To all the mothers: Day Care Advice (long)

[Prettyladie]

I also put this in the general forum as well, to get more input..

Hello Allnurses!

I just got accepted into Midwestern State's BSN Program for the fall. The school is a 150 miles from my parents house, which I reside, so of course I'm moving. I have a soon to be 3 month old little boy =) I do have a babysitter down here who has been watching my nephew until he was able to go to school as well as my niece. They are now 6 and 7. She is currently keeping my other niece who is 20 months old. She is wonderfullll. And plus she is a great family friend. Now seeing how I will move, I have nobody to watch my son when needed. My bf is currently in jail for something he didn't do, no he isnt a dead beat and whatever else you might be thinking. He goes to court on the 23rd of this month, so I'm not sure what will happen, if they have to reset his court date again, or he goes to trial or whatever, the point is, I don't know if he will be out in time when school starts. So my question is to all the mothers, or even Aunties who have custody of their nieces, nephews, anybody with children, or who have experiece with children, how do you pick a day care. My sister advised me to go to the Child Protective Services website and look at all the day cares and people who do child care throught out their homes and look at their ratings. She said pay attention to how long they have been in business, how long they have had their issuance of their license, and the ratings. After 7 pages of day cares and people, I have narrowed it down to 5. Four are licensed day cares and they have been in business from 1986, 1988, 1996, and 1998. No violations, no complaints, passed inspection. Then I have another woman, she is registered does child care from her home, has been doing business since 1998, no violations, no complaints, passed inspection. I need help on choosing. How do I go about this? Do I go set up a visit? What questions should I ask? Any suggestions and advice would help. I think I can narrow it down to three, because I know I will be in clinicals and those start around 6:30-6:45 right? And two of those don't take children until 7AM. The woman in her house starts at 6AM until 6PM, the other two are 6:30-5:30. Please help me out. I'm terrrrrrrrrrified of day cares. There is always a story on the news "we're sorry, we didn't know we left little Billy in the van", or "omgsh, i don't know how he fell" or "i didn't hit him T H A T hard". I know mothers can really understand what I'm coming from. So please help me out. I will be so appreciative. Hopefully, my bf will be out in time, so I won't have to go through any of this, but if he's not I need help. Please keep us in your prayers.

-Prettyladie.

[rph3664]

Your headline should say "To all parents" because day care isn't just a moms issue.

I just came from another message board where I posted "In most families, could you imagine what would happen if a father made a doctor's appointment or arranged for child care? He would NEVER hear the end of it!" and to my complete surprise, I got flamed!

[Prettyladie]

you're right. i should change the title, but don't know how and its habit for me saying that basically being a single mother, but everything else you're talking about.. i dont have clue what you're trying to say.

[Karen1984]

I have 3 children ranging in age from 4, 3, and 1. My husband left the day our youngest daughter turned 2 months old and since I was just starting my pre-reqs for nursing (I just got in!) I had to find a daycare. So I have experience with what I'm doing here.

First, make an appointment to go and see the daycares that you've narrowed it down to. Usually the best time to go is between 12-2pm. Nap Time. Easier for teachers to give you a few minutes to answer any questions you have when they don't have a half a dozen kids asking for attention.

Make a list of questions before you go. Times, prices, prices for being late. Whether or not you're child's age group goes anywhere, does any special projects. What you'd need to supply for the child while they are there. What kinds of policies do they have regarding sick children and pick up times and return times. Discipline methods. Etc.

Talk to the daycare's director, the teacher that would care for your child and everyone else you can get your hands on.

Then make a decision based on what you've been told, what you've read, what you've heard and how you felt. You want to be comfortable around the people taking care of your child. Most importantly you want to make sure you can trust them.

Good Luck.

[Prettyladie]

That's realllly good information. I will definitely write down what you said =) I'm so nervous about this, but I know i have to do it.

[rachelerin]

I have a three year old who has been in day care since he was 2 months old. I agree with most of what karen1984 says EXCEPT the visiting at nap time. I would go when the kids are awake. You can get a better idea of how the person deals with children. I went with a home daycare when my son was a baby because I wanted him to be in a more home-like environment. When he turned 3, I moved him into a preschool. Also, be SURE to get MANY references (the more the better) and remember to trust your instincts, you are the mommy and you know what is best for your baby!!

[djNyla]

I agree with both Rachel and Karen. When I was looking for a day care I would visit at various times more than once at the same location I was interested in. I also made a mental note as to how many kids per adults were present at the time. I made sure it was a female (no offense to the males, this is my preference) who was watching the younger kids. Ask questions like, what is the policy if you are late picking up your child, or if you can bring them 30 minutes earlier (some places offer that). Make sure you are able to pop in unannounced to view the area your kid is in. If you decide to go with a home-care daycare, make sure you frequently visit the place your child is at. Check for cleanliness of the location too. Observe how the other kids treat each other while in her care.

This is a difficult choice for you! I hope your boyfriend is able to help out in time. Good luck!

[Prettyladie]

my friend said the same thing. make sure that i can just pop in. she was saying that if they say call before you come, then they are trying to fix something up real quick. or trying to hide something. the ladie i really liked i spoke with over the phone for about 30 minutes. she was verrry nice and she was a gma, her information was current with CPS and no comments, no bad remarks, no failed inspections. B U T now she says well i want to see my granddaughter cheer and i dont want to miss her games, so now she is bringing her pick up date back to around 330 or 400. so im like ummm...lol. i told her id look at the schedule and see how the classes were running. the latest i seen was a patho class at 650. thats throwing me a loop any way. so im just trying to pray for some good news about my bf. who is my childs father, because i posted this in the general forum and it caused a ruckus because they were saying dont leave your child with a boyfriend. we're assuming he is not the childs father. she was assuming that because i call him my bf. i was like well he's not my husband.. lol annnyyways.. im still looking for options.

[futurearmynurse25]

I think I can help you out a little bit. I've also been accepted into Midwestern's BSN program, and everyone was right on with the questions to ask. I have a 3 year old daughter, and my daughter is currently in day care. I went down to Wichita Falls before I applied, and a store clerk gave me a phone book. After I found out I was accepted I started going down the list of apartments, head start, and day care programs. Many of them had a waiting list, and I believe only 4 of the day cares had a 6a-6p or 7am-7pm. They don't really have a big selection of choices as the DFW area has it. You're child is only allowed to be at the day care for 10 hours only. I'm going to the new student orientation on May 28 at 9am so at that time I'm going to look around at some day cares also. They said you can just come you don't have to reserve a spot, and your family can come also. My 16 year old nephew is going to come live with me to help me out while I'm in the program. If you have any more question feel free to PM me I would be happy to help you out. Good luck with your bf!