year-old female, mentally alert, but forgetful.
*she is numb from her toes down.
GASTROINTESTINAL
*rectal examination revealed a normal-size thyroid.
*the patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.
*she stated that she had been constipated for most of her life until 1989, when she got a divorce.
*bleeding started in the rectal area and continued all the way to Los Angeles
*the patient was to have a bowel resection. However, he took a job as a stockbroker instead.
*fleet enema given with stool hard as pine knots.
*patient complains of indigestion since last night when he ate a stake.
*patient passed flatus... two short, one long.
*patient was seen in consultation by the physician who felt we should sit tight on the abdomen and I agreed.
GYNECOLOGIC/UROLOGIC
*examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus-sized.
*indwelling urinary catheter draining clear yellow roses.
*examination of genitalia was completely negative except for the right foot.
*pelvic examination to be done later on the floor.
*indwelling catheter draining large amount of urine the color of American beer.
*MD at bedside attempting to urinate. Unsuccessful. (The physician was actually attempting to intubate).
SOCIAL HISTORY
*the patient lives at home with his mother, father and pet turtle, who is presently enrolled in day care three times a week.
*patient was in his usual state of good health until his airplane ran out of gas and crashed.
*examination reveals a well-developed male lying in bed with his family in no distress.
MISCELLANEOUS
*the skin was moist and dry.
*both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accomodation.
*the baby was delivered; the cord clamped and cut and handed to the pediatrician, who breathed and cried immediately.
*skin: somewhat pale, but present.
*i saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy.
*because she can't get pregnant with her husband. I thought you'd like to work her up.
*the test indicated abnormal lover function.
*if he squeezes the back of his neck for 4 or 5 years, it comes and goes.
*discharge status: alive, but without permission.
(by JAN BLACK, RN, OCN)

looks like they were giving it to us straight...on to next week we go. I really think the delay is pending on logistics with the new BSN/Tarlton(?) endeavor. I mean basically this acceptance process comes down to ranking the applications on two criteria, gpa and hesi scores. Unless I'm mistaken, the background checks and verifications come after so I'm struggling to wrap my mind around the delay. Last year I can understand since they were in the middle of moving to the TR campus. My guess is that they are still trying to figure out staffing and space availability to see how many applicants they can accept. Because of the new changes underway, I'm sure there are a lot of variables they're having to consider. And the last thing they want is another El Centro type situation on their hands. That would be awful! Have you heard if the new letters have gone out yet?

I have no idea if my theory is right but at least it lessens my frustration with them. I'm sure they're working as fast as they possibly can. And they probably can't wait for the phones to stop ringing!!! lol Nice distraction there, vc. I actually laughed at a few of them...

I so wanna go shopping for nursing stuff!

I'm having a hard time focusing on finals. Thought I'd come on here and find someone online but it's looking really 'red' out there. I hope that means you're all out celebrating cinco de mayo and enjoying your weekend! About to hit up Margaritaville myself.

Anybody else noticing all the sales and free shipping on behalf of nurses week? Hope we can take advantage of all the deals this week!

That would be very nice to be able to take advantage of sales & free shipping.
I think we ALL need to cut loose this weekend and have a good time!
Next week is OUR week. Woohooo!!

I think I was just so sure yesterday was the day, I was shocked all over again. Now my inner Eyore is coming out and random thoughts are running through my mind. I am really hoping they do not wait until Friday! Also, on the shopping front Amazon student has some pretty good deals. I keep waiting since it is free for six months I don't want to enroll until I am sure I will need it!

I feel the same way ladies, I can't seem to stay focused, I really really hope we don't have to wait til Friday :-/ it seems like we've been waiting forever :-(

I sure hope it's earlier too! I feel like I'm on a see-saw, up and positive one moment and discouraged the next. At least this part of the process will soon be over, then we can be anxious about something else. lol
Does anybody know when classes start this Fall? I think my summer school class finishes Aug 16 so maybe Monday the 20th??? B&Csmom, I've never heard of Amazon student, need to check that out!

So true. This week is Nurses Week so good luck to all the nursing applicants and future nurses : )

This is our week! Good luck guys! Caitlyn that was nicely put